


Problematic Teens

by Koibitotedare



Category: Fullmetal Alchemist
Genre: Other
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2012-12-15
Updated: 2014-02-16
Packaged: 2017-11-21 05:26:19
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 14
Words: 70,593
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/593954
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Koibitotedare/pseuds/Koibitotedare
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>You wake up without knowing how you got to Drachma, of all places, and for some reason you are in the colonel's lap. You can't pull up the energy to be embarrassed about this but you are curious about the girl in the room. Who is she? Why are you so injured? WHERE is Alphonse? And why is the Colonel taking you to his house? Re-posted Parental RoyXEd. Rated for Language and mature themes.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Waking Up

**This story is dedicated to all of those who loved the series including**

**Pop30118**

**OhHolyCow**

**Squee-Bunny**

**Thanks to those three I have realized how loved the story was and have decided to rewrite it. You can thank them for the posting of this story.**

**Chapter one**

**Waking up**

" _Calm down kid, you're doing just fine."_ You could hear the words echoing in the back of your mind but the terror of the things chasing after you overrode the calm sensation such words were supposed to bring. You couldn't move your arms, you felt pressure on your wrists, they were being held. You wondered why these things wanted you so badly. You didn't feel like they would answer if you asked so you continued to try and wiggle out of the invisible bonds on your body.

_"Edward, calm down now."_ Was that….the colonel? Your body felt so heavy you were losing the battle. You hated to admit it, _really hated_ to admit it but you needed some help.

"Colonel." The word escapes your lips and the things pounce on you and you are too weak to even try to lift an arm. Black bodies wiggle over your own and you feel pain, "COLONEL!" You scream you can help it, you heard him and you're scared. The weights disappear from your wrists but you can't gather the energy to lift an arm to swat at the things. They tear at your skin devouring it; you are momentarily distracted when you feel a warm pressure on the side of your face. It is secure and you feel almost as if you were being pressed into a body. The pain of having your own flesh ripped off brings you back to whatever is happening.

_"I'm right here Edward, open your eyes you'll see."_ Open them? No way he wouldn't, couldn't! He could already feel what was happening he didn't want to _see_ it too!

"No." Your voice cracks, you're so scared, you know you're going to die.

_"Don't cry."_ Now you're just ashamed, you feel the tears sliding down your disappearing cheeks. The salty tears disappear into the wounds on your face making them burn. You try shaking your head but that warm pressure is still there. You feel as if you are being moved and suddenly that warm sensation takes over your body. Slowly the pain fades and you can't feel anything eating away at your flesh. Your body still feels heavy and your head is starting to hurt. You bury your face into that sweet warmth. Your breathing, which was erratic and choppy, starts to change. You feel pressure on the back of your head and you squeeze your eyes tighter.

_"It's time to wake up now."_ Wake up? You weren't sleeping, you were just saved from being eaten alive, _"Open your eyes Ed."_ As you rub your face further into that warmth you begin to feel tired, truly tired. You feel the heat shifting and you don't want it to leave.

"No…" You don't want it to leave, you want to say, "Don't go" but the words won't come out.

_"Wake up."_ You were too nervous to open your eyes, if you did what would you see? You decide it can't hurt to just peak. You crack your eyes open just barely enough to see blue. Just blue. You nearly sigh with relief. This gives you the courage to open your eyes half way. Your head starts to pound and black spots dot your vision. You give a groan of pain as lights flood your vision.

"Edward?" The voice sounds excited and the heat on the back of your head moves to your shoulders, "Are you with us?"

"Ugh, 'S bright." You mumble. You hear several sighs of relief and it makes you wonder what happened, you don't remember much or anything at all really. The heat shifts a little and you move closer not wanting it to leave and the area you're in becomes a little darker letting you crack your eyes open a little more. You see a sliver band in the swarm of blue and you try to lift a finger to touch it. You aren't sure what it is and your curiosity strikes. It is smooth underneath your right hands fingers. You blink at the fingers wondering why they didn't look normal to you.

"Edward, can you hear me?" You automatically look up to where the voice is coming from to see a splotch of darkness that automatically makes your heart jump at the thought of the little black bodies coming back to take your flesh. You feel your body stiffen and you realize that the heat you'd been feeling the whole time was a body. There is a hand around your shoulders and an arm across your legs holding you still. You nearly scramble away in your haste to get away from the black mass but the arms hold you still.

"N-No!"

"Edward calm down and look around you." Surprisingly you do as you're told and as you crack your eyes open again you realize that you're actually in the lap of Roy Mustang. Embarrassment crawls over your face as it turns red and you try to move out of his lap.

"Let go!" Your voice cracks as you push at his chest.

"Why? You were quite content a few moments ago." That stupid smirk was placed on the colonel's face and you could feel your cheeks warming up.

"Ah Colonel don't tease him this is serious." You glance to the right to see Havoc also sitting, and with a strange girl in his arms.

"Right, Ed what do you remember?" You blink and take in your surroundings as your head starts pounding. Everyone, save for Hawkeye, is standing around you looking fairly concerned. You notice that you are in an unfamiliar room and much to your embarrassment; you are _still_ in the colonel's lap.

"Remember?" You don't remember how you got in this room or why you're in the colonel's lap.

"Yes, do you remember how you got your arm and leg back?" You glance at the arm that looked so strange to you and you remember that it used to be metal and that's why it looked strange. You notice that your leg is now flesh too. You shake your head feeling slightly baffled as you wiggle your flesh toes and your flesh fingers, "Do you know where Alphonse is?"

"Al?" Your voice cracks now and you fly straight into a panic. You manage to roll away from the colonel and you get on your hands and knees, "AL!" You stand but as soon as you are on both feet you lose your balance and you pitch forward. Breda catches you around the middle and sits you back on the floor.

"Calm down Edward." Your breathing is erratic now, you _can't_ find Al.

"Where's Al?" You're in full panic now as you look around the room and you just don't see him.

"FullMetal!" You jump at Mustang's bark and for the first time you really look at him. He seemed exhausted and his appearance is haggard. His uniform has some random blood stains on it but the colonel didn't seem to be harmed. You look at yourself and nearly gasp in shock. You are covered in wounds that have been tended to, but your clothing is drooping over your body looking at least three sizes too big.

"W-what happened?" Mustang sighs and runs his hand down his face then back up into his hair.

"We were hoping you could fill us in but it doesn't look like you remember anything. We thought that bump on your head wasn't too serious but it seems we were wrong." You bring a hand to your head and suddenly the pounding makes sense as your fingers come into contact with a somewhat large bump.

"How did I…" You can't remember feeling so confused before. Suddenly you're feeling quite lightheaded and your vision briefly blacks out.

"Ed!" When you can see again you notice that you're on the floor. Mustang pulls you back into his lap, he holds your head up and tilts your chin back as your breathing gets thinner, this allows you to take in deeper breaths, "Calm down Edward, we'll figure this out." You're too tired to even try and argue. You're eyes land on the girl in Havocs lap, she looks badly injured and if it wasn't for the very slight rise and fall of her chest you would think that she was dead.

"W-who is she?" You ask quietly.

"Dunno, she was with you when we found you both on the floor," Havoc answers while he shifts her head in his arm.

"We aren't even sure if we can trust her," Fuery speaks for the first time since you opened your eyes.

"You can trust her," the words slip out of your mouth before you can think.

"Do you remember something?" Breda asks. You shake your head, regretting the decision as the room spins and you automatically clutch at the blue cloth and bury your face in Mustangs stomach to keep from puking. The hand from before returns to the back of your head and is strangely comforting. You take a breath and bring your face back into the open Mustang wipes at the tears on your cheeks and you swat at his hands.

"I just know in my gut that you can trust her…" You're feeling slightly out of breath again, "Where's Hawkeye?"

"Scouting for an opening, as soon as she returns we're leaving," Mustang answered, "Try to get some sleep." You stop yourself from nodding,

"Okay." You whisper feeling very tired. You close your eyes and are asleep almost instantly.

* * *

"Shh be quiet."

"Sorry boss." You hear the crunching of twigs and another order to be quiet. You crack your eyes open to see that you are now on the Colonel's back and they are walking through the woods. Your body still feels incredibly weak and you are unable to prevent yourself from sliding downwards on the Colonel. He takes his next step with a hop and you are bumped back up to a more comfortable position. Your head rests on his back and your arms have been placed around his neck. You glance around and see that Hawkeye had joined the group and the girl that you saw before is getting her own piggy back ride from Havoc. Soon the trees start thinning out and they disappear and they are walking in a field of grass. You close your eyes again unable to keep them open. When you open them again the air is hot and a hat has been placed on your head. Sand surrounds the area and you are now looking at the Colonel instead of riding on his back. You look up to see that you are riding on Breda's back instead. The hat falls off and flutters to the ground. Breda notices almost immediately.

"Hat's off," he says and someone sighs. Hawkeye bends down to pick it up when she notices that your eyes are open.

"Afternoon Edward," her voice is warm and her voice is soothing to your ears, "Did you sleep well?" You feel a blush rise in your cheeks as you barely nod. You feel a breeze across your feet and you notice your shoes are gone.

"Where's my shoes?" Your voice is very rough and coarse, it hurts to speak.

"Let's take five," Mustang calls and Breda sighs as he places you on the sand so he can pop his back and sit. Mustang brings a canteen full of water to you, "Here take small sips." You take the water but your hand shakes so badly some spills out. Mustang takes it back and places it on your lips, your temper flares up.

"I can _do_ it." You cough as you aggravate your throat. You expect a sharp retort but Mustang sighs in relief.

"I was wondering when you'd start acting normal again. Now shut up and just let me help." Mustang tilted the canteen back before you could retaliate and you nearly choke on the water but you force yourself to swallow instead. It burns but Mustang doesn't allow you a break he pours more in your mouth and you swallow again feeling that this is too fast. You grasp his hands trying to pull the canteen back down as another small mouthful flows down your throat, this time soothing it. Mustang takes the hint and pulls back a little allowing you to breathe for a moment, "Better?"

"Yeah…" Your throat is still sore but it no longer hurts to talk. He places the back of his hand on your forehead and frowns.

"You still have a fever." You nod your understanding and everything is spinning again, you reach out and grip Mustangs sleeve for balance. He runs some of the water over his hand then places then hand on the back of your neck. The water is cool and it helps to ground you just a little as the spinning slows.

"Thanks," you mumble.

"Think you can handle a little food?" You frown and shake your head; your stomach is churning far too quickly for something as heavy as food. He frowns but doesn't force anything on you, "Alright lets head out," he says to the group.

"Yes sir," Is the immediate response as Mustang clips the canteen on his belt loop.

"Come on Ed up you go." He puts your arms around his neck and you feel embarrassed at having to be carried.

"I can walk," You protest.

"Yeah we saw how well that went last time," Breda snorted as he gripped you around the waist and hoisted you onto the colonel's back. Havoc takes the girl back from Falman and he situates her on his back as well.

"Where are we?" you ask.

"We were in northeast Drachma and now we are walking back to the military's base point in the desert for a lift back home," Havoc answered.

"I don't see Al…" An uncomfortable silence fills the air as the soldiers bit lips or shift weight. You feel a bubble of panic fill your stomach, "You _left_ without him?! We have to go back!" You try wiggling down from the Colonel's back but his grip proves to be too strong for your current state. You figure that if you had your metal limbs that you could just use them to force Mustang to let you down but the facts are that you don't.

"Edward-," You cut him off.

"He's my _brother_! You CAN'T just leave him! He's my LITTLE BROTHER! We're all we've GOT! We're all we've got!" Much to your horror you feel salty tears slipping down your cheeks, "HE'S MY BROTHER!"

"FullMetal!" You jerk to a stop in the middle of your rant; he'd been calling you by your given name so often now that FullMetal made your heart beat faster. You won't deny that you're nervous for his words but you have to find Al, "We _did_ search, we found you and this girl. The rest of the city was gone and Al was nowhere to be found. We aren't just going to give up; you need to start trusting us." Trust? The military? You couldn't do something like that, they never kept their word.

"But-,"

"No buts Edward. You're my subordinate as long as you fight with me I'm on your side, got it?" You force your words back down your throat, this wasn't the military. This was _Mustang_ the man who constantly bent the rules under the table and who constantly made sure that his subordinates were safe. Mustang wasn't the military, an arrogant asshole yes, but trustworthy? You sigh you suppose deep down you always _did_ trust Mustang with a little bit of everything including Alphonse.

"Got it," you mumble back. You still can't help but feel guilty for just leaving Al without looking yourself but what could you do? You couldn't even walk, you felt tired all the time, and even now you felt as if you would fall asleep, "He's my brother." You feel that this is important information that must be shared.

"I know Ed."

 


	2. Journey Home

**Chapter two**

**Journey home**

You're floating on that terrible, fine line of being asleep and being awake. You are about to concentrate on sleep when you hear your name being spoken around you. Your curiosity grows and you fight for consciousness. For some reason you notice that you are not getting a ride on someone's back, this is very nice seeing as though you feel that you can work up the energy to be embarrassed today, instead you feel as if you are lying on something very soft. Your force your heavy eyelids open and focus on the conversation.

"Both seem to be chronically fatigued, the girl more so than Major Elric. Their bodies seem to be dangerously low on nutrients so I've started IV's on both. However they'll need to be moved to Central if you want them to get proper treatment, there is only so much I can do here. They'll probably keep Edward for a day or so and release him to be cared for in a home but that girl you've got seems to be comatose. Her body is self-sustaining but she shows no indication of waking up anytime soon." Wait you're on an IV? That would mean that they put a needle in your…

"Get it out."

"Oh Major Elric, you're awake."

"Get. It. Out." You don't move all you can think is that you'll move in the wrong direction and the needle will rip from your skin and…and…

"Edward you need those nutrients, I don't know if you heard what he said but you're body is very weak and deprived."

"I don't want it."

"Suck it up." Man you hated Mustang sometimes.

"Are you in pain Major Elric? Your body seems quite tense…"

"NO. Get it out!" You nearly move your arm but you aren't sure which arm they mutated.

"Needles and Edward aren't exactly friends." You recognize Hawkeye's sarcastic tone.

"That's a very mild way to put it," Havoc answers. You sigh as they give you slight side looks, you'll have to take the damn thing out yourself…when they leave.

"How are you feeling Major Elric?"

"Like shit," you answer. Your body hurts, you're exhausted, you can't remember what happened to you, and worst of all you don't know where Al is. For some reason this makes you feel emotional and you turn your head away from all the people in the room so they can't see that your eyes are watery. You feel a careful hand on the side of your head; you look up to see Riza Hawkeye smiling down at you.

"Are you in pain?" That stupid doctor just didn't get it.

"Yeah," you answer. He fiddles with the IV on your right side and you feel a little whoosh of nausea. It settles after a moment and your body is tingling with a pleasant numbness.

"Well we'll leave you to rest okay." The doctor ignored Mustang's protest and ushered the whole group out the door. You wanted to rip the damn needle out of your arm the instant that the… _curtain_ closed but your body felt unusually heavy. You glance over to the right to see that girl laying there her own needle in her arm. She looks over at you and winks. Your heart beats faster; she wasn't supposed to be able to wake up was she? You succumb to the heavy feeling of sleep when she puts a finger to her lips and silently blows air through the perfect O.

* * *

You can't help but give the girl across from you a suspicious look she's, of course, out like a light at the moment and showed no sign of waking up or even being awake before, but you _know_ what you saw. You didn't know if she was really awake or not and you weren't quite sure how to test her without alerting the other soldiers in this compact army vehicle. The wind picks up as the driver speeds up and your hair is whipped _once again_ into your eyes. You brush it out and wonder _why_ this new army vehicle, something called a Jeep, was roofless. Your eyes glide back to the girl who had shoulder length, brown with peacock blue splashed, curly as hell hair that was _still_ pretending to be asleep.

"So are you two a thing or something there chief?" You _glare_ at Havoc; you were so not in the mood for any of this shit.

"What?" You bite out. He raises his hands to shoulder level, palms facing out in surrender.

"Sorry, sorry, I just thought that you liked her. You haven't stopped staring at her since we got in this vehicle." Havocs eyes are glistening.

"No. We aren't a _thing_."

"Well how do you know for sure? You _did_ say that you didn't remember anything." You focus your glare on Furey who quickly shuts his mouth and looks away.

"That's true, maybe you two really are a _dating_. Did you finally find love FullMetal?" Now the colonel is making jokes with that infernal _smirk_. You're in the middle of debating the effectiveness of punching said colonel in your current state when the driver runs over a small sand dune and the whole vehicle tilts. The soldiers are able to catch themselves but you launch forward smacking into the girl, who doesn't move. You're sure that a smack like that would have hurt and if she wasn't comatose she would have felt it but she didn't even stir! Just be sure you pinch her arm as the colonel pulls you off of her. You rub your head, which is still sore from whatever happened to you and watch she still hasn't reacted.

"You okay there Edward?" Riza, the only sensible one of the group, gently touches your face gently as you settle back against the side of the truck. You're mind is screaming to say "no" but your mouth has other plans.

"Yeah, I'm fine," you mumble. NO you weren't! You were in pain, dizzy, and this stupid girl was awake and you knew it! You jerk at the sudden touch on your face and look to the side to see Mustang frowning. The back of his hand moves to your forehead, the touch is so foreign you aren't sure how to act other than to give a deer caught in headlights look.

"Your fever is back," the idle chatter that was going on around the vehicle stopped and only the sound of whipping hair and jackets was heard. You aren't sure what to think with the looks that you are receiving; they range from worried to downright terrified. Well it was Fuery that was giving the terrified look so you didn't take it too seriously, "Here drink."

"What? No I'm not thirsty," you push the canteen away. The thought of anything entering the forever churning whirlpool, of your stomach made you feel as if you'd puke.

"Edward you need to keep yourself hydrated," Mustang didn't sound happy and it seemed like he was just going to force it down your throat again.

"I can't," You mentally wince at the pathetic sound that just came from your mouth. Mustang's look softens just a touch and you look away.

"I just need to you drink a little and maybe eat a cracker or two," Mustang hooks a finger around your chin and the others, for your own pride, look away while you are forced to look at those dark eyes, "Edward," a warning. For a long time you don't move but that _stare_ creeps you out and you aren't sure what he's going to do if you don't at least try. Besides Mustang knows how impatient you are and you know that Mustang could keep it up all day if he wanted to. Hell Mustang knew that he could keep it up all day, and damn it all you were starting to fidget.

"Half a cracker?" You meant for it to be a statement, like you weren't going to take any shit from Mustang but your voice broke and it came out as a question. He grabbed a saltine cracker and broke it in half then gave you the right side. You bite off a part of the cracker and chew until its mush in your mouth. You dread swallowing that horrible lump; you know it's going to make you sick up all over the place. As if he knows what you're thinking Mustang hands you the canteen and his eyes twitch like he's trying not to narrow them in your direction. Luckily your hands aren't shaking as bad as they were the first time that you were handed a canteen, but they were still shaky. You take a quick sip of the water and swallow the mushy cracker and water in one go. You feel the powdery residue of the cracker in your throat so you take another swallow of water. You have to admit that it feels better. You manage the whole cracker and several mouthfuls of water before you feel that you can't take anymore.

"Thank you," Mustang says then takes the canteen back. You nearly freeze as you hand the water over, Mustang thanked you….he _thanked_ you for cooperating with him. What was going on? You blinked in confusion and chanced a sneak peak at the man's face as he put the canteen away. There was no smirk or sneer to be seen. You weren't sure what to say at all you were just shocked. A minute passed while Mustang leaned against the side of the car while you merely stared at the passing sand. Another minute passed. And another. You'd never heard Mustang _thank_ you before.

"You're welcome." You don't look at him when you say it. You miss the surprised look he gave you and the nod of acknowledgement. Silence falls over the vehicle and you start to fall asleep as the vehicle rocks back and forth on a series of dunes and ditches. You hear somebody snort and there's a shuffling of boots before someone calls out,

"Colonel." You assume they pointed because you can't see anything due to closed eyes but you feel the hands on your head and around your shoulders that pulls you down. You're momentarily startled at the feeling of falling but a hand runs over your tangled hair soothing the panic. You can't manage to open your eyes but that's okay, you don't feel like working up the energy to be embarrassed because you're pretty damn sure that your head is resting in Mustangs lap again. Somehow that was okay...well only for a while.

* * *

You were comfortable again, warm and relaxed. You think that maybe you shouldn't be this relaxed when Al was missing but you can't help but feel so cozy and happy when you're this warm. You figure you must be back in a hospital bed but normally something tells you that you should be a little alert because you're in a hospital. You crack your eyes open and nearly groan when you notice that you're being carried, by _Mustang_ …again. It should be illegal to feel this _safe_ and warm the pair of arms that belong to your superior. It's dark though, so you don't think anyone notices your open eyes. You take the time to figure out where you are. It seems that you're being carried through Central making you panic about being seen, you are thankful though that people typically stay indoors when the sun goes down. A cool wind blows making you shiver and turn into the warm chest that made your body radiate with its own heat. You are readjusted slightly and with your nose stuck firmly in warmth you nod off again.

"Edward," you recognize that your name is being called but you're so comfortable with how warm you are at that moment that you don't want to respond. You were having a pretty good dream too, at least you think so you don't really remember it. You sigh contently wondering what exactly is going on but you don't care enough to ask.

"What exactly is the chief doing?" Now you're curious, that was Havoc and he _always_ calls you chief. What _were_ you doing? With strength that you didn't know eyelids could possess, you force your eyes open to see that you're clutching to Mustang's jacket. You jump and scramble back; this is all complete with a yelp of your own creation. It was a mix between "What the hell," and "Oh shit."

"Calm down Edward," the colonel doesn't seem to be too happy at the moment. You scoot in reverse until your back hits a wall and you rub your face with your hands noticing a slight pull on your right arm. It's strange to not feel the chilling coolness of your automail and it occurs to you that you don't know where it is.

"Where's my automail?" You scan the people around you trying to figure out if anyone is going to lie.

"Like I said before, we don't know anything that happened while you were off screwing around in Drachma of all places." Mustang said while running a hand down his face. You frown and look around to see white. Always all white. You very nearly pout when you realize that you're in the hospital in central. There is, of course, a needle in your forearm and you wrinkle your nose at the tubing. You blink after noticing that the needle is in your right arm, you lift the arm and look closely at it. You know it's yours, it's exactly as you remember it when you were young, and it even has the scar from when you were bit by the fox. Something however looks off.

"Edward?" You hear Hawkeye call out to you but you don't respond. You bring your left arm up to compare it with the right. The difference is startling; the right arm is much thinner and far paler than the left. You run a finger down the very visible vein in your right arm and you notice the skin is so sensitive that the light touch is almost painful. Perhaps that is something that will fix itself, you aren't really sure. You're positive that there will be differences in strength between the two arms. How much work would you have to do to get the right arm caught up with the left? How were its motor functions? Could you write? Well could you write well or would it look like the scribbling of an 8 year old? Suddenly you want to see the differences of your legs. You pull the shoes; you aren't sure where you got them from, off and blink at the size differences in your feet.

"It almost seems like your body is trying to catch up," Mustang startles you with the sudden speech.

"What do you mean?" Your feet were two different sizes; the right was the size that you'd been wearing since you turned 17 but the left was the size of maybe a 10 year olds foot.

"Your foot and your hand," you look at your hand again and notice it's significantly smaller size, "Have both been growing since we recovered you from Drachma."

"They have?" You're wondering how this would work, why would your body know to catch up?

"You've been groaning in pain every night," Breda said sounding more annoyed than concerned. Now that he mentioned it your right arm was feeling a little sore, you didn't think you could feel anything in your leg though. You sneak a peek at the IV bag that is hanging on your right, morphine. Well that would do it, no wonder you didn't feel pain.

"I wonder if that's why I feel so tired all the time," you mumble aloud. Havoc shrugs and crosses his arms while he chews on his cigarette.

"What are you going to tell them chief?" Havoc asked, changing the subject.

"Who?" You aren't really sure who Havoc is talking about.

"The higher ups," Havoc runs a hand through his hair, "We were supposed to recover you but we weren't given any orders after that. They'll want to know what happened." You sigh; they wouldn't take the truth as the truth either. You contemplate telling them that you're retiring right then and there, but Alphonse's face burns its way into your sights. What if you could use the military to find Alphonse?

"I don't know…" You answer with sagging shoulders. There's a light knock on the door and the attention shifts to the man strutting in.

"Hiya Ed!" Hughes' energy was almost off the charts as he came bursting through the door.

"Hughes, I _don't_ want to see any pictures of your daughter." You rub your face as Hughes reaches into his pocket anyway.

"Look," he coos, "Isn't she precious?"

"Yeah. Precious," you sigh. Hughes finally seems to key in on your mood and pulls out his serious attitude.

"We're going to need to talk Ed," he said while pushing up his glasses, "Alone." This was directed to all of the other soldiers in the room. You sigh thankful that it was Hughes that was sent to talk to you. There were a few claps on your shoulder or leg before the soldiers cleared out. You missed the look that Mustang gave Hughes during your prolonged blink.

"Good luck there chief," Havoc gently brushed his knuckles against your shoulder.

"Thanks." The door clicked shut behind them as they left.

"So, what happened?"

"Couldn't tell you," you answer.

"Ed." You nearly shudder at that tone that Hughes uses when he wants answers. That tone that sounds so much like a father.

"I really can't Hughes."

"Don't give me that Ed. I need to know what happened out there." This time you cringe, he always uses that line.

"I don't _remember_ ," your voice cracks and your hands curl into fists.

"You don't remember?" Hughes' tone is dry and unbelieving.

"All I remember is waking up and being brought back here with Mustang," you answer, "that's it."

"Ed…"

"I can't even remember where….where A-Al is. I don't know what happened to him," your voice becomes thick with emotion and your eyes dart to the ceiling in a hopeless attempt to prevent the tears from falling, "I don't even know if he's alive." You fiercely brush your knuckles under your eyelids.

"Ed how did you get your arm and leg back?" Your anger rises, why didn't he just understand?

"I _don't_ KNOW!" You can't help but shout.

"Cut the shit Ed, I can't help you if you don't tell me what happened."

"How can I tell you if I. Don't. Know." You're done talking all you want to do is sleep and hope that when you wake up Al will be nagging you about something, "I don't remember anything." Hughes sighed and ran a hand through his messy hair.

"Sorry about that kid, I just needed to know for sure that you don't have any memory of what happened," Hughes said as he leaned back in his chair. You frown after realizing that he purposely made you angry.

"They said I hit my head…." You mumble resisting the urge to finger the bandages.

"Yeah, I talked to the doctor. He said you didn't have a deep enough wound to cause any sort of memory loss."

"Then…why can't I remember?" Your heart starts to flutter in your chest.

"Calm down, I'm sure everything will be okay." The prickling tears return in your eyes at the warm tone and the fatherly look. You didn't want to admit it and you probably wouldn't, but you were terrified.

"How do you know?" Hughes shrugs.

"I guess I don't but you have so many people who are going to make sure everything comes out okay in the end."

"…What if it doesn't? What if…what if I can never find Al again?" Hughes smiles and ruffles your hair.

"You're Edward Elric, you entered the military for your little brother and you've done everything you can for him. There is no doubt in my mind that you will find him. He'll be by your side again…"

"Thanks Hughes." Your voice is a hoarse whisper but Hughes nods all the same.

"What are you going to do Ed?" Hughes is serious again.

"What do you mean?"

"Are you going to retire?" You swallow he wouldn't like what you were going to say.

"No. I'm going to use the military to find Al just like I tried to with the philosopher's stone." Hughes sighed but he wasn't going to try and change your mind that much you knew.

"Alright Ed. I'll make something up to tell the higher-ups okay? In the mean time you focus on getting better first and then Al." You nod but you both know that you're lying and that you'll be trying as hard as you can to find Al.

* * *

You were in the middle of trying to get yourself released from this damned hospital but they, as in the doctor and staff, were still trying to put the kibosh on that. They kept telling you that you weren't sufficiently hydrated and just because you were having a hard time with heavy foods meant that you needed to stay longer. You still call bullshit on that. You've already been stuck in that room for a week and you were in no mood to be told no again. You were ready to tear a new one into the next person that walked into the room. You heard the door handle turn and you took a breath to prepare yourself. With an angry scowl in place you prepared your first sentence, which died on your lips as soon as you saw the trigger happy woman named, Riza Hawkeye enter the room followed by a less than happy looking doctor who took out your IV.

"Does this mean I get to go?" She smiled and threw you a change of clothing.

"Get dressed." With only a slight, barely noticeable limp from your somewhat smaller left leg you hurried off to the bathroom and did just that. You frowned at the clothing that was given to you, it was not your normal leather and black shirts. You were given black jeans and a white V-neck with a gold jacket and your red cloak. You chose to drape the cloak over your arm instead of wearing it, you were a little warm. You walk out to see the Lieutenant talking with the doctor. He handed her a bottle of pills and a piece of paper. You scrunch your nose knowing that they'll make you take the medication. The Lieutenant notices you and she offers a smile.

"Come on Edward I'm going to drive you."

"Thanks Lieutenant, I'm sure the guys at the barracks will be _so_ glad to have me back." You chuckle lightly knowing that you were hated among the men in the military's housing. You kept odd hours and had higher rank than most of the guys that bunked in the adjacent rooms so they couldn't do too much about it.

"Oh, I'm sure they won't be too worried."

"…What's that supposed to mean?" You have a feeling that the smile she just gave you was bad news. She started walking away without answering, "Wait…Lieutenant! What do you mean?!"

"Come along Edward," was the only response you received. With a frown you followed after her to the parking lot and into the military issued car that she was starting. You clicked your seatbelt into place and propped your chin on your hand while you watched the scenery pass by the window. Ten minutes into the trip your shoulders began to sag. You resisted the sigh that was piling up in your throat, it was ridiculous feeling so tired after doing practically nothing.

"We've got about thirty minutes left Edward; you're free to take a nap." It seemed, much to your annoyance, that Hawkeye was starting to notice your fatigue too. You straighten your posture and remove your chin from your palm.

"Where are we going Lieutenant?"

"You still aren't one hundred percent Edward."

"…So…" You really weren't seeing the connection yet.

"The hospital staff wouldn't release you unless you had an assigned….guardian."

"I don't need a guardian lieutenant! I've been living on my own for years!"

"No. You've been living with a brother that makes sure you take care of yourself when you get so wrapped up in whatever research you're doing that you forget how to take care of yourself. Trust me Edward I'm well aware of how that worked." You grit your teeth and take a breath trying to push down the emotions you felt at the mention of Al.

"So what? That means I'm living with you?" She chuckled as she turned on her blinker for a right turn.

"You aren't living with me Edward. While I think I could handle you, if you truly wanted something you are a higher rank and even though you don't make it a habit you can hand out orders."

"…Wait a minute…" You blink; the only one in that office with a higher rank than you was… "MUSTANG?! I have to bunk with _Mustang_? Why do you people insist on making my life hell?!"

"Well you didn't seem to mind when we were bringing you back to from Drachma."

"Yeah well I was pretty out of it Lieutenant." She smirks again and presses on the brake when she approaches the stop sign. The rest of the ride is silent as you focus on not falling asleep and the Lieutenant focuses on driving. You finally pull up to a modest looking house that has one floor and a wide yard. The house itself is a deep green color with maroon shutters there is a small deck at the front door and a mailbox on the wall of the house.

"Now the Colonel lives here, it's about 15 or 20 minutes away from HQ okay," the lieutenant started while pulling the key from the ignition and unbuckling her seatbelt, "I've got a few things to finish up from the office and then we can go shopping for a full set of clothing."

"Clothing? Lieutenant I have a full set of clothes in my room at the barracks," you stated very confused.

"Oh trust me Edward I'm well aware of what you think is a full set of clothing. Contrary to your belief two pairs of pants, three tank tops, one jacket, four pairs of boxers, three pairs of socks, and a cloak is not a full set of clothing. The clothes you're wearing now are yours to keep the clothing we recovered from your room is in your room." You blink not sure what to think when she gets out of the car and motions for you to follow. You unbuckle your seatbelt and exit the car.

"You don't really need more clothes than _that_ do you Lieutenant?" The look she threw you made you close your mouth and stay silent. She gave you a quick tour of the house and handed you a piece of paper.

"This is the number for the office you can call if there's a problem. Normally someone will be here with you if the colonel can't be."

"I don't need a babysitter."

"It was the agreement with the doctor okay Edward." You sigh not liking the idea of a babysitter but even more opposed to the idea of pissing off the trigger happy lieutenant. She pulled a bottle out of her pocket and removed the lid, taking one of the large pills from the container.

"What's that?" You ask wearily. You aren't looking forward to what you know is going to be the answer.

"Please understand that you're still sick Ed. This was one of the major concerns the doctor had about releasing you, you could relapse if you aren't careful. You need to take these twice a day, once in the morning and once at night. If you end up getting an upset stomach make sure you eat something with it okay."

"No way Lieutenant! I _don't_ do pills." You throw your hands out in front of you trying to ward off the woman, "I seriously can't swallow them!" She went on pretending she didn't hear anything.

"They'll also make you feel a little drowsy so make sure that when you take it you still have some time to lie down if you need it."

"I'm not taking it. I refuse!"

"It's either this or I march you right back to the hospital," Hawkeye threatened. You frown, stuck. You aren't sure which to hate more, the hospital, pills, or the lieutenant. You take your lower lip into your mouth as the stare the lieutenant is giving you hardens. You look around the house, _Mustang's_ house and wonder if going back to the hospital would be the lesser of two evils. The smells of antibiotic and cleaner aren't at all pleasant and maybe here the colonel would stay out of your way. Fidgeting, you take the pill and hold your hand out silently asking for a glass of water. With a smirk the lieutenant grabs one for you. It takes almost five tries and two glasses of water but you finally get the disgusting thing down. The lieutenant pats your head and turns for the door.

"I knew you could do it Ed," She says while heading for the door, "I'll be back later." The door clicks shut and it registers in your mind how her tone sounded to you.

"Don't treat me like a child!" You scream as the car rolls down the street.


	3. Day One at Mustang's

**Chapter Three**

**Day one at Mustang's**

Your name is Edward Elric and you are presently in a less than desirable situation. The Second Lieutenant just left for the office and you are stuck in Mustang's home at a loss. You aren't sure what to do with yourself, just sitting around seems horribly boring and you know that if you left the house you would be chewed out for hours. You peak into the living room which you only got a peak at on the tour. There is a large window that lets the sunlight in warming the carpet beneath your feet. On the adjacent wall is a book shelf full of many interesting looking texts. The rest of the room is now invalid to you and you make a straight line for the books. You look through the titles and notice the first book you and Al ever read on the shelf. It seemed strange that Mustang would keep a beginners book when he was already a full-fledged alchemist but you had done some pretty strange things too you suppose. You finger the spine on the book wondering where exactly Alphonse was and what was being done to help him.

"It's not fair Al," you mumble to the empty space around you, "I should be out there looking for you or using the military to find you. Not stuck in the bastard's _house_ like I'm some sort of prisoner. I don't need to be babysat I've taken care of myself for years." You ignore the Al like voice in your head that tells you that if you didn't have your little brother by your side you probably would have been dead by some stupid accident years ago. You roughly reshelf the book and wipe your eyes, you then grab another book at random. You sit in the sunny area on the carpet and use your folded cloak as a pillow while you read. At some point you realize the pill must have taken effect because your eyes have run over the same line five times but you still haven't actually read the sentence. Giving up you place the book on the floor next to you and turn on your side. You fall asleep fifteen minutes before the Lieutenant and the Colonel arrive at the house.

"It figures he'd fall asleep on the floor rather than his own bed," Mustang says while looking at your sleeping figure. He drops his bag on the couch and touches the back of his hand to your forehead. You don't even register the touch in your sleep.

"Fever?" Hawkeye keeps her voice low to keep from waking you. Mustang shrugs his shoulders and picks up the book that you left on the floor, he then puts it back in its rightful place.

"He's probably been here for a while the sun has made him pretty warm." Mustang slips his arm underneath your neck and the other on the underside of your knees. He lifts you in a fluid motion and you are awake long enough to register blue and warmth. You turn your face into the source of such warmth and are out again, "Would you get the door Second Lieutenant?" Hawkeye quickly goes for your bedroom door and with a quiet click the door is open and the colonel slips inside with you while the lieutenant waits in the hall.

"Makes you wish he'd stay like this when he was awake doesn't it Colonel?" The lieutenant asks as you are placed on the bed. The colonel begins to remove your shoes and sweater as he smirks.

"I won't lie Lieutenant," the colonel started with a low voice, "having him this compliant everyday would be nice." The covers are pulled up to your chin and your sweater is placed on the desk in the room.

"I suppose we'll just have to get him some different clothing another day."

"Nonsense," the colonel closes the bedroom door behind him as he hands Hawkeye a slip of paper, "that's your budget. I trust you can get sensible clothing?"

"Yes sir," The lieutenant says quietly with a quick look at your door as she nods her head in respect to the colonel.

"You're dismissed then." The lieutenant hurries from the room as Mustang runs a hand through his hair wondering what he's going to do with you.

You wake up hours later confused. The last thing you remembered was falling asleep in the living room…with shoes…and your sweater. You didn't remember lying down in this guest bedroom with a soft pillow under your head and covers. You sit up and blink at the open doors of the closet. The inside of the closet is now full of clothing, you cock your head to the right wondering if that was far too many clothes. There is a light knock on your door and you turn your head to look in that direction as the colonel peaks in.

"Come on, you aren't missing a meal while you're here, it's dinner time." You push the covers toward your feet and rub your eyes. Your body feels ridiculously weak and your first few steps are a little shaky. You place the heel of your hand to your forehead as a nauseating dizziness takes over. You feel a strong grip on your elbow and it urges you to go backwards. The back of your legs hit the bed and you try for a graceful sit but your legs are shaking so badly that you end up falling into a sitting position half leaning against the colonel who has come to help you out.

"My head kills," you murmur with closed eyes. You feel a finger curl under your chin and tilt your head up making your neck ache in pain.

"Open your eyes." The order is soft but the command is still clear. You struggle to open your eyelids genuinely wanting to open them for the colonel. As soon as you manage to open them slightly they slam shut again after the assault of light makes them burn with pain.

"I can't," your voice is a horribly pathetic whimper that shakes even before it exits your mouth. You grip your head nearly pulling out your hair. Everything hurts, it feels like a vice is hooked on either side of your head and someone is just cranking the wheel making the pressure in your head rise continuously. The pain is still rising and you can hear every sound in the house every single one of those quiet noises makes the pain pulse on your brain. The pain starts to radiate down into your jaw and through your teeth. There's a large hand covering your own hand, trying to prevent you from pulling out the hair there. The pain is actually making you nauseated and the brief moment that you had your eyes open is still making pain stab behind your eyeballs.

"Edward, look at me," Mustang says unaware that his deep baritone voice is like needles to your ears. The pain shoots straight to your head.

"P-Please don't talk so loud," you're nearly begging him as the pain still continues to rise. Tears slip through your closed eyelids, "It hurts colonel." Your grip on your hair tightens as the pain continues to rise. It suddenly occurs to you that you may very well puke.

"Colonel…I think I'm going to throw up." You are amazed that the man could hear you; you were hardly speaking at the level of a whisper. The pounding in your head increases as the colonel tries to move you. Your legs are like cooked spaghetti and they don't support you. You can't find it in yourself to complain when you are lifted and carried to the bathroom. You find yourself bent over the toilet bowl puking just after you were brought into the bathroom. Your hair was pulled behind your shoulders and held there as you clutched the seat hurling your guts into the bowl with a sickening splash that had you heaving up stomach acid. The smell reaches your nose and goes straight to your stomach again making you puke once more before the dry heaves start. You feel yourself being pulled away from the toilet and a warm rag is dragged across your face.

"Edward do you think you can open your eyes?" The colonel speaks just below a whisper as he runs his hand through your hair. You shake your head aggravating the pain once more. You sob while clutching at your hair. You've never experienced something like this before you weren't even sure what was happening.

"It hurts," your voice is strained and broken. The colonel shushes you and manages to pull your hands away from your head. He clutches both wrists in one hand while the second cradles your body. He pulls you up and pins your hands between his chest and yours, probably so you wouldn't pull out anymore of your hair. He places one warm hand on the back of your head and you press your face into his chest still sobbing. It was only after several minutes passed that you begin to calm and you concentrate on the sound of the colonel's heartbeat. It's somehow soothing and it makes you feel tired as the pain recedes. Your breathing evens out and you can open your eyes without aggravating your head.

"Are you feeling better?" The colonel's voice is still soft and you appreciate that. You nod softly against his chest; your hair catches on one of the buttons on his shirt. The pressure around your hands loosens and you let them fall to the ground on either side of the colonel. You're now slumped against him and you're pretty sure there is drool drying on the side of your mouth. You feel heavy and like moving would be impossible. The colonel seems to understand this and doesn't try to move you off of him he only shifts so that he is in a more comfortable position.

"What happened?" You whisper afraid that the pain might come back.

"Have you ever had a migraine before this one?"

"A migraine? That's what it was? I didn't think it'd be so painful."

"It's one of those possible side effects from the medication. I'll take you to the doctor tomorrow to get a different prescription."

"I don't wanna go."

"It's either that or keep having the migraines."

"…"

"Thought so." Mustang readjusts himself again and you start to feel bad. You're probably making his legs go numb; you didn't realize how sprawled out in his lap you were, like a rag doll. Feebly, you sit up and roll to the side so you're leaning against the wall next to Mustang instead of on him. Your head feels full and the pressure still hasn't fully left. Your head lolls heavily on your neck and you scrub your face with your hands hoping to ease some of the pressure. It, of course, does nothing. Your head is turned to the right by warm fingers that pinch your chin in a firm grip. Mustang's dark eyes search your own as you blink in confusion.

"What?" Your tone is slightly snappy and a sharp look appears in those dark holes.

"Come on, dinner." He pulls you up by your elbow. Apparently he didn't find what he was looking for.

"I'm not hungry anymore," you answer while placing a hand on your stomach, which was still feeling a little uneasy.

"Eat something," you are sat at the table and a plate of food is placed in front of you followed by a glass of milk. You throw a glare at Mustang you were _not_ drinking that vile liquid.

"I'm not drinking it."

"Yes, you are actually. You're bones have become weak and you need to start getting them stronger."

"No way, I can't stomach that." You push the cup away and cross your arms looking defiantly at Mustang.

"Too bad." The cup was placed back in your reach and your irritation levels skyrocketed.

"You _know_ I don't drink that shit!" You can barely contain your irritation, "Why do you insist on making me miserable?!"

"Making you miserable Edward? Is that why you think we made this arrangement?"

"…" Your silence apparently spoke volumes to the colonel.

"The world is not out to get you Edward. This arrangement was made so that _you_ are kept safe!"

"I can take care of myself!" Your voice raises in pitch.

"Oh, _clearly_. Your malnutrition and your oh so _wise_ decision to just up and leave to _Drachma_ without telling anyone is a perfect example of how you can _take care of yourself_ ," the colonel is passing the borders of anger and into something that resembled being absolutely livid, "are you aware that we are _not_ on good terms with _Drachma_? We are only a hair pin away from breaking into war with them. The _last_ thing we needed was a _State Alchemist_ going over the border to do god knows what and to give the ENEMY the liability to start. A. War."

"I'm sure I had a good reason!" You nearly shout.

"Not to mention," apparently the colonel wasn't done with his rant, "while you were busy fucking around in an enemy country you _lost_ your little brother! Tell me Edward, does that sound like someone who can take care of themselves?" The jab at the loss of your brother struck deep in your heart. Without even thinking you raise a hand and slap the colonel. Immediately your right hand is twisted behind your back and your chin is shoved upward forcing your head against the colonel's chest in a very uncomfortable position and some of the pressure from earlier returns. Your raise your left hand and grip at the colonels hand trying to pry it away. You wish you had your automail it would have been seriously helpful.

"Let go," you're disgusted with the pain in your voice.

"And now you're attacking not only your appointed guardian but your superior officer. Brilliant Edward, I can see why they call you the alchemist of the century."

"Stop." Your voice cracks in the middle of the word and your eyes burn with tears. Luckily you are saved by a knocking at the door. You are released from the hold and the plate of food is shoved in your hands.

"Go to your room and eat something," the colonel says as the knocking starts again. You resist the urge to rub your arm and you glare at the man, " _go_." Reluctantly you go to your appointed room and close the door. You set the plate down on the nightstand next to the bed and go back to the door to listen. The voices are somewhat muffled but you are still able to make out that it is Lieutenant Colonel Hughes that came to the house.

"How's it going Roy?!" The Lieutenant Colonel is as exuberant as ever you note dryly while rubbing the sides of your head.

"He's in his room Hughes, no need to act." The colonel doesn't sound happy at all. Perhaps that's the reason Hughes hadn't brought out a picture of his precious daughter.

"I am serious, how are things going over here?" Hughes voice dropped into something that was like his interview voice but more casual.

"Not good." You hear Mustang sigh and you imagine that he's running a hand through his hair.

"What happened?"

"Nothing out of the ordinary, he's just as stubborn as I thought he'd be and I can't get him to do anything. We got into an argument and he slapped me."

"I'm assuming you retaliated," the brief silence suggested a head nod on Mustang's part, "You've been working for 36 straight hours Roy. It's no surprise that you're frustrated. I'm sure Ed's going through some hard times right now too. His brother is missing and he can't do anything about it Roy, he's hurting." You swipe ferociously at your eyes at the mention of Alphonse. The worst thing was that Hughes was right, you were hurting and the only thing that could make it better was finding Al. The only way you could do that was to research but you weren't even sure where to start looking. You move away from the door as the conversation continues.

The only possible lead you had on where to start would be that girl. You knew she wasn't comatose. She couldn't be after she was interacting with you, the influence of drugs meant nothing and you _know_ that she was aware. With your decision firmly in mind you eat as much of the food that you can stomach, you'll need the energy. You snag your boots and one of the jackets that was bought for you. Thankful for the one storey house, you open the window and start climbing out. You land softly on the grass and you quickly look around before throwing the hood of the black jacket over your bright hair. You carefully sneak around the car in the driveway and you start with a jog down the road. You could remember, despite your fatigue, the way to the hospital. It was going to be a long walk and you check over your shoulder a little paranoid. Upon seeing nothing suspicious you continue going forward. You make it half way down the road before there is a rough grip on your upper arm.

"Going somewhere?" You jump and turn to see the face of the Lieutenant colonel. You clench your jaw and stubbornly remain silent, "Just what are you trying to pull Ed? Doing stupid things like this, is only going to get you into trouble."

"I have to find Al."

"Where do you think you're going to look hmm? We are _trying_ to get information but it's hard. No one truly knows what Alphonse looks like and you have no memory of anything. It's not much to go off of." For some reason you find it hard to mention that this girl they brought back might know something. For some reason you can't work your mouth to say the words. The lieutenant colonel sighs and tugs on your arm nearly dragging you back to the house.

"Hughes, don't! I'll just crawl back in the window…" you are ignored, "Please! He's already mad!" Your stomach churns as you approach the door, you can already see Mustang's face shadowed and _pissed_. Hughes opens the door and sticks the upper half of his body in.

"Rooyyy!" He sings, "I'm taking Ed for a little bit so don't worry about him!" You peak around the man shocked. Mustang is blinking looking very confused as he glances back and forth between you and the closed bedroom door. Without waiting for a reply the lieutenant colonel closes the door and nearly tosses you into the back seat of the car.

"Not that I don't appreciate it but…why?" You question as you scratch the back of your head.

"Seatbelt," is all you get. You suppose you'll have to wait until you get wherever Hughes wants to go before you get some answers. You click your seatbelt into place. Fifteen minutes later a piece of warm cherry pie with vanilla ice cream and hot chocolate is set down in front of you. Hughes had yet to say anything to you. He pulled into the small diner and ordered for you then remained silent. Only after you've taken a few bites of the pie did he say anything.

"I'm going to be straight forward with you Edward," he said with a straight tone and face. You swallowed nearly choking on the pie, "What you just tried to do was incredibly stupid."

"But-," Hughes holds a hand up stopping you from saying anything else.

"I know you are worried for your brother, we all are but what do you think you're going to accomplish in your current state?"

"…What do you mean?"

"Your body is weak right now. You don't have a chance trying to fight for your brother let alone making another trip out to Drachma."

"No! You don't understand-,"

"Calm down and lower your voice, there are other people here." You feel a twinge of pain in your heart as the fatherly side shows itself. After you notice a few people looking your way you duck your head and concentrate on not yelling, "What don't I understand Ed?"

"I wasn't trying to go back to Drachma to find Al…"

"Then what were you trying to do?"

"…" You aren't sure if you should tell Hughes about the girl. There is something in your gut that is telling you that you shouldn't talk about her. There's a tugging that tells you, you have to remain secretive and protect her. You unconsciously scowl and clench your fists. You aren't even sure why you should feel like this, you don't have any memory of her so shouldn't that mean that you could say what you wanted? Perhaps she was the key to remembering. If you could remember things about her then maybe you could remember Al. Your stomach fills with excitement you know you have to be right. You can't take the energy coursing through your body sitting down. You quickly stand and start pacing gaining many looks and the concern of the Lieutenant colonel.

"Ed…Edward sit down."

"Take me to the hospital." Your demand takes the man by surprise.

"Are you feeling okay?"

"I need to talk to that girl."

"You can't…well she can't…" You shake your head ferociously disagreeing with him.

"I need to go. Just take me…or I'll walk." Hughes must have noticed that you weren't taking no for an answer because he nodded and pulled out enough bills to cover your food and tip. You hurry into the car and fidget in your seat, for some reason you are nervous. It seems like hours before you finally arrive at the hospital. You rush ahead, only to get pulled back by the collar of your jacket as Hughes asks for the room number.

"I apologize but visiting hours are over sir." You feel your eyebrow twitch and your brain rushes ahead as you think of what you could alchemize to get in the room. You aren't paying attention as Hughes makes something up about official business. She hesitates for a moment but gives the room number. It's all you need to start off again, only to be pulled back again.

"Calm down Ed." The words are whispered in your ear but you're too full of energy to realize that he was scolding you like a parent does to a child. All of that energy seems to vanish as soon as you step foot into the room. Your stomach fills with a nervous bundle and you suddenly feel sick. You pause in the doorway and Hughes nudges you in a little further so he can enter and close the door behind him. You swallow thickly thinking that this might not have been a good idea. Her face still seems unfamiliar and familiar at the same time but you seem incapable of going up to get a closer look.

"Are you okay?" Hughes must have noticed that the color drained from your face. You start to nod but you end up shaking your head anyway. There's a hand on your forehead but you can't seem to take your eyes off of the figure on the bed. Something felt wrong. The atmosphere was strange, like it was too tense.

"Would you wait outside?" Your voice is hoarse and your hands shake slightly.

"I don't think that's such a good idea Ed." You know that nothing is going to happen if he's in the room hovering over your shoulder and as much as your stomach is telling you to _get out already_ you can't. You _have_ to know, it would be the only way to get Al back.

"Please. I need you outside." You still haven't looked away from her pale face. Even as your chin is pulled in the direction of Hughes' face your eyes stay glued to her form.

"Look at me…Ed…" Hughes moves so he is standing in the way of your view. Only then to your eyes snap up to his in a quiet form of anger.

"Would you just wait outside! It's important!"

"I just want to make sure you aren't going to be sick or something Ed. You don't look so good."

"I'm fine!" You slap his hand away, "Just get out!" The look the lieutenant threw you seemed to say "watch your tone" but he didn't actually say the words. He sighs finally realizing he lost the moment he agreed to take you to the hospital.

"You yell for me if you need me got it." You nod; the knot is back in your stomach. He places a hand on your head for a moment before stepping outside. You sigh feeling the tension leave with him. The air seems more open and you can actually take steps toward her. Soon enough you are standing at her bed staring at her. Her face is so pale that you can see the blue veins underneath the skin running blood to the rest of her body. Her brown bangs are splashed with blue and they almost seem too long, if her eyes were open the hair would definitely be in her eyes. Her neck is just as pale as the face and it is smooth like someone of her age should have. Her right arm lies on the bed above the covers so the IV line isn't disrupted. You exhale then clear your throat; it's time for some answers.

"Who are you?" You demand. Only silence is your answer.

"Why do I feel like I know you?"

Silence.

"Where's my brother?"

Silence.

"Why did you tell me not to say anything in that tent in the desert?!" Your voice is raising.

Silence.

"Talk to me!" You nearly shout the words but you stop yourself, you don't want the lieutenant colonel coming in. Your eyes fill with angry tears, "Help me find him!" You reach out to touch the visible hand but you hesitate your hand hovers over hers.

"Why won't you talk to me?" your voice breaks and a tear falls from your eye and onto your hand where it rolls off and onto hers. You are about to pull your hand back when hers suddenly comes to life and snags your wrist. You scream at the shock and the one shot of pain up your arm that it caused.

"It's not time for me yet," her voice is soft and sad, "Al will be okay don't worry kay, you just gotta remember." Your wrist is released when you hear the door opening and Hughes yells something but you're already falling and the room is going dark.

* * *

You open your eyes and wipe away the watery residue that gathered from your rather large yawn. You shield your eyes from the sun that is shining down on you and you look around. Alphonse is next to you sitting in the sun, armor and all. You try to yell out to him but your voice won't come out. You try to touch him but you can't move your arms. There is a giggle to your left and your head turns that way.

"Don't worry just sit back and watch your memories." It's the girl that was supposed to be in the hospital! What did she mean by memories, was this a memory? What was happening? You hear yourself chuckle.

"What do you mean…" the last word must be her name but you can't hear it. She smiles softly and chuckles.

"Nothing, nothing." You chuckle affectionately and ruffle her hair she playfully pouts and pushes your hand away.

"Where have you been all this time…Brother hasn't told me anything." Her name is once again skittering away from your hearing. You scratch the back of your head as Alphonse voices his question and you chuckle nervously. The girl gently punches you in the shoulder and tsks while shaking her finger back and forth in a chiding manner.

"Ah mou, aniki you shouldn't keep secrets!"

"Coming from you," you grunt back. This time you really are punched. You rub your left arm and grin sheepishly.

"Well, where were you? We thought you died." Alphonse sounded so sad you just wanted to hug him. You glance down and are slightly shocked to see your own automail.

"I guess it has been a long time…" She glances into the sky and you feel that she is trying to work up the courage to answer. You place your hand on top of hers and she smiles still gazing at the clouds, "It was when you guys went to the river with Winry. Your mom was hanging up the clothes from that day to dry," You hear yourself cut her off.

"Just call her mom she won't mind." The girl shakes her head.

"I can't she was so much more than just a mom to me….she saved me from that hell I was in before."

"So you weren't legally adopted but you still stayed over a lot," Alphonse added.

"Not all the time besides I didn't want to burden your family anymore than I had to so I stayed out by the train station every so often. I made sure to come over when there was bad weather or when I got too cold." There was a silence for a moment and you tried hard to remember anyone else staying with you at home but you just couldn't.

"I guess this is a little off topic though…" Al said quietly after a moment. The girl laughed and nodded easily dispelling the uneasy aura.

"Anyway, you guys were off and Trish wasn't paying attention to me, I was still so young it was easy to trick me. I saw something over the hill and just as I got out of the line of sight of any adult I was snagged by a creeper."

You want to hear the rest you really do but something jerks you out of the situation and you are put into another. This one is darker and menacing. You are back in the inky blackness that you remember before waking up in the colonel's lap without any memories. You can already feel the anxiety in your stomach. You hear the same voice that came from the girl's throat while you were talking in the sun.

"Are you ready aniki?"

"Ready, is Al okay?"

"He's okay just tired."

"Alright let's do it." You feel the energy of a transmutation and a wild energy that seems to feed constantly into the circle.

"I'll keep it as painless as possible." You nod and watch in fascination as your automail starts to disappear at the fingers and real flesh starts to replace it, "Alright we are entering the self sustaining stage." The energy changes only slightly and the automail leg starts to disappear as well. There is suddenly a scream and the transmutation goes wild. Pain rips through your arm and leg and you scream the girls name.

"Chiyo!" You're panicking, she's not answering you back, "Damn it! CHIYO!" The little black monsters are chewing on the metal eating it away unable to touch the flesh that replaced it. Your nerves sung in pain and your limbs started trembling. You were unable to end the transmutation to help, you would bleed out in a matter of minutes.

"NO! Nii-chan! Let him go you-," Chiyo's voice suddenly cut off and you heard something crumple to the ground then suddenly you couldn't hear anything. You knew you were stuck in the realm of the gate until something brought you out.

**To be continued.**

**Notes:**

" **Ah mou," This can be translated as "Ah Jeeze, or Enough already"**

**Aniki is a respectful term for a big brother but can also be used for someone that you look up to.**

**Nii-chan or Nii-san is another term for big brother but is also used for boys that you are familiar with.**


	4. On the Road to Recovery

**Chapter Four**

**On the road to recovery**

The lingering darkness of what you originally thought was a dream is still hovering around as you start to come out of unconsciousness. You can still feel the tingling pain in your arm and leg and you wiggle your fingers to try and dispel the feeling. It does nothing and as you try to open your eyes you hear the sounds of soft voices. They don't sound particularly close but not so far away that would suggest a different room. Your body feels heavy again and for a moment you feel as if you're falling asleep once more. You are able to open your eyes to slits after 'waking up' once more. The voices sound agitated this time.

"What the _hell_ Hughes? You take him from the house to come here to see a comatose girl who may or may not be a suspect in whatever the hell this is?"

"Calm down Roy, clearly something happened, her vitals changed moments before Ed passed out."

"What does that mean?" The colonel sounded agitated.

"She must have woken up for a little bit. We won't know for sure until we can talk to Ed to figure out what happened." You hear the colonel give a sigh of frustration, "Why don't you go get some sleep Roy. It's been what, 46 hours now?" Your eyes start burning and tearing up until you have to close them. You have a hard time opening them back up. Suddenly the black figures, that you assume are from the gate, are back on your body eating away at it. You start to panic and you are suddenly thrust into consciousness. Immediately you see shadows crawling over the walls and your heart pounds in your chest. You try to lift your arms to protect yourself but they are shaky and you aren't strong enough to lift them. You hear the colonel's deep voice and you feel like you need his demanding presence in the room.

"C-," You stop yourself from calling to him, you're Edward Elric! You can handle a few shadows on the wall…It was probably nothing. Your right arm starts burning again as the shadows crawl across the walls and the sound of car tires scraping across wet pavement fills your ears sounding more like screeches. Okay, it's something now, you can't help it your heart is pounding and you can't stop your imagination. You knew it was irrational to feel such fear but it didn't stop you from feeling it.

"Colonel…" Your voice sounds terrible it's shaking and weak. You call for him once more, this time louder.

"Ed?" You see the colonel, looking ragged and tired, round the corner and come to the side of the bed that you're laying on, "What's wrong?" He must have picked up on the shakiness in your voice. Just having the commanding presence of a colonel in the room seemed to help. The shadows looked more like headlights from a car just passing by and the sound of tire on wet pavement sounded as it should.

"Where am I?"

"Your room, we were able to convince the hospital staff from keeping you. You've been out for a few hours."

"Oh…okay."

"What happened?" You scrub at your face now that you are able to lift your arms. You manage to sit up and you kick the blankets down to lower the heat surrounding you.

"I think I know her…"

"In what way?"

"I don't really know…I only got bits and pieces." The colonel sighs probably irritated and exhausted.

"Bits and pieces of _what_?"

"Memories…it had to be. They felt too real to be dreams." The colonel sits on the edge of your bed and drags a hand through his hair.

"Would you care to explain these memories?" You briefly go over them, rubbing your arm while you talk about the gate.

"What did it look like when you arrived colonel?" He sighs and looks at you.

"You were unconscious and so was she there seemed to be signs of a struggle and traces of alchemy that were steadily disappearing. The room was secured and after making sure that none of the circles in the room were active we secured you and the girl-,"

"Chiyo."

"What?"

"Her name is Chiyo."

"Why do you know that?"

"That's what I call her."

"Anyway, we secured you and _Chiyo_ and I sent Hawkeye out to scout to find Alphonse and to make sure that there weren't any enemy soldiers around before we headed out. We didn't end up finding Alphonse and we-,"

"Wait…you said circles…how many were there?"

" Five."

"Do you think you remember them well enough to draw them? Or even just the placement would be good."

"The placement was typical for a five circle use, one in the center and a square shape around it. The strange thing was the center circle. It used an octagonal shape; I've never seen one, only read about it. Typically something like that should be used with a medium in each surrounding circle. It was pretty clear that there weren't four mediums so we aren't sure how the circle was really used."

"No…you're right there was a medium but only one….which of the outer circles looked different from the others, even just slightly. It could be one symbol or a certain degree is different in a line."

"I couldn't tell you, we weren't paying as much attention to the circles as we were to the fact that Alphonse was missing and there were two unconscious kids in the room. According to what you remembered it sounded like someone kidnapped Al but left you and this mystery girl."

"Chiyo." You said again. You scratch your head, "Did someone take pictures? That's pretty typical right?"

"Furey had the camera."

"Okay, so we go talk to Furey." You try to swing your legs over the side of the bed but the colonel stops you.

"It's two in the morning. For now you should just go to sleep."

"The same should be said for you Roy." You look in the direction of the lieutenant colonels voice. He doesn't look too happy either and you wonder how long he's been standing there.

"Didn't your wife call earlier wondering when you'd be home?" The colonel sounds angry and the Lieutenant colonel looks the part of angry father. You shift uncomfortably and press your back against the wall. It seemed like things were about to get physical between them.

"Sleep tight Ed." Hughes smiles at you and you nod in return as the lieutenant colonel snags the colonel by the arm and pulls him out of the room. You fidget not really feeling tired but not wanting to get up and get in trouble again by the fatherly man. You hear footsteps coming toward your room after a few minutes and you hastily lay down not bothering with the covers, you didn't have time to snag them and make it look like you were sleeping by the time the person arrived in your room. The sounds stop outside of your room and you hear a sigh.

"You'll catch a cold like that kid." You don't move, you only focus on keeping your breathing even and light. The covers are pulled over you and tucked under your chin. Feigning being woken, you scrunch your eyes together and gaze up at the tall, messy haired figure.

"Hughes?" You mumble trying your damned hardest to sound sleepy.

"Go back to sleep Ed. Let the colonel sleep in tomorrow will ya? I'll send Havoc over in the morning."

"Will you have him bring the pictures?" The lieutenant colonel sighs but nods.

"Yeah, I can do that. Get some sleep." You nod and close your eyes again feigning light breathing a minute and a half a later. You keep the breathing up until he leaves the room and you hear the front door shut and click with the turning of the lock. Still not feeling tired you sit up wondering if it'd be wise to leave the house. Deciding against it you wait until you see Hughes' car leave the driveway and get a way's down the street before you venture into the colonel's kitchen. Feeling no guilt you take a swig of juice straight from the carton. You wipe your mouth with the back of your hand slightly surprised, the colonel didn't seem like an apple juice kind of man. You replace the jug and close the door to the fridge. Approaching the window in the kitchen you place your hand on the window surprised at how cold it was. The feeling seems familiar to you and you become dizzy when images force their way into your mind.

_You're standing at a window with your left hand on the glass, the right is automail. You look to your right and give a hesitant grin at Alphonse; once again you just want to hug him. Al nods in your direction and you clap your hands together preparing for the transmutation._

Then just like that you're back in the colonel's kitchen gasping for breath on the floor. Your hands are shaking and you're pretty sure you're going to be sick. You cough once and burp stomach acid and apple juice into your hand. Your whole body is starting to shudder and you can't help but wonder if this is what it's going to feel like every time you remember something. Without the strength to stand, you stay on the floor of the kitchen with slowly drying vomit in your hands until Havoc enters the house at six. You're sure he doesn't notice you on the floor because he goes straight to your room, you assume to check on your wellbeing. You aren't sure if you should call him over or just let him do as he pleases. You decide on the second, you still feel pretty drained.

"Shit," you hear the lieutenant curse. He wheels out of the room and heads towards the colonel's room when you cough, "Chief?"

"In the kitchen," you manage with only slight tremors in your voice.

"Ah shit Chief, what happened?" He grabs a rag when he see's you and you realize with vague embarrassment that there is drying vomit on your face. He wets the rag and wrings it out expecting you to say something. He drags the rag over your face and you snatch it from him with a scowl. You can wipe your own damn face, you aren't two. Havoc crosses his arms and raises an eyebrow as if to say, "Well?"

"Just a bad night." You don't look him in the eye when you say it and you know it's your downfall…well that and Havoc can pick apart any lie you tell him.

"Right. Care for the truth?"

"I can't explain it."

"Try." You wipe your hands off.

"I just remembered something pretty insignificant but…I don't know….I-I zoned out I guess. Like I wasn't _here,_ " you gesture to the kitchen, "Then I was and I couldn't get up." Havoc sighed and ran a hand through his already messy hair.

"You're right, you can't explain it." You scowl at him, "What did you remember?"

"Nothing important."

"You don't know that," he takes your chin in between his fingers and turns your head to the right, away from the cupboards you were leaning on.

"It was nothing, I was looking out a window," you say as you smack his hand away.

"Have you been here all night?"

"Why do you ask?" You try standing but your legs are still shaking. The lieutenant pulls you up and you lean on the counter.

"Your eyes are red and you aren't focusing on me, your limbs are shaking and you're taking an awfully long time to blink." You feel your eyebrow twitch; he could tell all that from looking at you for half a second?

"…."

"Well then you've made my job pretty easy." You look up at him in confusion.

"What?"

"I'm supposed to keep an eye on you; it'll be easy if you're tucked in bed."

"I've been sleeping for days already!" You protest even though your body feels like lead. You wanted to see the pictures.

"Believe it or not Chief we humans sleep every night for at least eight hours. Did you know that teenagers need more sleep than that? If you don't get ten or twelve hours of sleep you'll never grow," he shrugs like it's no big deal. You feel your hand tighten into a fist and your eyebrow twitches.

"Who the hell are you calling short you asshole?" You glare and your voice is hard but you don't have the energy to bring out a full-fledged rant. It still makes the lieutenant chuckle and he pulls you along the kitchen and through the living room then back into your room. You want to scream at him saying, "It's not funny," probably followed by a variety of beautifully colored words.

"Like I said, time for bed."

"I'm not tired…I want to see the pictures you brought." You try to stand your ground but the lieutenant is strong, he muscles you down into bed and throws the covers over your body, which is now giving up the fight for consciousness.

"Che, not tired my ass." You try to glare at him but your eyelids are already closing and you're drifting off. You are woken several hours later by the Lieutenant who has food in his hands.

"Sit up Chief, I got some take out." You somehow manage to sit up but upon smelling the greasy food, which would have normally had you slobbering, you crumple back against the wall. The churning in your stomach is back and you feel sticky.

"Ugh, I can't…" You groan. The lieutenant frowns and places the back of his hand on your forehead. You are able to muster up a glare but not much else.

"Your fever is back…Have you been taking that medication the doc gave the colonel?" You shake your head and his frown deepens, "Hang on I'll be right back." He's going to get the pills. He's going to get them and force you to take them like the second lieutenant did. You sink back under the covers and throw them over your head, a pathetic attempt to delay the inevitable.

"Noooo." You moan as you feel a gentle tugging on the blankets that you've tucked under your head.

"Chief…" the lieutenant is giving you a warning.

"I'm not taking it." Your stubborn streak seems to be back but your energy is nowhere to be seen. A jerk on the blankets later and there is suddenly cold air attacking your body. You toss your arms over your head, noticing briefly, that they are almost the same size.

"Take it willingly or not, either way it's going down." This really was the first time that you felt scared of the lieutenant, that voice held both a threat and a promise and you weren't sure what to think about it, "Seriously chief, man up." You uncover your face to glare at him and that's when the lieutenant stuck. He snagged your arms and twisted them, not quite painfully but not comfortably, behind your back, he then swung a leg over so he could sit on the bed behind you. With his other hand he gripped your jaw and then wrapped his other arm around your torso so your arms were pinned in between your back and his chest that was sort of painful.

"Ow, shit, let me go!" You twisted in the hold trying to dispel the uneasy feelings in your stomach and shoulders.

"Last chance chief, cooperate or I'll make you take the pill…"

"I can't!" Your heart is starting to pound in your chest when you realized that in your current state you wouldn't be able to get free. The lieutenant's hand moves away from your face and for a second you hope he realized how panicked you were. Your hope was crushed when you realized he was just reaching for the pill and a cup of water. He seems to think for a moment, he'll need both hands if he truly intended to force feed you that damn medicine and as soon as the arm that was forcing you to stay pinned against him left you would have free arms. He seemed to realize this and he moved his legs to be in pretzel formation to take the place of his arm. He squeezed your jaw open and popped the pill in. He then, as carefully as he could because at this point you were kicking and squirming, poured some of the water in your mouth. He placed his palm on the underside of your jaw and pinned your head against his chest too. You tried to turn your head to the side, it was hard to breathe now and you were still panicking. He held you still and you resist the urge to cough knowing it will only hurt you. You both sit in a stalemate for a while and the pill starts to disintegrate in your mouth.

"Come on chief just swallow and be done." Your jaw starts to tremble, you _can't_ swallow it! You need the water it won't go down if you don't have the rest of the water. It'll get stuck in your throat and you'll choke on it! You claw at the man's chest while trying to twist out of his grip, "It's _just_ a pill chief! Damn why are you being stubborn now?" The chalky taste of medication is starting to settle on your tongue and you slouch against the lieutenant. Your head is tilted too far up, you can't swallow like that. You gently push on the lieutenant's palm with your chin hoping he'll get the clue. You're fairly certain his eyes narrow in suspicion but he loosens the hold and still with a trembling jaw you swallow. The pill does catch in your throat and you start coughing. The lieutenant releases you and you go straight for the water. You down half the cup before there is a light pressure on the bottom tugging it down.

"Slower chief, you'll give yourself a stomach ache." The pill finally tumbles down your throat and into your stomach. You release your grip on the water and slump against the lieutenant in defeat. You had to give the man credit; he was a lot stronger than he looked.

"I hate you." You mumble after a few minutes of trying to catch your breath. Havoc surprises you by chuckling.

"I had a feeling you'd say that." You glare at him but he doesn't seem to notice. Your cheeks flush when you notice that you are practically sitting in the man's lap. You crawl off and try to crawl under the covers intent on going back to bed after your daily traumatic event. Havoc seemed to have other ideas; he grabbed you by your waist and pulled you out.

"Le'me go!" You grumble as you are dragged out from under the covers.

"You've gotta eat something with that pill."

"Ugh." The thought of the Chinese that he had brought in earlier made your stomach churn again, well it was either the thought of the food or the fact that Havoc had just slung you over his shoulder. It could have been either one really. Possibly a mixture of both. You are sat on the couch in the living room and the lieutenant goes into the kitchen. You curl up on the cushions as you hear the clicking of the gas stove and the clinking of a pot being set on the iron cover.

"There's Chinese colonel," Havoc said as the man entered the living room.

"Thanks Havoc," the colonel mumbled as he took a container and sat on the couch next to you.

"Sleep in your room FullMetal," the colonel says as he pokes you with his chopsticks. You glare at him.

"I _tried_ your lieutenant decided that I needed to be moved." The colonel frowns when he sees your face and for the second time that day someone has the back of their hand on your forehead. You scowl and slap the hand away earning a hard look and a glare.

"Have you been taking your medicine?"

"Yeah. I fucking took it." You are so irritated, all you want to do is sleep but these people are intent on making your life hell.

"How much sleep did you get FullMetal? You aren't normally this grumpy." You look back up and glare again.

"Are you saying I'm acting like this because I'm _tired_? That's ludicrous! I've done nothing _but_ sleep since I _fucking_ got here!"

"He apparently took it upon himself to have an all-nighter," Havoc answered as he walked into the room with a steaming bowl of _something_. He nudges you to sit up and with a glare you do as you're instructed. You are handed a bowl of soup and the lieutenant leans down to your ear and whispers so the colonel wouldn't be able to catch everything, "Eat it or I'll make you." You swallow meekly and you take a small bite of the soup finding that it went down fairly easy and it actually seemed to calm the churning in your stomach.

"Do I even want to know?" The colonel asked around a mouthful of orange chicken.

"No." You mumble.

"Depends do you like stories about stubborn teenagers who don't know what's good for them?" Havoc asks and Mustang sighs.

"One of those, huh." Havoc takes a seat between the two of you and nods. You sit in silence for a moment before you remember the pictures that Havoc was supposed to bring.

"Pictures, let me see them." You demand and the lieutenant sighs but pulls them out of his pocket after receiving a nod from the colonel. They are spread out on the coffee table and you set the soup aside, licking the broth off of your thumb as you settle down on the floor to study them. The one you are looking at is suddenly covered by a hand; you glare up at the colonel.

"Eat and look or you don't get to see." His coal eyes are set with seriousness and you roll your eyes but you pick the soup back up as you scan the photos to see what was different or alarming. You are searching for several minutes before you are reminded to keep eating. Absentmindedly you take a few mouthfuls before your attention is back on the photos. Finally you seem to spot it. You set the bowl down so you can pick up the pictures. You inspect the center circle which did indeed use an octagonal shape. In the center of that was the symbol for life. You stared at the pictures until it seemed to jump out at you. The circle on the upper left hand corner was different. All of the four outer circles had the sign known among alchemists as, "The art of Alchemy," which was the symbols for all four elements, earth, fire, air, and water put together. However in the center of the circle there seemed to be small lines etched in.

"Colonel do you have a magnifying glass?" You asked suddenly startling the man who was falling asleep on the couch.

"Yeah," He rubs his face and goes to grab one. You snatch it from his hand as soon as it enters your field of vision. You hover it over the circle and see what looks like the early picture of a phoenix.

"New life maybe…" you mumble to yourself, "Or perhaps being reborn into life which is what that center circle would be…" You became so wrapped up in the circle that you lost track of where you were exactly.

"What are you talking about Ed?"

"Al…Al come look at this…" You mumble not hearing the colonel who had looked over your shoulder at the paper. You don't see the shared look between the colonel and the lieutenant. You do however jump when a hand touches your shoulder and you realize exactly where you are and what you just said. Your cheeks color and you duck your face back down to look at the pictures. Your heart aches, you miss your brother so deeply it makes you want to crawl into bed and never come out.

"Ed…Maybe you should give it a break…"

"No…I'm okay its fine." You say while shrugging the colonel's hand off your shoulder. You decide to move off of that circle and you're moving the magnifying glass over the picture when it goes over the circle on the upper right. You take in a startled gasp of breath and you drop the magnifying glass and the picture. The glass shatters on the coffee table and you can't take your eyes off of the picture. Several things happen at that time, the lieutenant makes a sound of surprise and the colonel grabs you from under your armpits and pulls you onto the couch to prevent you from being cut.

"Ed…Ed…" There are fingers snapping in front of your face but you can't seem to focus on them. All you can see is the eyeball in the circle of that upper right hand circle. The symbol that you've seen on the gate when your body was taken from you and all of your knowledge given.

**I'm seriously sorry for the shortness of this chapter but something is better than nothing right?**

**Anyway I'M POSTING THE PICTURE OF THE TRANSMUTATION CIRCLE ON DEVIANT ART. It was a pain to make and I spent almost an hour on it so make sure you check it out.  OH ALSO, these chapters aren't being betaed…I don't have a beta right now and I'm shit at catching my grammatical errors so please be kind.**

**<http://koibitotedare.deviantart.com/art/Problematic-Teens-Transmutation-Circle-337345283> **

**Thanks for reading**

**Koibito~**


	5. Night Terrors

**Chapter 5**

**Night terrors**

Your hands are trembling and you aren't sure what you should be doing at that moment. The symbol for the gate was in the transmutation circle, did that mean the gate was summoned during the transmutation? It would have needed to be there to give your arm and leg back…and Al's body. The second lieutenant wasn't able to find anyone in the area, enemy or Alphonse, did that mean the gate took him and Chiyo was actually yelling at the black figures from the gate? Perhaps she wasn't attacked she just passed out because of the energy it cost to keep the transmutation going. You know she was a medium, she had to have been, your gut feelings never lie and this one was screaming at you. If the gate was summoned there had to be a price paid, that's how alchemy worked. Did that mean the price was…Alphonse? Was he sent to the other side of the gate as payment? You clench your fist and feel pain. It is then that you hear the voices and the gentle tugging on your wrist.

"Chief! Snap out of it," Havoc says right in your ear. Blinking you look down and see red. Panicked you jump and try to scramble back but a firm grip around your shoulders keeps you in place. The lieutenant's strong arm is keeping you sitting on the couch.

"W-what?" You find your voice escaping hoarsely and you look around. The colonel is pulling your hand back toward him by your wrist and he is holding a cotton ball to your wounded palm as he tries to mop up the blood on your hand.

"Are you with us now?" The colonel is looking in your eyes as he speaks and you can't help but stare back. With a slow nod you look around the colonel and notice that the magnifying glass you were holding earlier is in several pieces on the coffee table and the floor, "good, now stop clenching your fist it's messing me up." He is now wrapping the wound with gauze and you are half tempted to wiggle your fingers. You forget the urge as soon as you hear the pitter patter sound of rain on the windows. Distracted, you look out the window and allow the colonel to finish wrapping your hand.

"Strange, rain wasn't in the forecast today." The lieutenant says as you unfold your legs from under your thighs.

"Today is just an unusually warm day; it should be snow at this point." The colonel places your hand on your lap and starts to clean up the rest of the glass. You carefully step around it and go to stand at the window to watch the fat drops roll down the glass. Alphonse really did love the rain. He used to stand in it for hours and no matter what you said you couldn't get him in the house. Even your mom had problems getting him in once it started. He usually suffered from a cold the next day but he got over them quick enough. The rain was something you took away from him. Of all the things you robbed him of; the rain was one that you knew he missed the most. The weight on your heart was so heavy that you actually drew in a breath of pain and gripped the fabric of your shirt in the center of your chest.

"Chief?" You hear Havoc but the pain in your heart has become so acute you know you have to go do something for Alphonse. You turn on your heel and run for the front door ignoring both the colonel and the lieutenant. You run out into the middle of the yard and stand there with your head bowed. It is a disgrace to Alphonse who would always spread his arms out and look up to the sky with an open mouth hoping to catch drops of rain on his tongue. You ignore the tears streaming down your face, hoping they look like rain water. You are standing out here for Alphonse, who cannot feel the rain on his skin; you are standing out here in a miserable attempt to atone for your sins. You can't continue to disgrace Alphonse's love of the rain by bowing your head and crying. You wipe at your face and then lift it to the sky ignoring the touch on your shoulder; just like Al. You raise your arms to the sky and open your mouth. Just like Al.

"Chief…what are you doing? Get inside you're already sick!" There is a pressure on your right side that is trying to push you to the left but you resist it. Just. Like. Al. You grin and spin away from the drenched blonde man, _just like Al._

"What the hell has gotten into you?" The colonel's biting tone is racing through your ears. Unlike the lieutenant's words, which went in one ear and out the other, the colonel's words stay bouncing around in your mind, "Get the hell inside. Right. Now." You can feel mud and rain water soaking into your socks and there is a phantom ache on your right shoulder where your automail used to be, there is one on your left leg as well. Rain always made the ports ache. It was a reminder that you were Edward Elric and you couldn't atone for your sins like this. This was just wallowing in the regret and sorrow.

"I don't think he's listening boss." You almost laugh at Havoc, when did you ever listen?

"If you are going to act like a child I'll treat you like one Edward." You weren't sure what that was supposed to mean until the colonel started counting. He sounded just like your mother did when she was at the end of the line with Alphonse. Al would laugh and tear into the house at full speed and run to hide behind you so she couldn't get to him. You too laugh then turn on your heel when he reaches two. You race into the house and slip your way into the kitchen so you can drip on the tile flooring. You don't have anyone to hide behind; the lieutenant looks rather pissed at being drenched in rain water that was on the verge of being sleet. The colonel doesn't look happy as he grabs towels from the closet for the three of you.

You slip your socks off and race into the room that was given to you giggling madly. Alphonse enjoyed the cat and mouse game, you think it was because it gave your mother something other than your father to think about. Or perhaps it was because she was paying attention to just Alphonse instead of dividing her attention towards other people. You shut the door and push the lock in still giggling. You aren't sure why this is as much fun as it is but now you can see another reason why Al always did it. You lay on the wood floor still giggling as you lose yourself in memories.

_You stand with a pout of on your young face as your mother tries to dry Al off as he runs around the room. Al is grinning like he just won a contest and the laughing is starting to slow him down. You want to stick a leg out and trip him but part of you is weary of the consequences and the other part doesn't want to hurt the little brother you try to protect._

" _Alphonse! Come back here!" Even your mother can't keep the laugh from her voice. This is one of the only times that Al seems to be so happy._

" _Catch me! Catch meee!" The front door suddenly opens and a smile lights up on your face._

" _Chiyo! Good you came in!" You call as the small, brown haired girl comes in the door dripping on the tile in the entry way. Her appearance startles Al so much that he is easily caught in Trisha's grasp._

" _Edward be a dear and get Chiyo a towel."_

" _Okay." You chirp and run off to do that as Alphonse disappears behind a towel. You bring her the towel but something seems wrong, "You okay?" You ask her while trying to peer into her eyes which are looking down. She offers a smile and a nod while taking the towel._

" _Sorry Aniki, I'm just tired today."_

" _You didn't stay up all night again trying to protect your stuff again did you?" Al's voice is muffled by the towel._

" _I'll be okay." Trisha claps her hands and you look over at your mother._

" _Well then I guess we'd better get you a nice warm meal and a bed to sleep in." She wraps the towel around Al and moves to towel Chiyo off, "Edward will you grab a change of clothing and Alphonse you go change into your pajamas."_

" _M'kay!" You and Al both reply as the blue towel is rubbed over Chyio's head. After everyone was dry and in warm clothing your mother makes stew, a perfect meal for a rainy day you think. Those were some of your favorite days._

"Edward! Open the damn door." You suddenly feel miserable. You wouldn't be able to have those happy times again. Alphonse was gone and your mother dead. Those moments would stay in the past and they would never happen again. You curl up on the floor, tucking your legs up to your chest and your arms hugging them. There is a small 'chink' noise as the lock is undone and a pissed off colonel struts into the room. Your head is spinning now and you don't feel so good anymore. There is a dull throbbing pain on the left side of your head and you remember that the medication gives you migraines. There is now a firm grip on your upper arm that tugs you upwards and the spinning gets worse. It seemed that you got physically ill every time you had a memory…no not just memories, only memories with that girl in them. You used to think of that day all the time but she had never made an appearance. Something had always felt off but you thought it was because of how long ago it happened. Everything felt perfect when she walked through the door. How much of your childhood had your really forgotten…and why did you forget?

"Colonel?" Your voice is weak again.

"What?" The colonel snaps. You clutch the material of his sleeve feeling weak.

"Something's wrong..." Havoc mutters as he watches you from the door.

"I think I'm going to be sick," you mumble while leaning your forehead on his pectoral muscle. You hear the colonel asking Havoc to grab your medication while you are dragged out of your room. For the second time during your stay at Mustangs you find yourself bent over the toilet trying your damned hardest not to throw up.

"Stop holding back Edward," the colonel has caught on and still seems to be angry that he was still soaked in rain water, "You'll feel better if you just throw up." You shake your head refusing to be so helpless again.

"I got the pills boss…" Mustang looks at them while you swallow back down a baby barf.

"Mood swings aren't a listed side effect Edward care to tell me what the hell has gotten into you lately?"

"Really? That's a shocker almost all medications come with a risk of mood swings." Havoc takes the bottle to inspect the fine lining himself, "These are just the major ones…there should be a piece of paper that has a full list…" You tune him out as vomit rises in your throat, you are unable to force it back down and you gag as it splashes into the toilet water. A warm hand covers your forehead and pulls your bangs out of the way so you can retch freely. Tears bead at the corners of your eyes as more hot vomit burns your throat and coats the walls of the toilet. Again you choke on the smell and with nothing left in your stomach you gag and cough. You lay your warm cheek against the cool seat of the toilet panting and crying. Everything hurts at this point, your head, your throat, stomach, and even your bones all feel as if they have been personally assaulted.

"Come on, head up." The colonel speaks softly for the first time and he wipes your mouth and eyes with toilet paper. The toilet is flushed and you cover your face in the colonel's stomach embarrassed that Havoc had seen that. Your legs are like noodles and when the colonel tries to stand you up you are wobbly. You accept his arm still feeling overly warm and in pain. Each step seems to over strain your muscles and bones. You refuse the help of getting into your own pajamas and you shut both men out of the room while you wrestle with the clothing. It takes almost ten full minutes but you are finally dry and in warm clothing. The colonel comes back in after he hears that you've settled and he pulls your long hair out from underneath the night shirt.

"No more…" you whimper, "no more." You can't take the pills anymore, not if you feel like this every time. The colonel seems to understand because he nods while he sits behind you and snags the brush from the nightstand. You lean forward as he drags the brush through your hair. You know something is wrong when you aren't able to draw up the energy to snatch the brush away and do it yourself. Your body betrays you by relaxing and leaning forward. The colonel tries for a braid and he manages to make you feel sleepy while he runs his fingers through your wet locks. You almost never let anyone touch your hair because it made you so tired and relaxed. The colonel finally puts together a shitty braid but you are already half asleep and just as he figures out the hair tie you are already drifting in and out of consciousness. The colonel pulls you back and aligns your head with the pillow then pulls the blankets up and over your body. You are asleep before he even starts to tuck in the blankets.

* * *

"No I don't think we can make it out there…He's been out for almost a day now…Yes. When can you get someone out here?" You can hear the colonel talking in the living room. Due to the lack of a second voice you assume he is one the phone. He was probably talking about you too. Damn you were really out for a day? You weren't sure what to think of that until you cracked your eyes open and groaned in pain. Everything still hurt and on top of that you were sweating. You don't feel like you can sit up and push the covers down, so you let your leg fall off the side of the bed. One leg out always made a difference, even now. You cough, aggravating your already sore throat and you turn your head to the side to look at the clock. It is almost three pm and your head feels like it's full of lead and cotton balls.

"I think he just woke up…yes ma'am. Thank you…I'll be here." You assume the colonel hung up because it's quiet and there are footsteps headed your way. You close your eyes in a prolonged blink and when you open them again the colonel's hand is just about to cover your forehead.

"A day?" You croak. The colonel nods with a frown as he moves his hand down to cover your cheek.

"You're still feverish, how do you feel?"

"Sick."

"Can you handle some water?" You nod not wanting to use your voice and cause pain in your throat again. The colonel leaves and returns minutes later with a glass of water. You manage to sit against the wall and you sip at the water wincing as the first sip burns your throat. The next few are more manageable but still unpleasant.

"A doctor will be here soon," the colonel says and you wrinkle your nose at the thought of some stuffy doctor poking around, "I'll talk to him about the medication." You nod grateful that you wouldn't have to take the pills anymore.

"Thanks."

"Talk to me for a bit." You blink a little confused, you aren't really sure what he wants but you nod.

"About what?"

"Your little trip to the hospital." You wince wishing you didn't have to talk about something like this.

"Hughes took me fair and square!" You try to defend yourself but the colonel raises a hand.

"I know." Now you're really confused, "When you were in that room her vitals changed. Did she wake up?" You chuckle nervously.

"She's comatose Mustang." His stare doesn't move away from your shifty eyes. You were never told not to tell but something told you to keep quiet, "How does a comatose person talk?" Mustang sighs.

"I never said she talked Ed." You inhale quickly realizing the shit hole you just put yourself in.

"Errr."

"What did she say?"

"…"

"Edward…" You wince as the, 'I'm warning you" tone comes out.

"Nothing important."

"I need to know."

"No you don't."

"Why are you protecting her?" You freeze. Why _are_ you protecting her? Why were you having all of these urges to keep silent about her?

"I…I…"

"You can trust me Ed." The colonel actually sounded hurt…like he thought he had your trust and just lost it.

"I just…I…" You were starting to panic.

"Hey," he places a hand on your head, "It's okay calm down." You swallow hard and blink rapidly to keep the tears out of your eyes. Mustang had your back, you knew that. He hadn't ever led your wrong, he was a right ass sometimes but he hadn't ever run you in the wrong direction. He even came out to collect you from Drachma.

"She…she said that Al was okay." You hiccupped relieved that you were able to tell _somebody_.

"How would she know that Ed?" You shrug.

"I dunno but I believe her."

"What else did she say?"

"That it wasn't her time yet and that I needed to remember first."

"What isn't her time?"

"Maybe to be…awake? I don't really know."

"Did she specify what you needed to remember?" You fall into a coughing fit before you could answer and the colonel presses the water glass into your hand. After a few mouthfuls you are able to speak again.

"She didn't. She just said I needed to remember."

"Okay…thanks Ed." He places a hand on your sweaty forehead and frowns, "your fever is worse."

"I feel worse colonel." You rub your knuckles against your temple trying to relieve the headache there. The ringing doorbell cut off anything the colonel was about to say.

"That'll be the doctor." He patted your knee and left the room. You weren't entirely sure what to think when your teacher burst through the door as the colonel tried to, and failed to, keep her calm and quiet.

"What the HELL happened?" You swallow meekly trying to sink into the sheets.

"W-What do you mean teacher?" Your voice is just as meek as your swallow. She places her hands on her hips and _glares_.

"What the hell did you do to land yourself here?"

"Please calm down, he's sick." Mustang chimes in but it doesn't seem to help. The only thing that prevented your teacher from yelling at _him_ was because she spotted your right arm.

"How did you get your arm back? Is your leg the same now Edward?" You gulp at the cold glare.

"I…I don't know."

"You don't know?" You shake your head knowing that she's doubtful.

"I really don't…I seem to have lost all memory." Your coughing fit comes back and Mustang pushes your teacher aside so he can sit next to you and rub your back.

"Don't baby him. I want to know what he did."

"Well right now he's sick and in pain. If you want answer's you can wait until he's feeling better and willing to talk to you." The colonel throws her an even icier glare and she seems inclined to back off while you hack up a lung. You end up coughing so hard that it makes you burp up vomit. Mustang is quick, he grabs a bowl from the nightstand that must have been placed there while you were sleeping and he places it in your hands so you can vomit into it. Your teacher's looks softens.

"How long has he been like this?"

"Since we recovered him from Drachma." You know your teacher is itching to yell at you for being in Drachma but she is actually holding herself back as you puke your stomach into your bowl. The colonel is keeping your sweaty hair out of your face as you finish up and you are grateful for that. You wipe your mouth on the sleeve of your shirt earning a disgusted look from both adults. The colonel pours some water into a glass and your teacher tucks some hair behind her ear before she takes the bowl of disgusting shit from you and leaves to find the bathroom to flush it.

"I don't know if I can handle anymore water colonel…" You try to refuse but he pushes the glass into your hands anyway.

"Just a little bit, to get the taste out." You sigh and take a few sips; this does nothing for the churning in your stomach. The doorbell rings again and this time it really is the doctor. He enters the room at the same time as your teacher and the small room suddenly seems awfully crowded.

"Alright Mr. Elric let's take a look shall we?" You glare but don't have the energy to put up a fight. You allow him to take your temperature, which turned out to be an alarming 106.4F. He asks for ice and you aren't sure you like where this is going.

"Wait, wait ice? That doesn't sound too pleasant to me." You say trying to get the colonel, who doesn't give a shit, to stay. It doesn't work and he returns with individual baggies of the cold stuff. It's packed around your body and the one underneath your neck feels especially nice.

"You seem to be very underweight have your eating habits changed?"

"No." The doctor seems to think you're lying because he gives Mustang a look.

"Your immune system seems to be shot because of this weight loss which could be a cause for this level of illness."

"Could be?" your teacher questions. He sighs and takes your pulse as he responds.

"Without proper testing I couldn't tell you what was causing him to become this ill. He _should_ be placed in a clean room at the hospital but I'm going to try and grant your request to keep him out of a hospital Mr. Mustang."

"Thank you." Mustang answers. You're touched; Mustang asked to keep you out of the hospital because he knew you wouldn't like it. You offer him a faint smile.

"Have you been able to keep anything down lately?"

"I think I slept all day today but I'm pretty sure I ate some soup yesterday." You answer while scratching your head. You cough into your elbow feeling exhausted.

"You let him go all day without food? When he already looks like _that_?" Your teacher nearly shouts while gesturing to you. You look at your body, what was wrong with it? You were thinner than normal but you didn't think it was too bad…

"I tried to wake him up but, nothing I did woke him, which is one of the many reasons I called for a doctor." Mustang defended.

"Yes well, another reason I'm concerned is because he seems to have sustained several injuries and with his immune system as shot as it is right now, if any one of those became infected he could die."

"So I'll clean them out every day and I'll make sure he stays in bed," Mustang offered.

"If you are really so adamant on keeping him out of a hospital then you would need to get this whole house cleaned properly. I would recommend the clean room in the hospital though."

"We could try some trial days; if he doesn't get better within the first week then I'll take him straight away. If I notice anything getting worse I'll take him sooner."

"He can suck it up and go to a damn hospital." You've never felt like pleading and begging with your teacher before now but you did _not_ want to end up in a hospital.

"I don't want to go." You mumble. The doctor sighs and asks you to sit up, several ice bags fall and you relied on the colonel's help but you were sitting. He places the cold metal of the stethoscope underneath your shirt and behind your lungs and asks you to breathe deeply. You are unable to do so without coughing the first few times but eventually you can draw in a breath and hold it for a moment before releasing it. He allows you to lay back against the stack of pillows after he's done but he does check over the goose egg on your forehead.

"Alright, I'll clean out the wounds you have and I'll leave you with some antibiotics but you need to put weight on Major Elric. If anything even begins to look like it's getting worse I'm taking him into the hospital, legal guardian or _not_ Colonel Mustang I will not listen to your requests."

"I understand, thank you." Mustang answers as he puts a hand up to silence your teacher who is probably pretty pissed about this legal guardian shit. You know you are. Or…were? You weren't entirely sure what to think at this point. Mustang had been more than decent to you and he was even trying to keep you happy by keeping you out of a hospital. You flinch as your cheek burns with whatever cleaning shit the doc is using.

"Try to keep still Major." You nod and allow the doctor to do his job as Mustang packs the bags of ice around you again. You have to admit, save for the stinging of disinfectant, you're pretty comfortable. Before you know it you're dreaming.

_Screaming. That's the first thing you can hear was screaming. You run down the stairs trapped in the memory. You know you don't really want to remember this one. You're already feeling sick and you can't remember what's coming up, just that it's going to make you puke. You nearly trip over a stair but you catch yourself on the railing and jump down the last three. You take off the second your feet hit the ground. You turn the corner nearly running into the wall as you turn too hard. The screaming has stopped so you start opening doors. The first three are empty but on the fourth you freeze. Chiyo is laying on the ground covered in blood. She has been cut, and violated. Her breathing is labored and her skirt and shirt are torn._

_Unable to hold back you throw up on the stairs leading to her before you go to her. You try to staunch the bleeding with your hands but it's not doing much good. You're crying too hard to get out any useful words to her. You are hit on the back of the head with something hard and you fall on her. You see police officers running into the room and shouting freeze. You assume it's at the person who hit you. You hear them running then a bang from a gun and something hits the ground. Your stomach churns when you realize what just fell. The police officers are touching your shoulder._

_"Stay with me kid, what happened here?" They move you off of Chiyo so they can get medical attention to her._

_"Don't…don't hurt her." You mumble when you see her face scrunch up in pain as she is moved._

_"Focus on me kid, what's your name?" A police officer moves your head to look at him preventing you from seeing her, "your name." He repeats when you don't answer._

_"Edward…"_

_"Alright Edward how old are you?"_

_"Ten."_

You wake up with a short yelp and a hand on your forehead. The colonel's concerned face looming over you. You are panting and in the middle of a cold sweat. The blankets have been kicked off the bed and you, for some reason, are on top of them looking at both the bed and the colonel. Your hip hurts and you feel like you may have hurt it when you somehow ended up on the ground.

"Are you awake now?" You nod shakily grateful that he was speaking low and calm because you were feeling pretty jumpy.

"W-What time is it?" The colonel bends down and his popping knees make you jump.

"Almost one in the morning."

"Oh…."

"Do you suffer from night terrors often?"

"Night…terrors? No…they stopped when I was eleven…only lasted a year…" You mumble running your shaking hands through your hair, "Wait…I had a night terror? I haven't had one in years…are you sure?"

"Pretty sure Ed. I've dealt with soldiers that had Post Traumatic Stress Syndrome and night terrors were pretty common…"

"Oh…" Your heart was still pounding.

"Come on, stand up." Shakily you stand gripping the colonel's sleeve. Your whole body is still shaking and extremely jumpy. You can't bring yourself to let go of the colonel's sleeve and he doesn't try to force you. Instead he moves slowly and lays the covers back out on your bed then pulls them down. You shake your head; you don't want to go back to sleep you can still see Chyio's bloody and violated form every time you blink.

"Colonel…I can't…" You're still shaking and you can't seem to stop.

"Come on." The colonel says softly as he leads you out of the room and into the living room, "Do you want to take a bath?" You shake your head and tighten your grip on his sleeve.

"I…don't wanna be 'lone." You mumble with red cheeks.

"Okay, pick one." He holds out three cases.

"What are they?"

"Movies."

"Movies?" Mustang sighs and then smirks.

"Of course you wouldn't have heard of movies. I know it's new an all Ed but they have been out for a while. Military personnel get first pick you know." You blink; they must go along with that new television thing that everyone was talking about. You selected on and the colonel put it in the player. He grabbed a blanket for you and you sat on the couch next to him still gripping the sleeve of his white shirt. You realize his plan moments too late. The movie flickered silently and there was a lot of reading that had to be done to get what was happening. Your tired eyes couldn't follow and you knew the colonel was plotting to get you to fall asleep when he pulled you down so your head was cradled in his lap. You were losing the battle and when the blanket was tucked under your chin you fell asleep feeling secure by the colonel's warmth.

_"Chiyo! Chiyo are you okay?" Your voice sounded so young and scared. You were trying to get out of the police officers grip when they began to move her._

_"Calm down buddy. It's okay you are safe now, she's going to get some help okay. Do you see that man there?" He pointed to the man in white clothing with a red cross on his chest._

_"Y-Yeah…" You sniffed trying not to cry. Your head still hurt from the hit and you were scared. You shouldn't have ran from home…Al would be worried and Winry…_

_"He's a doctor, he's going to help her and then we're going to help you okay."_

_"I'm okay."_

_"You're a strong kid there Ed…"_

_"I wanna see her…"_

_"That's probably not a good idea right now."_

_"No I want to!" You manage to squirm and wiggle your way out of his grip but you land facing away from Chiyo and you end up seeing the dead man that had previously hit your head. He was lying face down with blood_ everywhere _. Unable to help yourself you scream startling the other people there. The officer that lost his grip on you grabs you again and you bury your face in his shoulder shaking and trying not to puke again._

You jerk awake as you scream again and fight off the blankets that are covering you. You're lying on your bed again and you realize that Mustang had probably put you there after you fell asleep. The colonel rushes in and sees you fighting with the cotton sheets and he sighs. He pulls them off of you and places a hand on your cheek which is pale and cold.

"Calm down…you're okay." Your crying and hiccupping now and clinging again to the colonel's shirt, "Do you want to talk about it?"

"No!" You shake your head hard and you push your face into his shoulder trying to forget. It was easier with the colonel there. You felt safer and you knew that he would protect you. He let you gain control of your breathing before he spoke again, this time his hand was on the back of your head.

"You should try to get some more sleep okay Ed…I know you don't want to but you should try one more time okay….It's only three and you _need_ to rest up."

"…Where's teacher?"

"She left with the doctor…"

"…Why?"

"She got sick…" You heart pounds in your chest and you clutch the shirt.

"Is she okay?"

"Yes, they called."

"Good."

"Don't change the subject okay, come on lay back." You follow the hands leaning you back but as soon as the colonel tries to rise you tug on his shirt.

"Don't go…please….don't go…"

"Ed…"

"I'm scared…" Your heart drops in your stomach when you realize that he really might just leave.

"Alright…Come on scoot over." You scoot to the right side of the bed so Mustang and lay on the left. He covers you both up and you press your face into his chest. He shifts awkwardly and hesitantly brings his hand to rest on your head. You're asleep in seconds, the colonel is asleep in minutes.

**As always thanks for reading,**

**Koibito~**


	6. Bringing in the Team

**Bring in the Team**

**Chapter 6**

You wake up feeling warm and rested. With flushed cheeks you remember exactly  _how_  you fell asleep the previous night and as you hear a bird chirping you lift your head up. The colonel is still sleeping with a hand still placed on your head. You clear your throat, which is less sore than the previous night, and wiggle away from the colonel accidentally waking him up. He sighs and looks through squinted eyes at you. He blinks lethargically before he snags your wrist and pulls you back to the spot you were previously occupying. He releases your arm and sits up.

"You can sleep." He runs a hand through his hair and stands up.

"I'm not really that tired…" You answer meekly, embarrassed. He turns his neck to look over his shoulder at you.

"Come on then you have medication and breakfast to take." You press your lips together and contemplate. The pills sound like something you would like to avoid even if they are something new that the doctor gave you. On the other hand your stomach is actually growling for the first time since you woke up in Drachma and you actually have some energy. You scratch your head and get out of the warm bed, which has several baggies full of water from the previous night. You then follow the colonel to the kitchen. You sit on one of the barstools at the elongated able that was attached to the wall and lay your head on the counter enjoying the cool feeling on your forehead.

"Head up." The colonel places two glasses of water and a baby blue colored pill in front of you. You wrinkle your nose but the look the colonel gives you has you taking the pill and after a moment of hesitation, popping into your mouth. It takes a glass and a half of water before you can get it down but you somehow manage. The colonel makes toast and brings it around the table and stands next to you as he puts the plate in front of you as well as some butter. You jump when you feel a sharp prick in your shoulder and when you look over the colonel is taking away a needle.

"The  _hell_  is THAT?" You nearly jump back but the grip on your arm keeps you on the barstool. The colonel places a cotton ball over the small prick and tapes it down with a Band-Aid that he seemed to have produced from nowhere.

"Medication," was the vague answer.

"I just took some! I didn't need that!"

"Calm down Edward. You're very sick you'll need more than just a pill."

"Well if you think I'm going to let you stick me with that again you're wrong!"

"We'll see." The colonel said as he put the used needle in a plastic box. You glared at him as he placed more bread in the two slot toaster and pushed the lever down. The colonel pointed to your toast then turned toward the coffee machine. You grit your teeth but buttered the toast anyway. You had just taken your first bite when the doorbell rang and the door opened swiftly after that. Your head swiveled in the direction of the door and the toast went down painfully after you realized that your teacher had returned.

"T-Teacher…You're back…" Her sharp gaze roamed over you looking at the bandages the doctor had wrapped you with and she crossed her arms then kicked the door shut. Mustang began brewing the coffee while keeping an eye on Izumi.

"Would you like some coffee Mrs. Curtis?" He asked as he grabbed a mug.

"No thank you."

"…What…what are you doing here teacher?" Her sharp gaze fixed on you again.

"Winry called me."

"She did?" Now you were confused there seemed to be no reason for Winry to call…

"You were supposed to go to Risembool last weekend and visit your mother's grave with her. She said that she had even confirmed the meeting with you." You froze, toast halfway to your mouth. That was right, you were supposed to go to Risembool to visit the Rockbell's and your mother's grave.

"…I…I…Something came up." You ducked to hide behind your bangs.

"I see that. Care to tell me what happened?" She took a seat next to you and accepted the plate of toast the colonel placed in front of her. You blinked in shock, where was the hitting the beating? Where was the rant for doing something stupid?

"I wish I could tell you…"

"What does that mean?" Izumi's hard glare turned to Mustang and you nearly held your hands up in defense.

"No…nothing like that," you say quickly, "I just can't seem to remember anything…"

"And why is that?"

"Bump on the head…" You mumble quietly. You suspect that she knows that you're holding back but she merely takes a bite of toast and nods. Mustang pours his coffee and a glass of orange juice which he places in front of you.

"Rotate your arm for a bit Ed, if you don't it'll stiffen up," Mustang says then turns to your teacher, "What can I get for you to drink?"

"Milk would be lovely," She says as she eyes you while you rotate your left arm a bit to keep the tension out. One of the many down sides to having a shot.

"...I trust you'll take good care of him?" You blink and stop rotating your arm. It sounded as if she was just going to give you up to the colonel.

"Yes ma'am." Mustang says as he butters his own toast, "It's not like he can do it himself." You scowl and are about to argue with him that you can damn well take care of yourself when your teacher starts to laugh.

"For a damned dog of the military you certainly have a sense of humor." You gape in horror at your teacher. She of all people is being pulled in by Mustang's charm.  _Really_? Your right eye twitches. Mustang smiles and bows his head in acknowledgment.

"Thank you." You narrow your eyes as you realize just how cautious Mustang is being. He was purposely dancing around her comments and speaking very politely. He knew how dangerous this woman was and you had to admit that you were sort of… _kind_   _of_ ….just a  _little_  impressed.

"So what were you doing in Drachma Edward?" You flinch again, that icy glare was focused on you and Mustang seemed to escape its wrath.

"I-I told you Teacher, I don't know…I really can't remember." You held your ground as the glare worsened knowing that it was crucial to not break eye contact while she was trying to determine if you were telling the truth or not. You seemed to have passed because she  _finally_  turned the glare onto Mustang.

"You better hold to your word and take good care of him. If I find out that he's missing meals then I'll personally drag him to a hospital to be properly taken care of."

"As I told you last night, I intend to fill out my responsibilities as his guardian to my fullest." Last night? So that's why things were going so well, they had already talked after you fell asleep the previous night.

"And I told you, that while I think it was  _nice_  and all that you stood up to me, don't do it again. This is  _my_  student-,"

"And  _my_  subordinate," Mustang interrupted, "I know you don't think too kindly of the military but I've already made it clear to you that I take care of my people." For some reason you felt like you were a child stuck in between a fight between spouses. The thought of the colonel and your teacher being married sent shivers through your body. The world would end before that  _ever_  happened. The air became tenser and for a moment you thought a fight was going to start.

"Then I expect a phone call every week. You better tell me exactly what is going on because I don't trust him" here she pointed at you, "to tell me the truth about how sick he really is. Now I will help you get this house clean enough to house him and then I have to get back to the shop. I expect you to phone me at six every Friday evening."

"I will do my best to keep you informed." Both adults were glaring now and it seemed a silent, mutual agreement was met and they both stood then simultaneously glared at you.

"Eat Edward," they both ordered and you immediately took a bite of the now cool toast. You finished off the crunchy pieces of bread as the colonel called in his crew to help clean house, he then went to shower.

Your energy seemed to be gone by the time the soldiers arrived and you were back to feeling pretty crappy. They started with your room and all the furniture was being moved out so they could get every space and every inch clean. You were strictly banned from helping at all and you occasionally saw flashes of alchemy, no doubt from your teacher who was determined to get every particle of dirt. You were currently bunked out on your bed, which was now in the living room and you were poking the baggies, which were full of ice the previous night but melted, to entertain yourself. Yawning once, you pressed your face into the pillow beneath your head and nodded off.

_You're standing at a window with your left hand on the glass, the right is automail. You look to your right and give a hesitant grin at Alphonse; once again you just want to hug him. Al nods in your direction and you clap your hands together preparing for the transmutation. You melt the glass around your automail encasing it. You both move at once intending to mow down any Drachmanians that stood in your way of getting to your goal. You see a quick movement and punch the first Drachmanian with your glass encased automail. Alphonse has the other two and you see a quick movement of gold. You act quickly and punch it to the ground, then hit it again._

_"Brother! Stop! It's dad!" You hit him once more as the old man grabs your flesh fist and rubs his cheek as he glares at you._

_"Whoops." You say dryly._

_"Shut up and go Edward," Hohenheim is apparently in no mood to deal with you, "Or did you want to let your sister sit in there any longer?" You grit your teeth, he would only call Chiyo your sister when he wanted you to move and do something quickly. You moved away from him and you removed the glass from your automail via alchemy. Hohenheim breaks down the door and the three of you move in and take down the few guards in the room. You are panting at this point, your breath visible in the cold air. You locate Chiyo and you use alchemy to remove the shackles around her ankles._

_"Chiyo! Wake up." You shake her shoulder but she doesn't stir. Hohenheim scoops her up and he turns on his heel._

_"Come on boys, keep up." You grit your teeth wanting to hit him again but you push the temptation down and follow him out of the room, "I'll take Chiyo back to the base and you two_ stay there _and wake her up. I'm going to take care of the Drachmanians in this area to keep the casualties down. I'll come back for you when I'm done._ Do NOT _start the transmutation without me."_

_"Okay dad," Alphonse answers sweetly. You clench your cold fists and try to keep your shivers down. Hohenheim seems to notice anyway._

_"Keep a blanket on your brother and sister Alphonse they'll freeze if you don't." The metal helmet dipped forward as Al nodded. You scoffed wishing that you didn't need your father for the transmutation so you could beat him until he bled._

"Chief….He...y…"

_"Shut up old man," you grumble trying not to let your teeth chatter._

"Chief…wake up…" You register Havoc's voice and you try to force yourself back into the memory but it's too late, you're waking up. You are covered in a light sweat again and your limbs are shaking. You were back in your room which was looking very clean…the sheets and comforter had been cleaned and you were even in different clothing. You blushed when you realized that someone had to of changed you while you were out. You blinked and looked over to Havoc about to ask him what he wanted when you realized exactly what it was that you had just remembered. You shot out of bed startling the lieutenant and on dizzy feet you ran from the room in search of the colonel, who wasn't there.

"Wh-Where's Mustang?" You asked as the black dots that normally came with sitting up too fast invaded your vision. You placed the palm of your hand on the wall beside you to keep your balance.

"He's getting the food, it's time for lunch. You okay there chief?" You feel Havoc's hand on your shoulder and your vision is starting to come back but the dizziness isn't easing off.

"My teacher?" You ask feeling a little breathless.

"With him…sit down kid you look like you're about to pass out." Havoc pushes you down onto the couch and someone presses a glass into your hand. You eye the water but take a sip anyway. It makes you feel cold and you start shivering. Havoc snaps at Breda to get his attention then points to your room. He goes in and comes back with the blanket from your bed, still warm from when you used it. You place the glass on the armrest and accept the blanket.

"I need to talk to him."

"The colonel?" Falman asks. You nod.

"I think he'll be back soon with Lieutenant Hawkeye and your teacher," Fuery adds in as he places a stack of books on the coffee table.

"Did you remember something?" Havoc asks. You nod and your leg starts bouncing in impatience and anxiousness.

"Calm down, you can talk to us about it you know."

"No." You shake your head almost violently; you can  _only_  talk to the colonel. You don't think you could tell the others as easily. They all shared a look but you ignored them as you tried to burn holes in the door with your stare.

"…Alright well we still need to make sure your wounds aren't infected and we should fix up those bandages. They came loose while you were sleeping." You were strangely irritated and you did  _not_  want them  _'fixing'_  your bandages.

"Don't touch me." You tightened the blanket around your body when Havoc tried to get to the loose bandage around your neck. The soldiers shifted not sure how to deal with you and you ignored them intent on waiting for the colonel.

"Hey now, the colonel gave us a job to do before he got back and we intend to do it." Breda cracked his knuckles and your glare snapped to his face. If looks could kill…well Breda would be at least paralyzed at that point, "you don't have to like it but it needs to get done."

"Go fuck yourself," You spat, honestly you couldn't pinpoint your rage but you felt so irritated that the colonel wasn't there and you just wanted to be left.  _Alone._  Hell if they hadn't of woken you up maybe you could have gotten to see more of the memory.

"Criminy someone woke up on the wrong side of the bed," Falman said.

"Calm down for a minute chief, if your wounds get infected you'll just have to go straight back to the hospital."

"Then we'll have wasted hours cleaning this place for nothing." You notice Havoc glare at Breda, and for a good reason, Breda's voice was just pissing you off.

"Shut up."

"Whatever we can do this the easy way or the hard way kid." Breda was threatening you and you knew that it only pissed you off more. You tightened the blanket around yourself and he shrugged, "hard way it is." Before anyone could stop him Breda was grabbing the blanket and trying to wrestle it away from you. The others jumped in trying to either help him or you, you weren't entirely sure at first. However once the blanket was out of the way you could feel the bandages being unwound and you struggled, impressively for yourself. You realized a few moments too late just how futile this fight was, the four of them easily overpowered your weak body and tired mind. Next you knew Havoc, Falman, and Breda were managing to hold you down while Fuery tried to apply the triple antibiotic ointment to your many wounds.

"Sorry Ed, I'm sure it's cold…" He was apologizing which seemed to add fuel to your raging temper. You were damn near growling at them while you struggled in their grips. Havoc was doing a frightfully good job of keeping your hands away from each other so alchemy was out of the question and you were too weak to fight them off. So it seemed your only choice was to yell profanities at the top of your lungs. You had to stop every few minutes to cough due to the aggravation in your throat but the yelling made you feel better. This was how the colonel, the second lieutenant and your teacher found you.

"What the  _hell_  is going on here?" The colonel sounded pissed…you think. You couldn't really hear over the sound of your yelling.

"Asshole! That hurts!" You yelled after Fuery had dipped a finger a bit too harshly into your skin.

"Maybe if you would just lie  _still_  it wouldn't hurt," Breda countered.

" _You_  fucking ambushed me!" You screamed then had to cough.

"Alright break it up!" The second Lieutenant nearly interrupted your teacher who had opened her mouth to speak. The other men, mostly in fear of the ever present gun, moved away from you.

"I'll leave them to you Second Lieutenant," Mustang said as he handed his paper brown bag to your teacher, "May I leave you with these?" She nodded curious as to what he was going to do. You scrambled to a sitting position with your bare back against the couch trying to locate your shirt which had been thrown off during the fight.

"Yes, sir," Hawkeye answered him with a dangerous glint in her eye.

"Come on Ed," the colonel motioned with his finger for you to follow him as your teacher watched out of the corner of her eye while she placed the food on the counter. You stood and followed him into your bedroom. You closed the door wanting to keep your privacy from the other men with colored cheeks. The colonel's current disapproving stare made you realize just how stupid that whole fight was.

"They started it," you mumbled.

"Oh I'm sure they did." Mustang clearly did not believe you, "sit." You did as you were told and you sat on the edge of your bed while Mustang gently applied the ointment. You shifted uncomfortably.

"…I remembered something."

"Oh?"

"….My…Hohenheim was there with us. In Drachma I mean. I don't really know why…I was woken up before I could see it completely."

"What happened?" Mustang asked as he capped the ointment and wiped the access off on his jeans. He snagged some bandages from a plastic, three drawer tower that seemed to hold some medical supplies. You told him the events of the memory while he wrapped the bandages around your torso.

"That's all I got before Havoc woke me up."

"Do you know why you would need Hohenheim there?"

"…No. I think that if I could just remember the rest of it then I would be able to know why…but for some reason I just…can't think of the reason," You're frustrated that you can't recall the rest of the memory but you were woken up before you could, "Maybe I need some sort of a trigger? The first time I saw the first part of the memory I just had my hand on the window…it was cold and I was just in a fight…maybe if I go stand outside or something it'll come to me!"

"No. Don't be ridiculous Edward. Not only are you sick but that's not going to work. You're thinking about it too hard at this point. All we can do right now is get some food in you and get you better. Then we'll figure everything else out."

"What about Al?! I  _have_  to find him and this might be my only chance!" You flipped around to face the colonel so you could properly glare at him.

"You said so yourself Ed. You trust this girl and if she says that Al's okay then he's okay." Now you were stuck, damn Mustang and his logic. He stuck a bandage on your cheek where a large scratch was and then handed you a shirt, "I'll do my best to track down Hohenheim but you already know that we've been searching for him for years and we've got nothing so I'm not going to make any promises to find him soon but we  _will_  find him." You sighed but nodded as you pulled your messy braid from underneath your shirt.

"Yeah…okay." The colonel rotated his finger in a quick two circle motion with his fingers to the ground. You spun back around and he undid your braid, "I can do-,"

"Now," the colonel cut you off as he snagged a brush and began to untangle your hair, "you'll eat and then take a shower. Anything before that is non-negotiable and doing those things are non-negotiable. What you do after is up to you depending on how you feel."

"Kay." Those damned fingers were making you feel tired and compliable again. You can't help but wonder when, in the short time that you were at Mustangs that you began to trust him so much.

"Also, you need to keep your temper in check. I know you're getting frustrated with not being able to remember and not having your brother here but you can't fight us every step of the way. If that whole fight was really about what I think it was about then you need to calm down and let them help you too."

"Do you always to give out orders as advice or is it just a bad habit?"

"Who said I was giving you orders?"

"Since when do you give out advice?"

"Who said it was advice?"

"…Then what was it?" you blinked in confusion.

"A request Edward," the colonel said as he pulled your hair back into a pony tail, it was after all much easier than a braid, "I'm asking you to cooperate and calm down."

"Oh…" For some reason you felt inclined to be 'better behaved' now that it was a request. You're sure that must have been one of the things that pissed you off so badly. Breda wasn't giving you a choice and it made you feel cornered. When in the  _hell_  did Mustang of all people get so good at reading you? The man sighed and stood after finally getting the hair tie thing figured out.

"Well I must say I'm impressed Ed."

"Impressed?"

"I can't believe you lasted longer than thirty minutes with your teacher, just picking up food nearly drove me mad!" You couldn't help it, you started laughing.

"Just try training with her colonel! I don't think you would survive!" You clutched your stomach and laughed so hard that it made you go into a coughing fit.

"Brat." He flicked the back of your head but there was a chuckle in his voice, "Calm down before you hack up a lung." The fit ended and you rubbed your sore throat still smiling.

"I'm fine," you said with a large grin. The colonel snorted in disbelief.

"Come on, your soup will get cold if you don't get it soon."

"Yeah, Yeah."

* * *

The soldiers had gone home and your teacher, after many reminders to the colonel that he was supposed to call every Friday, had left for Dublith. The colonel had sent you to bed hours ago and for a while you did sleep but you kept having that horrible memory resurface every time you close your eyes. You could only see Chiyo broken and dying so many times before you refused to sleep. You could still hear the colonel in the other room doing paperwork so you didn't dare leave the room to get a drink. You had already exhausted the pitcher on the nightstand by rubbing it on your face, you were getting hot.

You sighed and stared at the passing shadows on the wall wishing that you could think about something else. You blinked, you saw her face, you forced your eyes to stay open until they watered and you were forced to blink again. You were going to be sick. You snagged the bowl by your bedside and waited. It never came but your stomach continued to churn. After a few moments the urge passed. You close your eyes again just for a moment, just to make the burning sensation go away and you're suddenly trapped in the memory again.

You run into the room and she's laying there barely breathing. The memory starts to change and morph into a night terror. She's hanging from the ceiling fan by a single rope, she rotates with it. You are seeing the man that took her violate her. She's screaming at you to help. She's crying. You're crying. You can't do anything. You're stuck. You're letting it happen. She's splattered across the wall no longer recognizable as a human. She's being shot, she's being strangled, she's dying. You're watching. You're crying. You're dying. She's dead. You're saved. She's dead. She's smiling. She's stabbed. She's dead. Dead.

You jolt awake and you sit up with quivering hands and feet. You must have been fairly quiet that time because you could still hear the colonel scratching on a piece of paper with his pen. You stand up and pace the room trying not to think. You walk in front of the window, then the desk. You place your hands behind your head and you try to calm your racing heart and shaking body. Everything is shaking; even the breath you exhale is choppy. You don't think you'll be going back to sleep anytime soon. You're so tired though.

You hear the pen the colonel is using drop to the wood coffee table. You exhale a shuddery breath again. The colonel helped prevent the night terrors last time. You felt safe with him before…would it work again? You cross in front of the window again. You shift your weight as you hear the colonel getting up and going somewhere. He returns a few minutes later, you know because you can hear the scratching of the pen in his hand. You bite your lower lip and look at the clock. It's three in the morning and your body feels as if you haven't slept for days. Going all day without sleep wouldn't be too pleasant for any party that had to be around you. You release another choppy breath and decide to just go for it. You were too desperate for sleep to care anymore.

You quietly left the room and you know the colonel is surprised to see you when he looks from you to the clock. He doesn't say anything, perhaps assuming you are getting a drink, as you cross the room. You sit on the couch next to him nearly commenting on the glasses perched on his nose but you refrain. You want to be on his good side for this. With colored cheeks you lay on your side with your head on his lap.

"Shut up," you mumble before he can say anything. You clutch his pant leg and bury your nose into his knee still shaking. The colonel seems to understand because he grabs a blanket from the back of the couch and throws it over your body, covering your head as well. You are grateful for this because it is now dark enough to concentrate on sleep.

"I didn't say anything Ed," the colonel said as he brought his paperwork to him so he wasn't bending forward, "But if you ever want to talk you know where to find me." Your grip on his pant leg tightens. His hand lands on your head and through the blanket he ruffles your hair. Your blush darkens but you are able to close your eyes without seeing the gruesome images. The scratching of a pen on paper and the sound of turning pages along with the colonel's breathing lulls you to sleep.

**The reason the dream sequence is so out of order and strangely written is because Night Terrors don't really have…'plot.' They are really just a series of terrifying images that don't make sense. They don't really tell a story like dreams or nightmares do. They are just there to terrify. During a nightmare you will wake up before you see the gruesome act, like the stabbing or death or other, but a night terror isn't as kind…that's part of what makes them so scary, that and the fact that they seem far more real than anything.**


	7. Chapter 7: A Threat From the Furher

Chapter 7

Threat From the Furher

**AngelicAlchemist93: Thanks for the friendly review but where I want this story to be, Riza actually starts off as a Second Lieutenant and gets her promotion later. I really appreciate the concern though. If you notice anything else don't hesitate to let me know. I'm just one person I can't catch everything. ^.^**

You wake up still on the couch and still with your head in the colonel's lap. The blanket has disappeared somewhere and you assume that's the reason you are shivering. Blinking, you sit up and rub your face with the heels of your hands. The colonel has fallen asleep with his head completely tilted backward and a file still held loosely in his hand. You take the file from his hand and place it on the coffee table as you look for a clock. It feels like late morning but you aren't entirely sure. You are about to get up from the couch when the phone starts ringing.

"Er…Colonel…the phone…" You say to the sleeping man in front of you. You shift slightly and poke his cheek. He doesn't react. You poke him again and you think he might have twitched a finger. The phone is still ringing and you aren't sure if you should answer it or not. The ringing suddenly stops and you think that your question has answered itself. Two seconds later it starts ringing again.

"Colonel! The phone," you hiss while giving his shoulders a shake. His head lolls to the side, "Screw it." You march over to the phone and pick it up. Before you can even greet the person a voice is already blaring into your ear.

"ROY! You gotta get ready  _now_. The Furher is on his way to your house! I've kept him from Ed for as long as I can but he's going to have to make a solid decision. You know I think he should quit but your word will have more sway."

"The Furher is coming  _here_?" You nearly yell.

"Shit, Ed?"

"Colonel wake the fuck up!" You ditch the phone on the edge of the stand it's on, not bothering to hang it up. You jump onto the colonel and roughly shake his shoulders again. This time the man wakes up with a start.

"What the  _hell_  Ed?"

"The  _fucking_  Furher is on his way here! NOW!" You yell at the colonel.

"What?!" You are thrown to the ground as the colonel stands in a hurry, "Go get ready Ed!"

"Ready for  _what_?" You aren't entirely sure what you should be doing. You're the sick one who should be allowed to be in pajamas all day. The colonel throws you a look and you frown.

"At least make yourself look presentable." You roll your eyes but you march into your room where you grab some "proper" clothing for the day. The colonel is hurrying to look neat by the time you come back out and pick up the phone again, hoping that Hughes was still on the line.

"So what exactly should I be preparing for?"

"Ed I should talk to Roy."

"….I don't care. He's standing in front of the mirror anyway so you have me. What exactly does the colonel have more sway about with me?"

"Ed this is serious, let me talk to Roy." You are about to say no when the phone is snatched from your hands and the colonel places a hand on your head.

"Go do something about your hair," he tells you.

"My hair is fine." The colonel then roughly ruffles your hair making it a frayed white boy fro. You glare but slink off to the bathroom to tame the wild mess while the colonel speaks to Hughes. You can't really hear the conversation as you drag a brush through your hair but you are pretty sure it's about your choice. You could either leave the military or stay now that you got your limbs back. The Furher was on his way just to hear  _your_  answer? Something sounded strange there. It seemed like it was more of a threat than anything and it didn't seem like Hughes understood that. There was something all around strange about the Furher that made your skin crawl. He was dangerous and clearly trying to make a point that he wasn't just going to let you walk away. It seemed that you would know more when he showed up. You left the bathroom while braiding your hair.

"Thanks Hughes," Mustang said before he hung up the phone.

"How much time do we have?"

"Not much but I should talk to you Ed," Mustang starts. You aren't entirely sure that you want to hear his argument, "Just keep in mind that the decision is yours-," You cut him off before he can finish,

"Actually I don't think it is. Clearly the Furher is trying to intimidate me and possibly you, because he doesn't want me to quit. Depending on what he's going to say is going to make my decision final."

"…You're sure?" Mustang didn't seem to doubt the idea that the Furher was trying to intimidate you so you nodded and he sighed, "Alright I'll trust you on this one." You blinked as the colonel started to collect his files. He was trusting  _you_  with something like this?

"…Thanks…" You mumbled with your chin in the air and red cheeks. The colonel offered a smile just as the doorbell rang.

"Just pretend like you didn't know he was coming." You walked into your room and shut the door without saying anything to the colonel who shook his head slightly then went to answer the door. You hear the colonel exclaiming his surprise as you sit down at the desk in your room to make it look as if you are researching. You're pretty sure that you're going to have to say you'll stay so it would be better if you made it look like you were working on your alchemy. You doodled a few circles before the colonel knocked politely on your door.

"Yeah?" you called out.

"Come on out FullMetal your presence is requested." You rolled your eyes but the effect went unnoticed seeing as though no one could see your expression.

"Coming." You called as you shut the text book you had open next to you with a loud slam. You stepped out of the room and feigned surprise at the Furher and at Mustang's prompted glare you saluted, "A surprise to see you sir." You said trying to sound respectful which impressed the colonel.

"Ah unfortunately we are here for urgent business and you'll have to excuse my forwardness FullMetal," Furher Bradley said as he gestured to the trained looking men around him then waved his hand in a dismissal, you dropped the salute.

"I'm sure that someone like you would have made sure to notify the people he was coming to visit so early in the morning, unless of course it was  _urgent_  business," you said with a sly grin. The colonel nearly froze mid stride when he went to grab beverages. He threw you a look over his shoulder as he disappeared into the kitchen but you ignored it. You were going to press your luck, just to see how far you could get.

"Ah yes I would like to apologize for my sudden appearance," Bradley said as he crossed his legs on the couch, "How is your health FullMetal?" It seemed that you had taken Bradley himself by surprise seeing as though he was now not being as forward as he claimed that he wanted to be.

"Eh, it's so-so," You say while plopping on the couch in an undignified slouch and swinging your legs up on the cushions, "I've definitely been better and I've been worse. They've got me as their guinea pig sir, trying all sorts of different medications and injections even," you say while remembering the sly move the colonel pulled the previous morning, you would have to watch out for him.

"I see, well we certainly have your health as a top priority FullMetal." The colonel entered the room again with a tray of drinks. He noticed your position on the couch almost instantly.

"Feet off the furniture FullMetal," he ordered then placed the drinks on the table. You rolled your eyes but plopped your feet onto the floor.

"Well you said you wanted to be straightforward sir, what exactly did you come all the way here for?" You could see the colonel was itching to reprimand you.

"Ahh yes, I am in need of your answer FullMetal and it seems as though you haven't given a straight answer to anyone." You notice the men that are standing behind the couch shift their right hands towards the holsters on their hips. Your golden eyes only flicker to then for a moment before you're staring down the most powerful man in the country.

"My answer sir?"

"I need to know FullMetal, where your loyalties lie."

"My loyalties sir?"

"Are you leaving the military for your family or are you staying for your country?"

"You came all the way here for that?" Mustang threw you a glare and you added "sir."

"Yes."

"Well that was rather stupid don't you think?"

"FullMetal!" Mustang gasped in shock. The two men in the back looked to the Furher once more and you knew that they had orders to shoot you down if you chose to leave. It made sense really, you had knowledge of almost everything in central's library and you could recall almost all of it. If anyone wanted to get that information they would go to you.

"I say it's stupid because it's preposterous to think that I would leave the military don't you think so colonel?" Your grin widens as the men relax a little, "I mean what more does a 16 year old want other than power?" The Furher seems pleased by this and he nods.

"Yes, yes and it is all something that we can give you FullMetal." You didn't miss the 'we' but you decided to store it away for the future.

"And I thank you for that."

"Well if that is all that you have to say, I'd like to ask you something else FullMetal."

"Yes sir?"

"What have you been able to remember?"

"Not much sir." You didn't miss a beat despite the Furher trying to unsettle you.

"Anything is impressive." You nearly narrow your eyes, why would something like that be impressive? You notice the men stiffening again.

"Oh?"

"Care to fill me in FullMetal?"

"Only things such as waking up in the desert with the colonel and the rest of the team," you lie.

"You could not remember that?"

"I couldn't remember much sir, I was pretty out of it."

"Yes, yes you would be." You weren't sure if the Furher was simply messing up in his speech so much on purpose or if he was really so confident that you wouldn't notice anything that he wasn't paying attention.

"Are you having any luck with finding my brother?" You ask having to know more than what Mustang has told you.

"…We are trying but our resources are limited." You clench your jaw that just meant that they didn't really give two shits about finding your brother. It was doubtful that anyone was even looking.

"Then I guess you can count that as my next mission as soon as I'm moved back into active duty sir." Mustang's eyes couldn't get any bigger than they were now. You were probably going to get an earful after they left. The silence filled the tense atmosphere as you had a stare off with the most powerful man in the country. Mustang looked ridiculous in the background and you hoped he'd get that strange look from his eye. Such a look was starting to bug you, especially since you couldn't place what it was.

"Well I suppose I've intruded enough on your morning. I'll see you at work on Monday morning Mustang." It was not a question and Mustang automatically saluted.

"Yes, sir." You threw a lazy salute after the man and resisted the urge to call, "See ya later pops," after the old man. You did however wave quite cheerfully as the car pulled out of the driveway. As soon as it had turned off the street you were cupping the back of your head blinking away tears of pain.

"Well I know I took you by surprise but I don't think that was necessary." You gritted out while searching for anything that would suggest the colonel was in just as much pain from the hit as you were.

"What the  _hell_  were you thinking Edward? That was the  _Furher_  that you were talking so disrespectfully to. I  _trusted_  you to handle this and to use that damn brain of yours!" You bristled in anger.

"And you don't think I did?! I did handle it in the best way I could Mustang!"

" _That_  was  _not_  the best way to handle the situation!" The colonel's voice was loud in your ears.

"You didn't notice the shit heads behind him twitching for their guns?! You didn't notice how  _everything_  I did was just  _ignored_  by the  _Furher_?! Clearly there's more to me staying than anyone is letting on! He doesn't want me to leave for a reason!" You were yelling now.

"Putting yourself as a target for a court marshal was  _not_  the way to go!"

"Damn it you just doing fucking get it! He  _wasn't_  going to give me a court marshal! He just wants to keep tabs and me in the palm of his fucking hand! He knows something colonel and you're being too fucking blind to see it!" You didn't even see the slap coming but you sure as hell felt the fierce power behind it. It sent you stumbling back and then crashing to the ground while you cradled your cheek.

"You may get away with blatant disrespect with me but if you bring it up with someone that holds that much power you're forcing me to act on it. Now  _I'm_ being expected to discipline you for what you just did. Did you even think that your actions might reflect on my image?"

"Oh because that's all  _Mustang_  gives a damn about! Your damn reputation is all you fucking care about!" You don't think you've ever seen such a dark look on the colonel's face before and you're almost sure that you're going to be hit for a third time. Instead the colonel points to your room and orders you to leave.

"Get out of my sight." Your stomach crumples on itself and you can feel a memory just brushing against your mind but your current anger is taking precedence as you push it aside, "Go!" The colonel roars. You try to convince yourself that the tears in your eyes are just from the pain but you are failing miserably. You slam your door shut and punch the wall in anger not feeling the pain in your hand as you repeat the action three more times. Your anger is forced down as the memory invades and you crumple to the ground from the pain in your head.

_"Screw you old man!" you scream at your biological father as he draws on the cement flooring with chalk, "She's not doing it! Having one damn medium isn't enough! She can't do it on her own and fuck you for suggesting it!"_

_"Edward-," Hohenheim started but you cut him off,_

_"No! Fuck this!" You draw the blanket around your shoulders in tighter trying to keep the shivers away, "I'm not going to risk getting our bodies back if it means that she dies because she can't provide the energy needed!"_

_"Ed…" You whirl around to face Chiyo._

_"Don't let him force you!"_

_"Ed…I'm the one that asked him to help me create a circle ideal for one medium."_

_"…What?" You're absolutely shocked. Didn't she know the risks? Didn't she know that she could die?_

_"It's delicate you know, to do a transmutation with more than one medium."_

_"But it's reckless to do it with just one!"_

_"That's funny coming from the king of reckless brother." Your gaze shifts to Al, the metal gleams in the moonlight and you want nothing more than to get him back to normal._

_"Al-," This time you're cut off by Chiyo._

_"Look Aniki, it's delicate because you have to find three other people who have the same energy levels as I do. I've been sleeping a lot so my energy is just about at max. Do you even know how hard it is to keep sitting still right now? My energy levels have always been far higher than anyone. It's safer if only I'm used as a medium."_

_"But,"_

_"You just have to trust me okay." You clench your fists trying your hardest to not explode on her, "Okay?"_

_"….Okay." you finally agree. The next thing you know Al is sitting quite calmly in the middle of the circle._

_"Just sit there and don't move in no matter what Edward." You clench your jaw trying not to say anything to that bastard of a man, "Do you understand me?" You nearly roll your eyes as he tries to take on a parental tone. You gasp in shock when he grips your upper arm and lifts you onto the cold metal ledge by the wall._

_"What the hell?!"_

_"Do you. Understand me?" He repeats in clipped tones._

_"Yes I fucking understand you!" Hohenheim sighs and turns to talk to Al and Chiyo._

_"After this transmutation is over we'll have to be quick. I'll be needed in both but only for just the beginning. After I'm finished with the first part of Edward's I'll take Al somewhere warmer. He won't survive long in this weather."_

_"Then why are we doing this in fucking Drachma?" You shivered._

_"Because I said so." You clenched your fist and he continued, "We need to get this done as fast as we can_ before _the homunculi get here."_

_"Especially that damn Bradley he pisses me off," Chiyo comments nearly bouncing in her circle, the one marked with the phoenix._

_"Alright are you ready Al? Chiyo?"_

_"Ready!" They both replied cheerfully. Hohenheim stepped onto the circle marked with the gates eye and the butterflies took flight in your stomach._

_"Alright on the count of three Chiyo."_

_"Okay."_

_"One." They both changed their stance._

_"Two," Chiyo counted. They both clapped their hands together._

_"Three," they said in unison and placed their hands on the circle at the same time._

"Be mad all you want Edward but it's time for lunch!" Damn the colonel still sounded pissed and it was already time for lunch? You guess he really was serious about not missing meals. The problem was you felt horribly weak and tired. Your head was pounding like it did just before the memory overtook you. So lesson learned, don't force memories down it hurts like hell. You manage to move your arms up to each side of your head and you feebly rub your temple.

"Open the damn door." You sigh and attempt to sit up when you realize it isn't locked and the colonel was bound to try and open it thinking it was locked. You looked at your placement on the floor. You were, unfortunately, right next to the door which was in fact opened with an unnecessary amount of force right into your stomach.

"Ugh…damn colonel…" you groan.

"Why are you on the floor?" The anger seemed to be momentarily forgotten and replaced with confusion.

"I passed out," you groan while holding your stomach.

"You…passed out?"

"I regained another memory…would you help me up?" Your tone was now annoyed. The colonel pulls you up, a little too quickly, by your elbow and you take a moment to lean against the wall and to focus on not throwing up.

"Tell me about it," Mustang demands as he sits you down at the table and places food in front of you. Your stomach is in no shape to handle food but you take a bite of the stuff anyway. It's not too bad and you decide that maybe the colonel isn't as bad of a cook as you first thought.

"I remembered the first part of the transmutation circle." You then described what you saw and heard while finishing off the dinner roll on your plate. The colonel nodded briefly and his brow furled when Chiyo mentioned Bradley suggesting that he was a homunculi but he said nothing. He merely waited until you finished before he snuck another needle in your arm while you weren't paying attention.

"What the hell?! Fuck Mustang!"

"It could be another Bradley but we'll have to be cautious."

"You fucking stabbed me  _again_?!"

"I suppose at this point it would be safe to assume that Hohenheim has Alphonse."

"What the  _hell_  is wrong with you?!" You yelled as you snagged the bandage out of his shirt pocket and you cursed yourself for not noticing it sooner.

"Calm down Ed." You grumbled but didn't say anything else.

"It would explain all the slip-ups during our little 'chat.'" You mumbled while crumpling the bandage wrappings, and then sticking that back in Mustangs pocket.

"Slip-ups?"

"You really didn't notice?"

"I was too concerned with my idiot subordinate talking so disrespectfully to the Furher."

"I was testing him! If I went too far I would have realized it and apologized. At that point I would have acted more respectfully."

"Testing him?"

"Clearly he was trying to threaten me by just showing up unannounced."

"Or even just showing up at all."

"Right," you said glad that the colonel was finally listening to you, "His meat-heads standing beside the couch were just twitching for their guns. So if I left he would either want me dead or heavily injured so that he could do whatever he wanted. At first I thought it was because I've read almost every book in Centrals library and I can recall almost all of the information but if he really had a problem with something like that then Sheska would be dead."

"Sheska?"

"The girl that works for Hughes."

"Ah."

"She has a photographic memory and can tell you word for word anything in those books. So seeing as though she's fine he must have another reason for wanting me under his control right?"

"Other than the fact that you're 16 years old and one of the most powerful alchemists in Amsteris?"

"Yeah, other than that," you said while licking a bit of chicken broth off of your thumb, "That brings up the memory. It's no secret that the homunculi want Al and I for something, and the fact that Chiyo seemed to think that Bradley was a homunculi and no one disagreed with her probably means that he's a homunculi."

"Damn I'll have to warn the team."

"Do it discreetly though…they  _can't_  change the way they act around him or they'll get caught and killed. It's just how the homunculi work."

"I know Ed, I didn't get to where I am now by being obvious." You glared at him but continued anyway,

"Anyway he had several slip-ups during the conversation and I'm not sure if he meant to say them or not…"

"Like?"

"First of all he said that my health was "a top priority," and while I'm sure he says that to everyone it sounded different."

"Different how?"

"Like he was serious. If I'm healthy I'm a bigger risk to him, I can actually fight but if I'm like I am now I'd be screwed. My reaction time is off and I can't keep my stamina. I'm passing out every time I remember something and I can't keep the energy for transmutations. He'd kill me in minutes."

"So he's trying to keep you sick?"

"Not trying to keep me sick, he wants to finish his business before I get better."

"Question is what is his business?"

"Right."

"He has a lot of power Ed, be careful."

"I know, and that's the other thing. When he asked why I would stay I made up some bullshit about wanting power."

"I was hoping you just made that up." The colonel actually sounded relieved and you offered a grin at him.

"Anyway he said it was something that  _we_  could give you."

"We?"

"I don't know, maybe the other homunculi. I doubt he was talking about the military or he would have offered some cheap ass promotion right there. Which would mean they don't just want to use me they want me to join them. Like hell that would ever happen." You took a bite of the meat on the plate hoping it stayed down.

"You keep me posted I want to know if he says anything to you on Monday."

"Monday?"

"He just made it clear that he wants me back in the office on Monday, that means that you'll have to be there too."

"Are you sure that's smart?"

"What do you mean?"

"Well there are several health risks."

"Damn I forgot about that, we had to get this whole house cleaned just for the doc to consider leaving you here."

"Well I guess there's that too, but I mean all of Bradley's men. They'll be storming the place…"

"Of course you would think about that…" You shrugged.

"Anyway he asked what I remembered and said that anything would be 'impressive.'" You frowned, "he knows how I lost my memories and why."

"He's trying to keep them away from you."

"Something happened at that transmutation and I'm going to find out." The colonel frowned at you and gripped your chin turning your head to look at him.

"You'll do it carefully and you'll let me know what you're thinking and only after you have my approval will you act. Do you understand?"

"Damn you're just like the bastard," you say remembering Hohenheim using the exact same line.

"Do you. Understand me?" Now it was a moment of Déjà vu but you actually nodded this time.

"Yeah I understand." There was no bite in your voice and Mustang searched your eyes before he let go of your chin and let you go back to your meal.

"Good, what else did he say?"

"That I  _'would be_ ' pretty out of it, again suggesting that he knows exactly what happened." Mustang nodded and placed a pill in the palm of your hand. You grimaced but were able to get it down with just one glass of water.

"Good job." You glared at the praise but continued, "He also said that he wasn't searching for Al."

"He came right out and said that?" The colonel looked doubtful.

"He didn't have to; I know what "limited resources" means." The colonel nodded in agreement.

"So I guess that's one good thing we can take away. He just wants me he doesn't want Al."

"Or he already has him." You feel your stomach drop and suddenly you can't eat anymore. You were trying to keep those thoughts out of your mind.

"No…he doesn't. Chiyo  _said_  that he was safe and you even said that Hohenheim probably had him. I know she's telling the truth."

"Even though you heard her screaming to let him go…"

"…I think everything's okay…"

"If you're sure."

**Sorry that this is so late you guys. I've had no motivation to write even though I have NOTHING to do now. Finals week is over and I don't have any classes until the 22** **nd** **of January. I have a nice long break so hopefully I'll pick up some motivation as a Christmas present to me and get writing! My internet has also been out for a few days because of the blizzard here so I apologize that this is even later than late. T.T**

**Thanks for reading,**

**Koibito~**


	8. A Major Setback

**Chapter 8**

**A major Set back**

**IMPORTANT: This chapter will seem very strange at first glance but there is method in my madness.**

**Also, what's up with the cold shoulder guys?  I'm not feeling the love. T.T Authors are fragile beings with little to no self-esteem. We rely on reviews to get us through the next four hours of our life.**

**I also feel pretty bad because I've been trying to crank out chapters as fast as I can and because of that you guys aren't getting very good quality so I'm going to take more time to go back over and edit these chapters. Please be patient with me.**

You are currently lying on the living room floor again, the sun feels wonderful on your skin and if it wasn't so cold outside you would go lay in the yard. The colonel is off in the kitchen cleaning up the dinner that you barely touched. Today was one of the worse off days and you weren't doing such a great job stomaching anything. In all fairness you did try after several demands from the colonel to eat…you just didn't put a whole lot of effort into keeping it down. Throwing up didn't really seem to help your stomach any and it certainly didn't help the soreness in your throat. It seemed that the stress you went through during the earlier parts of the day was wearing on you. The colonel was now being more annoying as he pestered you to stand and go sit on the couch so he could clean out your wounds. Apparently he was done in the kitchen.

"Edward, get up." You ignored him again in favor of the sun's rays. Perhaps if you kept at it he would think you fell asleep and he would leave you be, "I'm not stupid Edward, up." You scrunched your nose up upset that you couldn't fool him and your course of action was taken from you.

"Fine, damn I get it," you grumble as the colonel once again nags at you to sit. Up. You haul yourself up and take a step only to have your vision bombarded by stray black dots and your head began to feel light.

"Shit, Ed look at me." The colonel was asking you to look at him? Well he'd have to fucking wait until the annoying black dots went away. You told him that too.

"Hang on…the black dots are clouding my vision still…" They were taking a while to disappear, "Stop poking my damn cheek…'s annoying."

"Ed, your eyes are closed…you just have to open them." Funny, you don't remember closing your eyes. You crack them open weary of the harsh light that was waiting for them. You blink rapidly trying to get used to the brightness when you realize you're back on the floor. Well half of you is, the other half is resting on Mustang's lap.

"…The fuck happened?"

"You were out for about five seconds," the colonel answered. Damn you must have passed out, "Follow my finger." The colonel placed one finger in front of you but you rolled your eyes.

"No way, I'm fine just let me up," you insist. The colonel refuses and keeps you down.

"Follow," he commands. You sigh but relent. He moves his finger to the right and you follow it, "No...don't move your head just your eyes."

"I am!"

"No you aren't, try again." He not so discreetly pins your head against his ribcage and arm so you can't move it. He moves his finger to the left and you follow again then follow it as it goes to the right and up and down. You feel the dizzy sensation returning and for some reason you lose sight of the finger for half a second.

"Shit…Shit wait…you're making me dizzy….stop…" You try to snag his hand out of the air but you miss.

"Alright, we're going to see a doctor."

"NO! No! I'm fine."

"Clearly you aren't Edward or you wouldn't be on the ground looking like you're about to be sick."

"No Mustang  _please_ , it's just because I didn't eat and I stood up way too fast!"

"Edward…"

" _Please_  don't take me," you were begging him. You couldn't go….you couldn't. "I  _can't_  please." Mustang seemed to be considering his options.

"You need to  _eat_  Ed. You can't just keep missing out on meals and trying to ditch your medication."

"Like today was my fault! I wasn't able to eat lunch or breakfast because of the damn Fuhrer!"

"Edward," this was your last warning.

"Okay…Okay I'll try just please don't make me go." He sighed and ran a hand through his hair.

"If you can keep dinner down I won't take you okay, but you've got to start eating more." You nod in agreement.

"Okay, I'll stomach it…" Surprisingly you are able to keep down dinner but your stomach silently rebels against you. You are just barely able to keep the look of pain off of your face; there is no way you are giving Mustang any excuse to take you to that damn hospital. You even let the colonel sanitize and rewrap your wounds without a fuss. However, your stomach doesn't settle at all and you try to act as normally as you can before you have to feign sleepiness on the couch. You were dying to just leave to bed on your own but that would raise suspicion in the Colonel. You watched him look through a few papers then you would blink lethargically when you noticed him watching you. You realized he needed a bigger hint and you let your head droop a few times before laying it on the arm of the couch on top of your folded arms. You yawned once and continued with the slow blinking.

"Go to bed Ed," the colonel said without looking up from his work. As much as you wanted to agree with him and leave you knew it would look strange so you frowned and sat up instead.

"I'm not tired." You rubbed your nose scratching a non-existent itch. The colonel looks up from his paperwork and narrows his eyes. You are frightened for half a second thinking that he figured out your plan.

"Bullshit, go or I'll force you." Apparently the colonel wasn't in the mood tonight. The paperwork must be a bitch. You glare at him for a moment actually trying to judge if he was serious or not. He puts his pen and paper down and stands far faster than you anticipated.

"Wait! Wait I'm going!" You rise quickly but Mustang isn't taking any of your shit. He places a hand in between your shoulder blades and makes sure you go into your room. You wiggle your shoulder blades uncomfortably but he merely presses firmer and steers you toward the five chest dresser.

"Get your pajamas and go. To. Sleep."

"Get off, I get it!" You wiggle away from his hand but make sure he see's you opening the top drawer. He leaves the room and allows you to change in peace when your stomach revolts against you and the sharp pain becomes worse and you are feeling horribly nauseous. You button the shirt and nearly power walk for your door when you force yourself to slow down. You walk through the door and turn left trying to look calm.

"Bed, Edward. Turn around and get in bed."

"Gotta pee," you mumble before going into the bathroom and closing the door and locking it behind you. You keep as quiet as possible while you puke your guts into the toilet. You keep the gagging and dry heaving to a minimum while you flush the toilet and run the water from the sink. You rinse your mouth out and try to look as if you hadn't been throwing up before you shut off the tap and dry your face off. Thankfully it seemed that the colonel didn't notice anything and you are able to return to your room without a confrontation.

You lay down for the night but are unable to get a decent amount of sleep. You are constantly waking up and are unable to fall completely asleep during the night. Your forehead feels warm even to your hands and you broke out into a cold sweat somewhere around one am. You are curled around one sheet while the rest of the blankets are pooled around the bed on the floor. Your braid came undone twenty minutes ago and the loose hairs seem to stick to your slick skin. Your stomach still feels awful and at five you figure you should get up and make it look like you're healthier. You stumble into the shower hoping it didn't wake the colonel. Your body feels exhausted and you are forced to sit down half way into your shower from pure dizziness. You look at the palm of your hand and notice shampoo is pooled there…didn't you already use it? Oh well, you shampoo your hair again then use the conditioner. You can't remember if you washed your body yet or not so you do it anyway. You shut the water off and realize you forgot to rinse the suds off. After turning the water back on and doing just that, you dry off and change back into the pajamas you were already wearing. You forgot to bring in clean ones.

"Edward? What are you doing up?" You scramble for an excuse as you shut the bathroom door behind you. The colonel crosses his arms looking somewhat suspicious. You then realize that it's Monday.

"It's Monday Colonel…aren't I going with you to the office?" He frowns and places the back of his hand against your forehead.

"You have a fever…"

"It's just from the hot water," you say gesturing to the bathroom. His frown deepens but he doesn't say anything more on it.

"You aren't going to the office; Havoc is coming to watch you since the Fuhrer seemed adamant on me being there today."

"I don't think I need a babysitter," you pout.

"Which is exactly why you do," the colonel said, "Go back to bed you look tired." You are far too tired to argue. You lie down and actually manage an hour of sleep before you hear the Lieutenant walk in.

"Hey Chief how 'ya feelin'?" Your response is into your pillow thus making it impossible for Havoc to understand what you said, "Wanna try that again Chief?" You roll your head to the side and repeat,

"Tired."

"Well according to the Colonel you went to bed early last night and I really shouldn't let you sleep through breakfast so get up and eat something, then you can go back to sleep."

"No," you groan feeling no energy rising up at all.

"You've also got some medication to take so you'll need to do that too." You merely groan this time trying to go back to sleep. The lieutenant is obviously under orders to make sure you get your three meals and medication because he grabs you by the arm and pulls you into a sitting position. Immediately the dizziness sets in and you allow the Lieutenant to pull you into the kitchen so you don't have to explain why you're staggering. You lay your head on the counter as soon as you're sat on the barstool.

"I'm tired," you defend before Havoc can say anything. He puts his hands up in defense then leans on the counter.

"What do you want to eat?"

"Bed," you mumble.

"I'm a grilled cheese kind of man myself." You look at him as if to say,  _seriously_  its breakfast. He grins sheepishly, "Well I guess my little siblings like them so I end up eating them a lot." He didn't seem to catch the full meaning of your look.

"You have siblings?"

"Brother and a sister," Havoc answers while reaching for a pan. You blink confused.

"I thought you were an only child…"

"Nope."

"You said you were…" Havoc frowned and tried to recall a moment where he might have said  _something_  to that degree.

"No…I've never said so…" You suddenly realize that this was Havoc in front of you. You blush momentarily embarrassed that you were thinking that he was Breda for some strange reason.

"Right…right sorry."

"Wow you really  _must_  be tired, apologizing and all." You scrunch your nose up and close your eyes trying to fall asleep to avoid having to eat something. Your stomach was acting up again. You hear something sizzling on the stove, probably the buttered bread, and you try to tune it out. There is a sudden  _clunk_  next to your ear and the sound of something rattling. One guess as to what  _that_ was.

"I don't want to take it."

"I'm under orders to take you to the hospital if you refuse medication and food Chief." Your eyebrow twitches in irritation.

"Fine." You manage to stomach the necessary glass and a half of water and medication without throwing up in front of Havoc but when you notice the gloopy mass of grilled cheese that is set on the counter, you are very unsure if you could make it to the bathroom by the time you finished eating it.

"Do you prefer Ketchup or should I heat up some tomato soup?" Oh god no, you couldn't handle having to eat soup as well as a sandwich.

"Ketchup is fine," you mumble while eyeing the gooey mess. Ketchup is added to the plate and you are feeling pretty nervous about escaping this round unnoticed. You aren't sure how you did it but you managed the  _whole_  damn thing without being caught. You went to take the plate to the sink but as soon as you grabbed it and slid it from the counter it slipped through your shaking fingers and shattered on the ground, "Shit!" you yelped.

"Get back Chief," Havoc put his arm out to prevent you from trying to pick up the pieces.

"Shit, Shit I'm sorry, I don't know what happened…"

"It's fine Chief I'm sure the colonel won't mind  _one_  plate. Just make sure you have a better grip on it next time." That was the problem; you thought as you nodded dumbly at Havoc, you did have a full grip on it. It just felt like your fingers couldn't bear the weight of the plate and you were forced to let go.

"Sorry…" you weren't sure what else you should say, "I can fix it." You clapped your hands together only to have them ripped apart and held on opposite sides of your body.

"No. You aren't allowed to use alchemy Chief. It's too much of a strain on you right now. Like I said, it's one plate. Go sit in the living room while I get this cleaned up. You nod and head straight for the bathroom. While the plate dropping wasn't planned it sure was a useful distraction. Your stomach was going against you again. You keep just as quiet as you did the previous night and up went breakfast. You  _never_  wanted to see another grilled cheese in your life. You took a moment to breathe then flushed and washed up. You skipped the living room and made your way into your own bedroom. You had the damn food and you took the medication, Havoc could not prevent you from curling up under the covers and trying to sleep. You placed a hand over your heart, which was beating very fast, and you took a calming breath wondering what was making it beat like it was as you curled up and threw the covers over your head.

"Chief?" You weren't sure when your eyes closed but you knew they were opening now as you were interrupted in the middle of sleeping again.

"What?" you bit out feeling irritated.

"I was just making sure you were here, you have the tendency to just up and disappear. Do you want anything? Water or juice?"

"No."

"I'll get you a glass of water." You nearly smacked yourself on the forehead, no meant NO. You tried to ignore the fact that you were dizzy even while lying down and you focused on falling back asleep.

_"Shhh You'll wake brother…"_

_"Yeah wouldn't want him waking up in that position." In what position? What was Chiyo talking about? All you knew that was for as crappy as you felt you were pretty comfortable._

_"I don't think Dad would make it out alive…" Alphonse sounded worried. You cracked an eye open and noticed a golden beard above you. Holy mother of god, you were laying in the bastards lap. You struggled to sit up but he held you down by your shoulders._

_"Now, now you were sleeping just fine a minute ago. Go back to sleep."_

_"Let me go damn it!" You struggled against the old man but you fell into a coughing fit before you could get up._

_"Are you getting enough air Aniki?" Chiyo sounded so worried that you smiled toward her and nodded, "liar." She pouted when you started wheezing._

_"Dad, we can't do the transmutation until brother is better because he might not make it right?"_

_"Yes…"_

_"So let Chiyo do her transmutation so brother can get more air…we're at a pretty high altitude so it's hard to get a good amount of air and by the time that he gets better she'll have the energy back…" Al offered._

_"I don't see what the harm is…go for it Reichiyo." She wrinkled her nose and your eyes shifted suspiciously between the three of them._

_"You don't have to use my full name…I don't like it much anyway." She clapped her hands anyway and held them out in front of her. The space around you shimmered and you noticed that you were incased in something that resembled ice. You knocked a finger against it and realized that it was as hard as crystal. That was right, Chiyo specialized in two different types of alchemy, the first being Crystal Ice alchemy which she created by mixing mainly oxygen, carbon dioxide and water particles in the air. As it dissipated back into the air it released a form of pure oxygen which you had to admit, was helping your breathing a lot. The second Alchemy you were having a hard time remembering as your eye lids fell back down and you, unfortunately, fell asleep in the old man's lap._

"Chief? Hey wake up buddy."

"Gimme another hour Chiyo…" You mumble still caught up in the memory.

"Chiyo? Chief I'm hurt," the voice sounded like it was faking the hurt to you, "Come on its lunchtime up and at 'em chief."

"Nugh," you groaned feeling like shit. You were pulled into a sitting position and you placed a hand on the side of your head feeling light headed and dizzy. You jumped at the hand on your forehead.

"You've got a fever again Chief, you did take the medication didn't you?"

"What medication?" You were confused. Havoc didn't offer you medication; he just pulled you out of bed.

"Seriously? Did you drop the pill somewhere when I wasn't looking?

"What pill?" you asked irritated, "You never gave me one!"

"Yes I did, at breakfast."

"Breakfast?"

"Maybe we should go to the hospital…"

"No! No I remember now! I thought you were talking about just now…" You defend hoping that Havoc would leave you alone. He still looked unsure, "I really did take it! I remember because it took a glass and a half of water!"

"Alright….well it's time for lunch Chief…."

"Okay, Okay." You were trying your hardest to  _not_  get sent to the hospital but as you stumbled out of bed and had to rely on Havoc's support you knew you weren't building a very good case for yourself. Everything seemed to go downhill from there. At breakfast you were able to subtlety puke in the bathroom but at lunch your stomach seemed to have enough and you ran, not so subtlety, for the restroom where Havoc found you puking. He pulled your hair away from your mouth and smoothed it away from your warm face then braided it for you and tied it off efficiently. He must have a little sister with long hair, you thought.

"Come on now Chief, my cooking isn't that bad."

"I'm okay….I'm okay…" You mumbled while trying to find the handle to flush. Havoc moved your hand back to your side and flushed for you, he then wiped your face with a wet washcloth.

"No you aren't Chief," Havoc sighed as he scooped you up with surprising strength. He placed you on the couch and you could feel your heart beating quickly with your quick inhaled breathing, "Hey, whoa Chief, calm down." You jumped when you heard a sudden screaming that Havoc didn't seem to react to.

"What was  _that_?!"

"What was what?"

"Someone screamed!" Havoc 's brow furled and your eyes darted around the room.

"Who-who's there?!" There was some figure standing in the corner of the room hidden by shadows. Your heart pounded faster, "W-What are you doing?" They pulled a knife and you heard the scream again.

"Edward….no one is there…." Your eyes darted between Havoc and the shadowed man that was approaching with the knife. Havoc couldn't see him! He was going to get hurt. You threw your body into Havoc's taking the man by surprise and knocking him to the ground. You clapped your hands and pressed them to the ground. The hardwood flooring twisted and morphed to your whim and you tried to contain the man but he just continued advancing. Panicked you clapped again only to have your hands ripped apart and held in the air by Havoc.

"What the hell are you doing?" You could feel the alchemic drain on your already exhausted body.

_"Die…Die you scum. You don't deserve it. Life. Die. Die. Die. Die. Die. Die DIEDIEIDIEIDEIDIEDIE!"_  The voice was whispery in your ear and you screamed trying to drown it out.

"Shut up! STOP! Shut up!"

"Chief, what the hell, calm down!" You managed to rip your hands away from Havoc and you pressed them against your ears.

"SHUT UP! SHUT UP!"

_"Die. Die. You don't deserve it. You couldn't even save a little girl. HA! You're a failure! A disgrace! I bet your brother left! He just doesn't want to see your face!"_

"SHUT UP! IT'S NOT TRUE!" You felt like you were crying but no tears would come. You were making all of the noises needed for a good cry but the tears weren't there. You could feel hands on your body and you tried to get away from them. One landed on your chest and pain exploded in the area taking you by surprise. You screamed. It hurt so badly you weren't sure what was going on but you  _had_  to get it off. You pushed at it trying to get it to release you.

"It hurts! It HURTS! STOP!"

_"Die failure. Die."_

"NO! STOP! I-I can't!" Your voice broke.

"Chief…Chief!" Suddenly you could hear Havoc's voice.

"Lieutenant! LIEUTENANT!" You  _screamed_.

"I'm right here Edward."

"It hurts…" You were grasping something, it seemed like his arm. Your breathing was wheezy and your chest still hurt.

"Just calm down, I'm getting help okay." You took a few more wheezy breaths before everything went dark and you could forget for a few moments. When you came to, you were on your side and everything seemed overly bright. You whimpered and tried to move away but there was a hand stopping you.

"No…No…" You sobbed.

"Chief, it's okay now. You're okay…"

"Lieutenant? What…what happened?" You shifted your shoulders and winced, "My chest…it's so tight…it hurts…what….what happened?"

"Looks like shock to me chief, although I can't say what caused it."

"Mustang? Where's Mustang?" You were still breathing funny and your heart was pounding quickly in your chest.

"Calm down Ed…I called him he's going to meet us."

"Meet? Meet where?"

"The hospital."

"No! No I don't want to! I'm okay!"

"Chief…you aren't okay. The ambulance is on the way okay."

"No….No."

"Shhh, what are you feeling right now?"

"I don't…please don't make me…" You were dreading going.

"Chief, please tell me what you're feeling."

"…I'm tired…I'm really tired…and dizzy."

"Okay…good." Havoc's voice was soothing and soft it was calming, "What else?"

"My mouth is dry. I feel weak…really weak."

"What else?"

"I-I don't know…what happened. What happened? I don't get it."

"Shh, don't get yourself worked up. Are you warm enough?" Warm? Yeah you were pretty warm. You nodded then realized it made your dizziness worse so you answered verbally.

"Yeah…I'm warm."

"Good. Can you tell me what you saw? Who was here? You said someone was here?" You remember the man and you take a breath and try to get up.

"Oh god. Oh god are you okay? He didn't stab you did he?" Havoc keeps you down.

"No, no. I'm okay. Where was he? It seems that he's left." Something sounds strange in Havoc's voice but you ignore it for the moment.

"He…he was by the door in the shadows, he had a knife. He..he had a knife…"

"Is that why you used Alchemy?" You nod.

"He was going to hurt you…"

"Were you telling him to shut up? What did he say?"

"No…No…"

"No what Ed?"

"Wasn't him…he didn't say anything…."

"Who did?"

"I don't know…"

"What did they say?"

"…Die…Die….Die…" You could hear Havoc shifting uncomfortably, "DIE DIE DIE!" You couldn't stop repeating the word. The whispery voices seemed to be hovering by your ear.

"Shhh, calm down. You're okay now….shhhh." Your hair was being petted and it was relaxing.

"Mustang? Where's Mustang?"

"He's going to meet us Ed." Right, Right you were going to the hospital after all…You could hear a loud wailing from outside the house.

"W-What's that? What is it?"

"The ambulance Ed. It's okay." You spaced out only for a moment and when you began to register your surroundings again there were so many people around you.

"No…No don't touch…don't touch me." You tried to jerk your arm away but it was held firmly by a pair of hands covered with latex gloves. The fingers pinched your skin together and you watched as it stayed wrinkled for a few moments then slowly started to stretch back out. A hand landed on your chest and you cried out and fought to get away. It hurt like hell and you were trying so hard to not cry but the pain was like hundreds of needles piercing your skin at once. The prickling feeling was overriding everything and you let out a choked sob but still couldn't feel tears.

"Hang on Chief, let them do their job." Havoc's voice brought you back to what was happening again. You fought your own body as it convulsed in pain leaving you gasping for breath.

"Do-Don't touch me," you gasp, "It hurts…It hurts."

"Get me a mask." Soon after there is a soft plastic mask being placed over your mouth and nose. You feel the soft whoosh of air and suddenly it doesn't hurt as much to breathe, "His pulse is too fast." The medic comments quietly to his partner. Your skin was wet and it was mildly irritating to you. You tried to wipe off the moistness on your skin and your hands were gently placed down at your sides by rubber gloves.

"Try to keep still okay." You try to nod but for the first time you notice someone is holding your head still, "Don't move your head major we still aren't sure if you have a spinal injury or not." You notice fingers moving quickly along your spine.

"How long has it been since you ate something?"

"He had breakfast a few hours ago," Havoc said when you were quiet.

"Two days ago…I was able to keep down dinner," you answer, "Everything else I've puked back up." You could tell Havoc was itching to tell you off but he refrained so the medics could ask you their questions.

"Have you been able to keep down liquids?"

"No."

"Well he's got to be dehydrated," the medic beside you said in a low voice.

"No spinal injuries," another said.

"You said he was having visual and auditory hallucinations?" You noticed them asking Havoc and he nodded. You frowned; it felt so real you were sure that there was someone in the room but Havoc didn't notice anything.

"On top of all that he preformed alchemy too."

"Alright let's move him."

"I don't want to…" you mumbled.

"Just bare with us for a little bit kid okay. We're going to move you and you'll become dizzy but we'll take care of you."

"I'm already dizzy," you said. He frowned and placed one hand on your shoulder and the other on your hip. You were rolled onto something soft and the movements made your head spin and you reached out for something to grab to stabilize yourself. You ended up with a handful of the Lieutenants fingers and you tried to hold them tightly but your grip was ridiculously weak. The ride to the hospital was a blur, the only part that really stuck out was the time when they had to get an IV in you and you tried to fight back but you couldn't gather the energy needed. This meant you ended up with an arm full of needle.

"Alright Major, if you start to feel tired just go ahead and sleep," The same medic that asked you questions was talking to you while adjusting something on the IV. You had felt tired all day but you were still unable to sleep so of course you tried. To your surprise when you opened your eyes again you were in a hospital room with a vase of flowers next to your bed. The door must have been slightly cracked because you could hear voices talking about your condition.

"We've stabilized his heart rate and we've got him on an IV drip to get some fluids back in his system. He's pretty dehydrated and will need some monitoring over the next few hours when he eats. When he can comfortably keep a meal down we'll release him back to you Colonel." The unfamiliar voice that was speaking must have been the doctor but the voice that followed after was clearly the colonel.

"What caused all of this?"

"Major Elric is very malnourished and because of this his body is missing several important vitamins that he isn't getting back through food or water. From what I was told he is almost constantly throwing up all of his meals this also throws away any water or liquids that his body would use for sustenance. This is one of the many reasons for the dehydration but anything like a fever, excessive sweating, and the vomiting together would cause a pretty severe dehydration. This seemed to lead to the Hypovolemic Shock he was in."

"What does hypovolemic mean?" Havoc's voice rang out and you tried to lay as still as possible so you could hear too.

"Due to the dehydration his blood pressure was dangerously low, this would cause the shock that the major went into."

"You said he was missing several vitamins," the colonel started to speak again, "Would missing some of those really be serious enough to put him here?"

"Yes, of course," the doctor paused for a moment, "He was missing the B1 vitamin known as Thiamine. This helps the body cells convert carbohydrates into energy which would explain his fatigue and weakness. Since he was missing it for such a long period of time, starting from when he became so malnourished, his body turned against him and this caused the Psycosis."

"Which would be the hallucinations?" Mustang asked.

"Yes, the lack of Thiamine would cause the auditory and visual hallucinations. What happens in them is completely up to the person's fears and worries."

"They were telling him to die." Havoc said softly. Great. Make it out like you thought you had to die or something. Fucking fantastic Havoc, great work there. You thought sarcastically.

"Perhaps we will have a talk with him when he's awake." The doctors deep baritone voice flowed smoothly into the room, "He was also missing the B6 vitamin known as Pyridoxal. It's a water soluble vitamin so the body can't store it. He's got to eat it every day through foods like Avacados, bananas or even nuts. There is a list that I will send with you colonel, I'd like to keep him off as many pills as I can and the side effects to not having this vitamin are not as problematic as others. However the Pyridoxal vitamin helps to build antibodies to fight infection so we need to keep him here for a while to make sure his fever doesn't worsen. If it does he is in for a rough few days."

"Edward is a picky eater," you snort at the colonel's words. You were  _not_  a picky eater there were just a lot of foods you didn't like, "Would it be possible to still get the pills so if he doesn't eat anything on the list he can still get the vitamins?"

"Of course." You were starting to not like this doctor, "It seems Major Elric has woken up. Shall we go in?" Oh of  _course_  he heard your snort. That just figures.

**I'm giving major thanks to Pubmed Health for all the information on the vitamins and types of shock and what a severe malnutrition from these vitamins can do to you.**


	9. Brigadier General Hughes

**Chapter 9**

**Brigadier General Hughes**

"Good afternoon Major Elric," your eyebrow twitches as the doctor that comes strolling in prefers to look at his clipboard instead of your face, "could you tell me who this man is?" He gestured to the colonel and you narrow your eyes.

"I didn't lose all of my memories you quack." You cross your arms and stare defiantly at Mustang who is giving you one of  _those_  looks.

"I didn't imply that you had major I would just like you to tell me who this man is." He had yet to look up from his clipboard, "Name and title if you would."

"…Colonel Mustang." You answer feeling like you're being set up as the butt of someone's sick joke.

"And this man?"

"Second Lieutenant Havoc?" You aren't sure what the point in this is.

"And this woman?"

"Second Lieutenant Hawkeye?"

"First Lieutenant," She corrected, "I have just received a promotion." Your eyes automatically fly to Mustangs. You know this is the work of Bradley who was giving Mustang a "reward" for keeping the  _Alchemist of the Century_  on a leash. Mustang gave you nothing but a look of slight concern mixed with a silent demand to  _not say anything_. You give a large grin to the First Lieutenant.

"Congratulations First Lieutenant." Hawkeye's cheeks colored only slightly and she nodded her head having no idea that her promotion had only come because of your decision to play it safe.

"Thank you Major." She was clearly trying to make it seem as if she referred to you by your title all the time and not just in front of the doctor. You resisted the urge to scoff; she was the one that normally kept you in order. The doctor finally stopped looking at his clipboard and turned his attention to you.

"Now, how much did you hear us talking about? I don't like to repeat myself."

"I heard from my vitamin deficiency," you answer honestly.

"Then you can understand my concern and why I need to you be taking those vitamins daily if you don't eat a proper amount of food with that particular vitamin in it?"

"I can understand it just fine but it doesn't mean I like it."

"Edward." The colonel was warning you now. You wondered how much stress he had been under that day.

"You'll be staying here until you can keep your food down and I need at least 20 pounds more than you have now."

"20 pounds?! That'll take forever!" You're horrified at the thought of staying in a hospital for that length of time.

"Perhaps in the future if you improve and continue to do so we can make it 15 but as it stands 20." You made some sort of offended noise but the doctor was not having any of your shit. He merely put up a hand and turned to the others in the room, "If you would please step into the hall I would like a few words alone with Edward." You wished they would have stayed, there was an uncomfortable feeling floating around in your stomach and you wanted Mustang to stay. You said nothing as they walked out of the room. The doc merely stared at you when the door closed and you began to fidget.

"What?" You finally asked.

"Are you happy Major?"

"Happy?"

"Yes happy."

"No I'm not happy! How could I be anything like happy? My little brother is missing and I'm missing memories! Does that sound like happy to you?" You could feel anger filling your stomach.

"And why is it that you're feeling anger right now?"

"Because it's completely ludicrous for you to even suggest that I might be happy!" Tears gathered in the corner of your eye.

"Yet you seemed to be quite content with the colonel." This hit you like a slap to the face; you had been enjoying your short stay with the colonel. Al was somewhere out there lost or even worse, with the bastard of a father that you share, and meanwhile you were laughing with Mustang about the toughness of your teacher. Before you could stop them tears were falling from your eyes and onto your fisted hands, "Why are you crying Major?"

"It's not fair…"

"What's not fair?"

"I've taken  _everything_  from him and I repay him by l-laughing and having a great time while he's missing!" You're gasping for air between sobs when a tissue is pushed into your hand. You ignore it and press your fists into your eyes trying to stop the tears.

"Is this perhaps why you feel that you deserve death?" The question was asked with a serious tone but at a low volume. You freeze realizing that this conversation was about the hallucinations.

"It's not like that! It's not! I-I don't think that!" But didn't you? Didn't you deserve a fate worse than death? You took everything from your brother while you remained to live and to soak up everything that life had to offer while he had to watch from the insides of a metal can. You deserved to suffer in the pits of hell because of what you did to him.

"Edward-,"

"NO!" You cut the doctor off you don't want to hear what he had to say, "SHUT UP! SHUT UP!" You're gripping your hair trying to dispel the words from your head but they won't stop bouncing around. You  _did_  deserve death. How could you think that you deserved to live on while Alphonse was suffering so much? You screamed and thrashed your head back and forth trying to get the thoughts out. You didn't  _want_  to hear the truth. You wanted to live in a lie for just a while longer.

"Calm down major," the doctor said in a mild panic as he was not expecting this type of reaction. He gripped your wrists at the same time that the colonel came through the door followed by the two lieutenants.

"NO! STOP!" You clutched your ears trying to block out his annoying baritone voice. You didn't realize that your fingernails were digging into the flesh of your ear so hard that it drew blood.

"Get away from him," It was the colonel speaking. You couldn't take looking at him anymore. You smashed your forehead down into your knees to avoid looking at him, "What did you say to him?" You could hear the mumbles of the shocked doctor who was being backed away from the bed you were in by the First Lieutenant.

"Moron," Havoc muttered as Mustang sighed. You sobbed openly for the first time in a long time, you  _missed_  your brother. You didn't  _deserve_  your brother. You heard the shuffling of feet; Mustang must have ordered the others out of the room. You were alone with him. You crushed your forehead further into your knees hoping that he would leave too.

"Edward, breathe deeper."

"Go, away!" You gasped.

"No," Mustang says clearly and firmly. He lightly takes your wrists in your hands and gives a very light tug, "Listen Edward."

"No!" You don't want to listen to him; you don't want to feel anything but the pain that Al feels.

"Shh, No matter what that stupid teenage brain has cooked up you  _don't_  deserve death."

"Y-Yes I do! A-Alphonse…Al is…"

"Alphonse wants your happiness. That's all he's ever aimed for; he wants you to leave the past in the past because he's already forgiven you."

"No…" You shake your head against your knees.

"Don't you think that if Alphonse was here he'd pull you to your feet and tell you how much of an idiot you're being? Don't you think it would kill him to see you saying that you deserve death? Don't you think that Alphonse is trying as hard as he can to get back to you  _right. Now_? You have no right to die right now because your little brother needs you and you deserve to be happy." You can't take it, Mustang is right, he's always been right. Alphonse would have punched you in the face if he were here. You turn to Mustang and nearly take him off his feet with the force of your head meeting his stomach. You clutch the fabric of his uniform in your shaking hands and you cry loudly into his abdomen. Almost without hesitation, the colonel wraps one arm around your heaving back and the other rests on the back of your head.

"I-I want my brother back!"

"I know that's why you've got to do everything you can to get better okay?" You nod into his stomach still crying, "here, scoot over kid." You do as you're asked and Mustang sits on the cramped bed beside you. You nearly crawl into his lap feeling that for just this moment you want his comfort. You want to indulge in it and be enveloped in it. Perhaps for this night you won't suffer from terrible dreams. You fall asleep almost as soon as your breathing is back under control.

_"Anyway, you guys were off and Trish wasn't paying attention to me, I was still so young it was easy to trick me. I saw something over the hill and just as I got out of the line of sight of any adult I was snagged by a creeper." You are back in the first memory you had, still sitting on that grass with your brother and Chiyo._

_"Then what happened?" Al asked softly._

_"When I woke up I was alone and chained to a wall," She answered her eyes darkening. You knew it was coming, the stories she would dull to sound less horrendous then they were but you had walked in on them while trying to save her. You saw them and because of that you would suffer with her. Chiyo told of the abuse that happened to her trying to make it seem less drastic than it was for Alphonses' sake. However, such things like rape and torture were hard to dumb down and cover up. If Alphonse was in his body he would be crying, that much you knew._

_"Anyway we should talk about happier things!" You and Alphonse remained silent unable to find something to talk about that would make the horrifying tales they had just heard seem less depressing, "I found your dad the other day."_

_"How is that happy news?" You mumble angrily._

_"I thought you were trying to get your bodies back…" She cocked her head to the side looking confused._

_"Well yeah but we don't' need that bastards help to research."_

_"You really don't know why your dad left do you?"_

_"Because he's a bastard who only thinks about his work instead of his family!" You stand but Chiyo grabs your hand and prevents you from walking away._

_"That's not true aniki," She said with such a sad face it made you stop and allow yourself to be pulled back down to the grass, "all he thinks about his you guys. He just is so scared to touch you-,"_

_"Why?" Alphonse interrupts._

_"….Hohenheim of Light is…a philosophers stone."_

_"Are you serious?" Chiyo nodded with a dead serious look in her eye._

_"He didn't want to cause anything to happen to you guys, he loves you so much and he has no idea how to show it."_

_"I don't care!" you shout, "He_ left _us! He didn't even come back for her funeral."_

_"It's not my job to make you forgive your dad aniki that's something you two need to talk about. All I'm saying is that you need him to get your bodies back. He can open the gate, along with me, without causing an equivalent exchange that is too big to handle."_

_"Along with your help? Why can't he do it alone?" Alphonse asked before you could speak up._

_"I guess it's about time I told you why I was kidnapped and not just about it…"_

_"What do you mean?" you asked certain that it was slave traders that had taken her._

_"For as long as I could remember I could perform alchemy. I've never once read a text book, hell I still can't even read I was never taught. I can do anything with Alchemy though. The first time I remember using it was when I was running from a wild dog…I was so scared I was only three. For some reason I thought, 'if only I could just fly away to another time I would be okay.' Then I clapped my hands and I saw so many things flash around me and before I knew it, I was in a field twenty minutes before the dog had ever started chasing me. That was the first time I preformed Time and Space Alchemy."_

_"No way, something like that is only supposed to exist in legends…."_

_"Every three millennia the gate chooses a child to take on this burden. I'm not even sure what it wants me to do with this alchemy besides appear in front of it every year for a birthday. He just wants someone to talk to I suppose. He does get kinda lonely."_

_"But how would that help dad?" Al asked curious._

_"Philosophers stones were created by the very first Time and Space Alchemist. The Alchemist now a day's are only trying to recreate that philosophers stone. The closest they've come is Hohenheim. We naturally go together. The philosopher's stone is connected to the gate which I am able to access through Time and Space Alchemy. The gate owes me for all those birthdays and errand trips I've made so I can afford to pull out a body and a couple of limbs but I need the sustaining power of the stone. If your dad and I work together with Ed's Alchemy we can definitely get your bodies back."_

For the first time after seeing a memory you feel yourself waking up peacefully. Even though you can feel the dried tear tracks on your face you are feeling very comfortable and you almost don't open your eyes. At the sound of a camera shutter though you force your eyes open.

"Hughes what the hell?! Did you take a picture of me?" Upon seeing Hughes' grin you realize that not only did Hughes take a picture of you he took a picture of  _you_  sleeping on  _Mustang's_  lap! Your face colored when the photo printed out of the camera and Hughes waved it back and forth to dry the ink.

"Aw that's going in the photo album!"

"NO! Rip it up!" You wake the colonel with your shout and as you try to get to the end of the bed he wraps an arm around your waist. He pulls you back just as the blanket catches around your foot and you nearly tumble off the bed.

"Calm down Edward. Hughes what have you done to upset him now?" Mustang rubs an eye and then places the hand on your forehead.

"Nothing, nothing!"

"He's a liar! He took a -,"

"Anyway Roy!" Hughes spoke over you, "I've got Edo's food coming up so I just thought I should wake you up before anyone else saw you!"

"Thanks Hughes," Roy yawned and you couldn't believe that Hughes was tucking the picture away in his shirt pocket. Roy slid off the bed and stretched plucking the photograph out of Hughes' pocket as he did.

"HEY!"

"BURN IT!" You yelled.

"You owe me Roy! For the first night and the help!" Hughes said before Roy could snap his now gloved fingers. You had no idea what the man was talking about but clearly Mustang did. He hesitated long enough for you to become anxious.

"Mustang…burn it!"

"I'll just put it in the album! No need to show it around!" Mustang sighed through his nose and gave you an apologetic look before shoving it back into Hughes' pocket. You snorted and cross your arms.

"Fine I won't tell you about what I remembered. It's important too!" This seemed to catch both of their attention.

"Edward," Mustang's voice deepened and you nearly fidgeted at the warning underneath the tone.

"You shouldn't use stuff like that as bargaining chips cause you'll lose there, kiddo." Hughes crossed his arms and sat on one of the hard plastic chairs. A clear statement of, 'I'm not going anywhere until I hear this.'

"Then destroy the picture and I'll talk."

"No Ed, this isn't something to be bargaining with. You want to find your brother no?" You feel your stomach tighten at Hughes' words and you frown. There is a knock on the door just as you are about to break.

"Good morning Major Elric, I've got breakfast here for you as well as some medication that we'd like you to take." A nurse balances the tray and a bottle of water while entering the room. You recognize her as the nurse that was normally assigned to you when you landed your stupid ass in the hospital.

"R-Right…" you mumble looking at the white cup of pills and the plate of various foods. She uncaps a bottle of water and sets it on the tray as well.

"I managed to convince them to drop the milk and give you water instead," she winked at you and you blushed lightly looking away with a quiet, "thank you." You weren't stupid this was the same woman that forced needles in your arm and could flip from this likable personality to dictator in a second.

"If you would give us some privacy please we are in the middle of a classified conversation," Mustang said as you took a sip of the water finding it to be chilled.

"No can do Colonel," She said with a head shake and a tutting finger, "I've got to make sure he eats and takes his medication!"

"I can make sure he does that," Mustang said with a charming smile, "You can take a quick break if you'd like." She blushed at the smile but looked wearily at you.

"I've at least got to make sure he takes his medication…"

"Ed," you found it to amazing that the colonel could give an order to you just by using the first two letters of your name. You frowned wishing you didn't have to try and down the stupid things but when the colonel raised his eyebrow you knew you didn't have much of a choice. Nearly five minutes later you had a small sip of the water left but the pills were down. Another chilled water bottle was produced from one of her many pockets and she smiled warmly at you.

"Open up Major Elric I've got to make sure you didn't hide them anywhere."

"Shit you can do that?" You were such a dumbass! You could have been hiding pills the whole time, no one had checked before.

"Not anymore," Mustang answered as you opened your mouth and lifted your tongue. You glared at Mustang as the nurse declared you to be free of her presence. As soon as the door clicked shut Mustang looked pointedly at the food on the tray and you stabbed a piece of pineapple with your fork and ate it. You eyed the rest of the tray which seemed to be slightly sketchy. There was a large egg, dried soy beans, which you didn't think you'd be eating, peas, banana slices, some sort of nut, something that looked like a dry bean, you didn't think you'd be eating that either, and a whole grain muffin. It appeared that the pineapple and the banana were going to be the best part of the meal so you decided to save them for last. Only after you had eaten some of the food on the tray did Hughes and Mustang start questioning you.

"What did you remember Ed?" Hughes asked.

"Stuff about Chiyo and Hohenheim," You said while looking for something that could be orange juice but finding nothing.

"Care to put in some details there Edward?" You sighed through your nose but stabbed the yolk of your egg as you started the story.

"…Ed…I know you don't really want to hear this," Hughes started after you finished the talking. You felt dirty for telling them about Chiyo's kidnapping, "We need to let the hospital staff know so they can test Chiyo for any sexually transmitted diseases."

"No! They'll think she wanted it! They'll think it was her fault and I'm not going to put her through that! I can't!"

"Ed if she has something then she could die from it."

"It's been six years Lieutenant Colonel! I was ten when I found her!" Mustang's head snapped in your direction.

"You saw?" Your voice became thick and you couldn't force words out so you just nodded.

"Ed…." Hughes trailed off when Mustang held up a hand to stop him.

"You tried to protect her didn't you?"

"I couldn't…I was so weak…as soon as I stepped in I was hit and I went down. She was just laying there dying and in pain and I didn't do anything but sob to the police that Al called for." You swiped angrily at the tears in your eyes.

"You tried Ed, that's all she could ask for. Most people wouldn't have done anything at all but you did."

"It wasn't enough! She was still there for years! YEARS! I c-couldn't find her! I-I didn't protect her!"

"But you saved her." Mustang tilted your head up with a curled finger, " _you_  saved  _her_. She's alive right now because of you and to make sure she's going to be okay you need to let us have them look at her." You shook your head it was  _wrong_  to let them look  _there_  without her permission.

"I have to ask her…"

"Ed…she's in a coma…"

"She talked to me once! She can do it again!" The two men looked at each other hesitantly but you were already putting the tray to the side to go see her.

"Whoa Ed, wait," Hughes started.

"You'll finish your food before you go anywhere," Mustang ordered as he pushed you back to the bed by your shoulders.

"…you'll let me talk to her?"

"If, and only if you eat everything on that tray." Today was a pretty okay day for your stomach you thought. You eyed the few things you had left…that would mean you would have to eat the nasty bean things…For Chiyo it was worth it. You ate everything in record time and you were shuffling to your feet.

"Put the slippers on Edward." Roy placed them in front of you after snagging them from the foot of your bed. You slipped them on and would have ripped the needle out of your arm if it wasn't for Hughes who was quick enough to snag the IV line and walk with you.

"…Ah! Major Elric isn't supposed to be out of bed!" The same nurse that brought the tray was now running after you.

"We are just getting the major some exercise," Mustang said with another charming smile, "He is getting quite restless after that nutritious breakfast." You rolled your eyes at the site of her blush.

"He really shouldn't be out of bed…"

"As soon as he gets tired we'll take him back," Hughes promised her. She bit her lower lip worried but nodded anyway, mainly because you were still power walking away. It was all too soon that you were standing in Chiyo's room. Hughes must have sensed your hesitance because he offered to go get coffee. When Mustang was about to step out after him you grabbed his sleeve. Something told you he needed to stay.

"Ne, Chiyo," you leaned against her bed, "I've got a favor to ask."

"…"

"This guy here is Colonel Roy Mustang…I know I've told you a bit about him before…nothing too nice I'm sure, but he's been takin' care of me lately. Doin' a pretty shitty job seeing as though I'm back here." You ignored Mustangs offended look.

"…"

"Anyway I just wanted to let you know that despite his utter asshole aura I trust him…a lot." You refused to look at Mustang at this point, "I remembered…that first time you told Al why you disappeared…what happened to you, I remembered that too. I'm sorry I couldn't protect you." Fuck you were tearing up.

"…" She still wasn't answering.

"I told him…I told him what happened and he wants to make sure you aren't sick from it…He wants to let the doctors do some tests to make sure you don't have any….what was it?" This time you look to Mustang to see that he looked a little misty eyed as well.

"Sexually transmitted diseases." He answered with a husky voice.

"Yeah one of those," you agree, "I figure it's your choice because it's your body so what do you say? I know you can hear me so don't pretend that you can't." You brush her long bangs out of her face and she opens her eyes a little.

"…Okay." She answers with a weak voice, "Because I trust you aniki so I can trust him too right?"

"Yeah you can trust him."

"Okay…you can let them…"

"Okay…I'm sorry."

"Don't be I was stupid enough to go off on my own. You came after me though…that's all I really wanted you know."

"Ahh." You tried to agree.

"Aniki, don't cry…" She cupped the side of your face with a weak hand and her eyes flickered over to Mustang.

"It's nice to meet you Mr. Mustang…I've heard a lot about you my name's Reichiyo but you can call me Chiyo."

"Nice to meet you."

"Please keep this a secret, they can't know I've woken up yet…"

"The homunculi?" You asked. She nodded. Her gaze shifted towards the door and she smiled softly at you.

"I've got to go back to the gate now okay….the doctors are coming they think something's wrong so you should go before they find you."

"Okay, I'll see you soon." She nodded.

"You just gotta remember everything else first then I'll come with you."

"Okay. Sleep tight."

"Will do." Her hand fell back to the bed and her eyes slid shut the vitals next to her dropping again. It was too late to leave the room you could hear the doctors in the hallway. At least the machines were easy to trick. You placed your hand on one of the sensors and used the other hand to wipe at your face. The colonel caught on quickly and he placed his hand on your shoulder making it look like he was telling you it was time to go when the doctors came in the room.

"C-Colonel! Major! What are you doing in here?" One of the doctors asked as she circled around to check Chiyo's vitals.

"Just making a visit…sorry I think I messed with the machine…" you mumbled as you removed your hand from the suctioned wire.

"Ahh that's what it was…we thought for a moment that she woke up…" You shook your head but you looked to the colonel.

"Would you ask them to…do that?" He nodded and you picked up your IV line and walked into the hallway. You leaned against the wall just as Hughes came back with two cups of coffee. You could hear the doctor's scurry around the room as Mustang made the request.

"I'm tired…" You told Hughes as he stood next to you. You laid your head against the wall loving how cool it felt against your skin. You didn't even jump at the hand on your forehead it was almost expected at this point.

"You still have a fever…" Mustang was back now, he grabbed your IV line and he nudged you to walk forward. You slowly made your way back to the small hospital room and you laid back down honestly tired from the small walk.

"Ed, stay awake for a couple of minutes okay."

"Mmmhum." You mumbled as you buried your face into your pillow.

"Listen…are you listening?"

"I'm listening."

"I've got to go to the office for a few hours today so I might not be here when you wake up."

"…Kay…"

"Do what the staff tells you to do, got it?"

"Yeah."

"Eat what they give you."

"Mmm."

"If there's a problem the office is only ten minutes away."

"Problem?"

"If you need me I'm ten minutes away."

"Hmm." You were giving in to sleep at this point. You felt your hair being gently ruffled and you are assuming that Hughes said something to tease Mustang because you heard the ignition cloth slide together for a moment. You were much too tired to care so you let yourself sleep.

_"Alright on the count of three Chiyo."_

_"Okay."_

_"One." They both changed their stance._

_"Two," Chiyo counted. They both clapped their hands together._

_"Three," they said in unison and placed their hands on the circle at the same time. Hohenheim's golden hair disappeared in the flash of light for a moment but after a few seconds he was back and handing over the majority of the transmutation to Chiyo._

_"Hold on a little longer Al!" She called out as the transmutation became under her complete control. Hohenheim stepped out of the circle with a slight glimmer of sweat around his forehead. You sat on the same cold windowsill that he had placed you on earlier, fidgeting. You heard a scream come from Al and you jolted off of the cold surface in seconds. Before you could even take a step Hohenheim had his arms around you and he held you to his chest._

_"Let go! Al!"_

_"Edward I said you have to stay there no matter what."_

_"Al's hurting!"_

_"He's fine. It's probably more shock than anything Chiyo is very good about keeping things pain free."_

_"B-But…"_

_"Calm down and stay back."_

_"…Let go!" You were wiggling halfheartedly in his grip. Hohenheim frowned and placed the back of his hand on your forehead._

_"You have a fever."_

_"I'm fine!"_

_"Edward you don't understand, you might not be able to make it out of this transmutation if you're sick."_

_"I'm fine!" You were spun around and Hohenheim gripped your shoulders with a worried look in his eyes._

_"You cannot enter that circle until you are well." It was an order not a request and it had you biting your lip._

_"…"_

_"Do you understand me?"_

_"Yeah…I understand." Hohenheim searched your eyes for a moment before nodding and placing his coat around your shoulders. The light from the transmutation died down and laying in the middle of the circle was Al's naked body. You tried to rush after him to place a coat around his shoulders but you were pushed to sit by Hohenheim._

_"You. Are. Not. To. Enter. That. Circle." He repeated._

_"He's my brother!"_

_"I'm aware. Stay here I will get him." You frowned but one look from Chiyo had you doing as he ordered. He gingerly wrapped Al up in blankets and coats and he added four layers of socks as well._

_"Is he okay?"_

_"Yeah he's good." Chiyo answered looking tired._

_"Come on we're going back to the base now."_

_"But what about aniki?"_

_"He's got a fever." Chiyo was at your side in seconds with her hand on your forehead._

_"That's not good aniki…"_

_"I'll be okay." You smiled at her and she frowned with a slight shake of the head._

_"You wouldn't be if you entered that circle…" She sighed and cracked her knuckles, "You should sleep some."_

_"I will later," your eyes went to Al's form. He was looking awfully small in all those clothes, especially since Hohenheim was holding him._

_"You're a liar…" Chiyo lightly clapped her hands and moved one of them toward your head._

_"…Wh-What are you doing?" You backed up only to hit the wall._

_"Moving your conscious mind through its own time and space to what we like to call dream land."_

_"Chiyo! Don't!" It was too late she touched your temple and you slumped to the ground immediately. The last thing you heard was,_

_"Can you carry two?"_

" _Shhh You'll wake brother…"_

_"Yeah wouldn't want him waking up in that position." In what position? What was Chiyo talking about? All you knew that was for as crappy as you felt you were pretty comfortable._

_"I don't think Dad would make it out alive…" Alphonse sounded worried. You cracked an eye open and noticed a golden beard above you. Holy mother of god, you were laying in the bastards lap. You struggled to sit up but he held you down by your shoulders._

_"Now, now you were sleeping just fine a minute ago. Go back to sleep."_

_"Let me go damn it!" You struggled against the old man but you fell into a coughing fit before you could get up. "Are you getting enough air Aniki?" Chiyo sounded so worried that you smiled toward her and nodded, "liar." She pouted when you started wheezing._

_"Dad, we can't do the transmutation until brother is better because he might not make it right?" Alphonse shifted on his small bed where he was wrapped up in several different cloths._

_"Yes…"_

_"So let Chiyo do the transmutation so brother can get more air…we're at a pretty high altitude and by the time that he gets better she'll have the energy back…" Al offered._

_"I don't see what the harm is…go for it Reichiyo." She wrinkled her nose and your eyes shifted suspiciously between the three of them._

_"You don't have to use my full name…I don't like it much anyway." She clapped her hands anyway and held them out in front of her. The space around you shimmered and you noticed that you were incased in something that resembled ice. You knocked a finger against it and realized that it was as hard as crystal. That was right, Chiyo specialized in two different types of alchemy, the first being Crystal Ice alchemy which she created by mixing the oxygen and water particles in the air. As it dissipated back into the air it released a form of pure oxygen which you had to admit, was helping your breathing a lot. The second was the Time and Space Alchemy. Your eyes landed on Alphonse's human flesh and you smiled softly forgetting for a moment whose lap your head was resting on._

_"How are you feeling Al?"_

_"Just tired, Brother. You should get some sleep too so you can get your arm and leg back."_

_"…Yeah…" You were already falling asleep and damn it all you feel back asleep with your head still resting on the bastards lap._

"Chief? Hey wake up…" You groaned and rolled over hitting something plastic and cold. It felt too cold on your skin and you moaned, moving away from it, "Hey how are you feeling?"

"Havoc?"

"Yeah it's me Chief."

"Where's Mustang?"

"Stuck at the office for lunch but he'll be here later."

"Oh." You had yet to open your eyes they were burning with fatigue.

"Can you sit up? Maybe eat some lunch?" You shook your head, "Can you try?"

"'M so tired," you groan.

"I know, can you try opening your eyes? It's not very bright in here." Hesitantly you peak through your lashes to see that it is fairly dark, the curtains are drawn and the fluorescents aren't on. A dimmer, yellowish light is on and you are able to open your eyes without pain.

"Can't I eat later?"

"Nope, it'll be nice and easy Chief. They've got some soup and a turkey sandwich with avocado here. There's also some steamed broccoli."

"My stomach feels terrible," you groan. It wasn't a lie either it really did feel terrible. You think you ate too much at breakfast.

"I still need you to try there Chief." Havoc's hands are under your shoulders lifting you with his surprising strength. The man had arms like train engines. They were strong, powerful, and they never seemed to stop working. You were leaned against the pillows and you blinked blearily as the tray was placed in front of you.

"I can do it," you snapped as Havoc tried to lift your spoon for you. You managed a couple bites of everything and Havoc managed to convince you to eat all of the avocado on your sandwich, it apparently was how you would get the B6 vitamin. You tried to keep it down, mainly because you wanted to leave this place as soon as possible. Ten minutes later you were asking for a bowl which you almost made it into. Most of it ended up on you and some in the bowl but the first up heaves of partially digested food made it to the floor. At this point your stomach started revolting against you and you couldn't lie still long enough for the doctor to diagnose the problem so they added something to your IV that made you extremely relaxed. You were able to close your eyes and sleep for a while. At least until this annoying sensation of something between your toes woke you up.

"He's angry…" you heard Havoc but you couldn't really see him. Your eyes were only able to open just slightly and you weren't really able to register what was happening. You could feel warm pressure on either side of your head and you wondered if maybe someone was holding your- oh there was that annoying sensation again. The hands on the sides of your head shifted as you made a noise of irritation.

"He's just irritated is all, he'd be asleep he wasn't so ticklish in the feet." Why was this lady bugging your ticklish feet? What was she doing anyway? The annoying feeling moved up your leg and you tried to move your leg away but it was held firmly in place.

"Do you really have to do this every day?"

"Of course, it wouldn't have been as bad if he hadn't of thrown up but he still needs to be bathed daily." A bath? It didn't feel like a bath-oooohhh there was that annoying feeling on the other foot! You wished it would go away because you would love to sleep. You made another irritated noise and tried to jerk your foot away.

"Why can't he tell what's going on?" Havoc seemed a little worried and what the hell was he there for a bath anyway? Hell why was there a lady there? The hell was goin-damn that sensation!

"He was having quite a fit earlier due to that stomach pain so we administered a drug that makes him very relaxed, it'll take a while to work its way out of his system but Mr. Elric isn't exactly a new patient and it's much easier to bathe him when he can't fight back." Wait did that mean this happened every time you-fuck what the hell was that? It was moving up your leg now. It was so annoying you just wanted to swat it away but you couldn't find the strength to raise an arm. Speaking of arms, your arm was now being attacked by the annoying feeling. You're fairly certain that the noise that came from your throat was not as annoyed as you wanted it to be. Instead it sounded more like a high pitched sound of distress. You didn't even know you could reach that octave. For a little bit you were able to fall asleep and rest. You were woken again by an annoying sensation between your toes. You tried to pull your foot away but it was tugged back and firmly held between something soft.

"Ahh the medication is starting to wear off, he's able to fight back a little now Mr. Havoc. We'd better dry him off quickly."

"Uh Yeah…" Ugh now there was another annoying feeling in your underarm. You jerked your arm away and nearly won the fight with whoever was annoying you.

"Careful don't let him hurt himself."

"Right! Sorry!" The sensations disappeared and you fell back asleep.

"Don't be embarrassed he won't even remember this when he wakes up." You tugged your foot away when a sensation of something being slipped over your foot woke you again.

"…You're sure?"

"Absolutely."

You woke several hours later from the sponge bath that you have no memory of at all. Although you did feel clean but you just assumed that was because someone had actually braided your hair instead of sticking it in the ponytail that the hospital staff seemed to favor. You suspected Havoc. You wiggled your feet out of the socks that had somehow appeared on your feet and left them to sit for an eternity underneath the covers. Your body felt heavy and your stomach wasn't exactly on friendly terms with you but you weren't lunging for a bowl. It was then that you realized something was off. This had to of been the first time you woke up alone.

Instantly your stomach knotted with nerves, something didn't seem right. On slightly unsteady feet you made your way to the door, IV in hand. The hallway seemed normal if not a bit too bright but there was still no one there. You made your way around several corners and that was when you heard the noise. It wasn't really panicked just hurried and short clipped speech that made you think something was wrong. You turned the last corner and nearly threw up on the spot. Maes Hughes was being wheeled around the very same corner bloody and unconscious. You had  _just_  spoken with the man a few hours ago and now…what had happened?

"Hu-Hughes? HUGHES!" You screamed gaining the attention of hospital staff.

"Major Elric! Major please you have to return to your room!"

"No! Hughes!" You fought the arms that were trying to get you to walk away.

"Edward?" The broken voice of Colonel Mustang made you stop and you turned sharply placing a palm on the wall next to you to keep your balance as the room spun.

"Co-Colonel….what happened?"

"…He was attacked while trying to get some information to me. I tracked him down to a phone booth and called for help…"

"…Is he going to be okay?" You hated how your voice cracked.

"…I don't know."

**Hahaha take that! I don't update for forever and now I'm feeling evil! Now, review! Review my readers!**

**(I apologize for the lateness of this chapter and hope its slightly longer length makes things okay!)**


	10. Set Backs

## Chapter 10

# Set backs

                You were sitting in a lump at the top of your hospital bed with the covers pulled over your head.  You were feeling lost and confused, why did something this terrible have to happen to Hughes of all people?  What had he been doing so late at night anyway?  Was it perhaps something you said while talking to him?  This whole thing could be _your_ fault and Gracia and Elysia could be left _alone_ because of something that _you_ said!  You felt the bed sink down a bit as it accepted the weight of another person. 

                “Edward,” it was the colonel.  He put his hand on your shoulder and you were finally able to tell how much you were shaking.  Sweat was running down your face and you could feel the sticky heat of your own exhales coming back against your face.  It was suffocating.  The blanket was peeled back from your face and you welcomed the cool air.  When you saw the colonel’s face you knew you weren’t the only one suffering from these symptoms. 

                “Colonel…” Your voice broke and your lower lip trembled.   He pulled you up to his side and wrapped an arm around your shoulders.  You took comfort in the awkward hug by wrapping your arms around his waist and clutching the fabric there, “…Colonel I don’t know what to do.”  You whimpered.

                “Me either,” his voice cracked.  Your sniffle stopped halfway through, you never thought you would see the day where Colonel Roy Mustang didn’t know what to do, or the right orders to give.               

“…What if…what if it’s my fault?”

                “What on earth would possess you to say that?”

                “Maybe I shouldn’t have shared so much of my memories with him…I should have only told you.”

                “Ed that’s ridiculous if anything I’m to blame, I’m the one who asked him to look into some of these things.”

                “Both of you are being ridiculous.”

                “Ch-Chiyo!”  You were shocked to see the small girl standing, rather wobbly, in the doorway.  She clutched the frame and her side, “Yo-You’re awake?”

                “It’s time for me to be here now,” She groaned in pain, “Holy hell, can I sit there?”  She pointed to the edge of the bed.  You released the colonel and scooted over, your cheeks tinged with pink. 

                “Yeah, yeah sure.”  She hobbled over to the spot and with help from the colonel she was up on the bed.

                “Ahh that’s nice,” She sighed in relief.  She turned serious after a moment, “You two are being stupid, neither one of you told Hughes to go out in the middle of the night and neither one of you told him that the person who went with him was a homunculi.”

                “How do you know that?” The colonel asked.

                “The gate?” You asked.

                “You didn’t think I spent all that time with it for fun did you?”  She asked while crossing her arms.

                “You got information?”

                “I have to be really careful with what I tell you Aniki, it’s one of the agreement terms.  But I felt like I needed _something_ to help out with.  I mean I can’t use Time and Space Alchemy for another ten years so we’re stuck with whatever you and this guy,” she gestured to the colonel, “can pull out of your asses.” 

                “What can you tell us?” the colonel asked before you could say anything.  She sighed and leaned back against one of the support bars. 

                “I can tell you that Hughes is going to be okay in a few weeks but he’s going to be out of commission for a while.  I can also tell you that the homunculi have started to notice that you,” She points to you, “are lying somewhat about remembering the transmutation.” 

                “Do you know what happened?  Why does it seem like the homunculi were there?”

                “Probably because they were.  I don’t actually know anything about that though…I was hoping that you would be able to remember and tell _me_ what happened.  All I know is that I suddenly ran out of energy and I was out just after the circle became self sustaining.  It basically started moving forward and taking my future energy as payment which is what caused the coma well…most of it.” 

                “Most of it?”

                “I can’t really go into further detail cause I don’t really understand it.” 

                “I see.”   There were several loud voices passing in the hallway. 

                “Oops, they found out I’m missing ~.” Chiyo sang.  She giggled and laid her head on your lap as the door quietly opened.

                “Major Elric we were- ah,” the nurse at the door looked absolutely shocked to see the missing patient with you, “Miss! You aren’t supposed to be out of bed!  You’ve only just woken up your muscles can’t take this strain.”

                “I wanna stay here,” Chiyo pouted and clutched your leg as the nurse drew closer. 

                “Please, we’re family,” you said knowing this would be the only way to allow Chiyo to stay in the room as well.

                “I thought your only sibling was your brother,” she placed her hands on her hips and was now glaring, suspecting a lie.

                “We grew up together in the same house, you don’t have to be blood related to be family,” you said while placing your hand on Chiyo’s head.  The nurse sighed and shook her head.

                “I’ll talk to my boss but for now-,”

                “For now please allow her to stay here, I do need to talk with this girl as well,” Mustang said while standing.  A light blush dusted the cheeks of the nurse and she sighed again.

                “Very well.”

                “And if you wouldn’t mind, would you be able to find out the status of Lieutenant Colonel Hughes?” 

                “I’ll check although it’s still a little early we might not have any information for you.”

                “Just checking would be a lot of help to me.”

                “I be back…”  She sighed and left the room. 

                “We have about ten minutes so anything important should be said now,” Mustang said.

                “Right…well there is the fact that the homunculi are after Hohenheim…”

                “Why?”  You asked confused.

                “Because he’s a philosopher’s stone and they need him because of it. Hohenheim is one of the first philosophers stones created; they want to try and use that to their advantage and become human.  Well that’s not entirely true…I suppose some of them genuinely want to become human but I know that Envy for example is after something a little…more.”

                “Like what?” you ask. 

                “…He wants to spread chaos to Hohenheim and all associated with him…like his kids…”

                “…Oh god…Alphonse is with him!”  You started to panic.

                “Calm down Aniki!  Hohenheim is _good_ at hiding.  They’ve been looking for him for years, the only reason they got somewhat of a lead was because he stayed in Risembool for so long.  That’s why he left you!  He was trying to protect you guys by leaving.  He’ll protect Al with his life I know it,” Chiyo struggled to sit up and clasp your shaking hands in her steady ones. 

                “Then how are _we_ supposed to find him?!”

                “He’ll find us.  When the time is right he’ll come here and bring Al home.”

                “No!  I don’t trust him!”

                “I’m not asking you to trust him; I’m asking you to trust me when I say he’ll bring Al home.”  You sat with conflicting emotions, half of you wanted to believe what Chiyo was saying and the other didn’t think that you would ever see your brother again.  She placed her hand on the side of you face and you sighed giving in to the touch.

                “Yeah, okay I trust you,” You mumbled.  She smiled softly and turned to Mustang.

                “Thanks for taking care of him.  I don’t think you’re doing a shitty job, I just think that he’s too stubborn for his own good,” She said with a smirk.

                “Brat,” you mumbled while slightly brushing your knuckles against her shoulder. 

                “I just wanted to let you guys know that they said those tests came back clean, I’m not…infected or anything…surprisingly.”  You felt the tears prick at your eyes and you immediately looked to the ceiling. 

                “That’s good,” Mustang said softly.  She grinned brightly;

                “Isn’t it!”

                “…What next?” You asked.         

                “Next?  You get better and we wait…this will probably be the hardest part.”

                “Waiting?”

                “No, getting you to sit in the hospital for more than an hour,” she teased. 

                “Like you’re any better,” you grumbled.  The attention turned to the light knock on the door and the nurse from a few minutes ago entered. 

                “Lieutenant Colonel Hughes is out of danger but he’s got a long recovery ahead of him.  If you were any later in getting there Colonel, I’m sure he wouldn’t of made it.”  You sighed in relief and Mustang’s shoulders sagged in relief as well.

                “Thank you very much for looking into that for me,” Mustang said his voice lighter than previously.         

                “Of course, and Mr. Elric and Miss…”

                “You can call me Chiyo,” Chiyo answered as she rolled onto her side to look at the nurse.

                “You two received the permission to stay in a double room with each other.  We’ll move you there in a bit, it’s just getting a wipe down,” She said while moving in to take Chiyo’s temperature. 

                “Thank you,” Mustang said while Chiyo wrinkled her nose.

                “You mean I actually have to stay here?”  The nurse blinked a little shocked.

                “My dear, you just came out of a coma you are far from able to just walk out and go home.  How you even managed to get to this room on your own astounds me.”  Chiyo groaned and laid her head back down on your lap making you chuckle.

                “Nothing to tease me with now is there?” You said with a slightly smug tone. 

                Forty minutes later you were moved into a double room with Chiyo who had taken it upon herself to try walking again when the nurse and Mustang had stepped out.  You nearly snorted with laughter when she almost slipped and was forced to lean against the wall for support.

                “Holy hell, how _did_ I get down to your room on my own?  This is hard!” 

                “I think part of your problem is that IV line…” You chuckled.  The IV was starting to pull on her wrist and she frowned when she noticed.

                “This thing should be on wheels!”  She tried to tug the stand towards her but only succeeded in making it tip and crash to the ground.  She jumped and pulled the needle out before shuffling back into bed.  She pulled the covers over her legs just as a nurse hurried in.

                “What on earth happened?!”  She asked while righting the fallen stand.

                “There’s a ghost!”  Chiyo exclaimed.  You held your hand to your mouth trying hard to keep your laughter in. 

                “…A _ghost_.”  The nurse said with a dead look in her eye and a serious face.

                “Yep!  The stand just up and moved on its own and then it floated and _fell_!” 

                “I have to give her credit,” You jumped when Mustang whispered in your ear, “She’s actually selling that pretty well.” 

                “Who do you think she learned from?”  You snorted. 

                “And I’m supposed to assume that the ghost just so conveniently slipped the needle out of place too?”

                “Yes ma’am!” Chiyo said with a clumsy salute.   

                “Miss, if I catch you out of bed I’ll make sure you can’t get up again.”

                “Oh my, if I didn’t know any better that would sound like a threat!”  Chiyo gasped.

                “No miss, it’s a promise.” 

                “Are you any good at keeping your promises?”

                “Would you like to find out?”

                “Not really!” Chiyo grinned and offered her arm when the nurse grabbed a sterile needle and attached it to a new line. 

                “Then I suggest you behave.  That goes for you as well Mr. Elric.” 

                “W-What? I didn’t do anything!” 

                “It was merely a warning to keep behaving.”  She expertly attached the IV to Chiyo again and gave both of you a warning look before leaving. 

                “Do I even want to know what was really going on?”  Mustang asked an amused grin on his face.

                “Chiyo was practicing walking.”  You mumbled slightly upset at being chastised for nothing.

                “You should practice when someone is here to help you, you could get hurt you know,” Mustang warned her.

                “Yeah but that takes all the fun out it!  Where’s the danger in having a safety net?”  Chiyo pouted.  Mustang just shook his head then placed his hand on your head.

                “Try to get some sleep before dinner.  I’ll be back to check on you after I get some work done.”

                “Are you actually going to work or are you going to procrastinate?”

                “How can I procrastinate with a gun in my face?  Hawkeye is taking her promotion very seriously.”   You laughed and wiped an imaginary tear from your eye.

                “I bet she is.” 

                “Brat, get some sleep,” Mustang said with a light teasing tone.  He looked up to say his farewells to Chiyo but stopped when he noticed that she was already sleeping.  Instead he turned to leave when you grabbed his sleeve.

                “…She can stay with us can’t she?  After we get out?”  You freeze; you just assumed that you would be staying with the colonel even after you got better.  He was going to turn you down and call you a stupid fool or something!  You knew it!

                “How could I turn down that face?”  Mustang smirked.  You quickly wiped the pleading look off of your face and released his sleeve.  You turned your head to the side and crossed your arms shocked that he basically said that you could continue living with him.

                “…Thanks…”  But why did you want to stay with him?

                “Not a problem kid,” Mustang said, “Take a _short_ nap and we can talk later.”  Your head snapped back to face him and your eyebrow twitched.

                “Is that supposed to be some sort of joke?”

                “Not at _all_.”  Mustang said his voice heavy with sarcasm. 

                “I’m _not_ SHORT!”  You yelled.  Mustang waved his finger back and forth in front of your face.    

                “Now, now Eddy, you can’t be yelling when there’s a lady sleeping in the room.”

                “Shut up.”  You growled.  Mustang ruffled your hair and turned to walk out.

                “Go to sleep kiddo.”

                “Yeah, whatever,” You groaned as you sunk down on the bed eyelids already heavy.   The next time you joined the conscious world was as Havoc forced you awake by roughly shaking your shoulder. You grumbled incoherently and turned on your side only to be pulled back over by the same abused shoulder. 

                “Chief, get up.  The nursing staff left me to deal with you so you better behave!”  

                “I’m not getting up,” You groaned fingers reaching for the blankets.  Havoc yanked them away and you groaned as he tugged your shoulder back over to him.

                “You need to eat there chief.”

                “My stomach hurts,” you groaned hoping that the churning in your stomach would settle soon.  Otherwise you were sure that you would need a toilet. 

                “…Do you need to get to the bathroom?”  Havoc asked sounding as if he was unsure about your credibility. 

                “Just gimme a second,” you grumble hoping that the gurgling and spinning will stop.  Havoc settled beside you, and you closed your eyes tightly, trying to dispel the feeling of sickness.  You took slow breaths out of your mouth and tried to force back down your small baby barf.

                “Chief?” 

                “Yeah, I need the bathroom,” You groaned when you couldn’t contain the feeling.  Havoc’s hands were on you immediately.  He was helping you sit up and helping you to stand and he even carried your IV stand for you.  Before you knew it you were crying hot tears, and puking hot stomach acid into the toilet.  Havoc’s hand was lightly running back and forth over your back and his other hand held loose locks of your hair.  With a splash and a gag the last of anything liquid and solid that was in your stomach was forced into the toilet.  A deep gag forced more hot tears to your eyes and the salty liquid spilled down your equally hot cheeks. 

                “Alright, that all you have left chief?”  You gagged in reply.  Your whole body was shaking at this point and you welcomed the cold rag that was being dragged over your face.  It was folded and the clean side was wiped over your eyes and forehead, then cheeks.  You shuddered and leaned shakily against Havoc who was unwavering in his squatted position even with the added weight you gave him.  He merely wrapped an arm around your shoulders and took your weight completely. 

                “Alright Chief, calm down,” Havoc said while maneuvering his hands around your legs and the IV line. 

                “M-My chest hurts,” You wheezed.  The pain was sharp and it became even more so with each beat, “Ung, it hurts to breathe!”  

                “Okay, calm down, I’m going to pick you up okay…”

                “Nng, it _hurts_ ,” you gasped trying to bring air in.  You weren’t sure how Havoc did it, mainly because your eyes were closed, but he had you in his arms and was handling the IV as well.  You noticed that Havoc was built like the colonel; he just applied his muscles more than the colonel’s who you wouldn’t know had such muscle unless you could feel the arm or if he wasn’t wearing his jacket.  The pain intensified and your fingers twisted into Havoc’s jacket.   You groaned when he lowered you onto the bed and gently tugged your hand away from his jacket. 

                “Keep your chin tilted back chief, it’ll help with air flow,” Havoc said, “I’m going to snag a nurse okay.” 

               “Hurry,” Your voice was tight and strained.  Within minutes, there were several nurses and your doctor in the room.  One tried to place something over your face, you couldn’t tell what it was due to closed eyes, but it made you panic and you fought to keep it away.  The pain in your chest became more acute and you let out an involuntary yelp.

                “Chief, calm down for a second, they’re trying to help.” 

                “…Havoc…” you groaned feeling nervous with so many unfamiliar faces around you when you cracked your eyes open.  God you hated hospitals. 

                “Right here chief,” the Lieutenant made his way into your vision and he took the mask from the nurse, “Here let me put this on.”

                “What is it?”

                “It’ll help you breathe,” was all Havoc said.  Through your watery vision you noticed the staff was waiting with baited breath as Havoc lowered it toward your mouth and nose.  You allowed him to fix the strap around the back of your head and all staff released a breath of tension.  Something was being pushed into your IV line and you weren’t sure how you felt about that.  A minute later you decided you didn’t care what it was because the pain was starting to go away and breathing _was_ becoming easier. 

                “Are you starting to feel better Mr. Elric?”  Your gaze drifts over to the doctor who is dismissing the nurses.

                “Yeah.” 

                “Calm?”

                “…Yeah.” You were surprised at this change, before everything seemed like it was _too_ much now there was pleasantly nothing bothering you.

                “Good,” the doctor commented then held a hand up to Havoc when he tried to speak, “let’s let Mr. Elric ask his questions.”  You did have questions but you were having a hard time grasping the words you wanted to use.

                “…W-…”  You weren’t sure what you wanted to say.

                “Is he okay?”  Havoc asked softly.

                “It’s the drug we administered, it slows cognitive thought processes.  It’ll take him a moment before he figures out what he wants to say.”  Havoc nodded and left you to it. 

                “What…was that?”  You asked. 

                “I believe that was a reaction to far too much stress that led to an attack.  You were having chest pains correct?”  You blinked and for a few moments you just breathed.

                “Mmm….yeah…I was…”

               “This along with the problems of keeping food down or even your lack of appetite could be due to anxiety or stress.  I believe your large amount of stress is causing the anxiety,” he pressed something on your wrist and he looked at his watch, “I would even say that you are probably feeling very calm and if I’m not mistaken hungry.”  You blinked very lethargically and tried to think.  Your body was pretty light and you didn’t feel pained anywhere.  Although you did feel a slight tug in your stomach.

                “… Yeah…I’m hungry…”   you answered after a moment. 

                “And you can eat as soon as the worst of the drug wears off, wouldn’t want you to choke on breakfast.”   You were silent for a few moments.

                “yeah…breakfast,”

                “All in due time Mr. Elric.” 

                “Like…fucking pancakes sound awesome.”  Havoc tried to hide a smirk.

                “Yeah? “ He asked. 

                “….”

                “Chief?”

                “….With like…fucking….chocolate chips in it!”

                “…”

                “…and like a whole gallon of syrup!”  You tried to gesture with your hands but they mainly flopped in the air, “with some damn orange juice.  None of that cow juice. No, no!  Just some orange juice!  And maybe a banana…yeah…and, and that yellow square…”

                “Yellow square?”

                “Yeah, it’s like…fruit.”

                “Ah would you perhaps mean the pineapple you had for dinner last night?”  The doctor asked you with an amused smile.

                “Yes!  That shit on the side would be fan-fucking-tastic.” 

                “I’ll see what I can do there chief,”

                “Only if you share Aniki!”  Chiyo piped up from the other side of the room her voice coated in amusement.

                “Fine…but first, I wanna nap!”  You slurred before closing your eyes and losing touch with the three people in the room.

**WOW I’m SO SORRY for this WAYY Late update!  I’m just going through some problems with motivation and whatnot.  I’m also trying to finish up all of my work for the school year and prepare for my tests!  I’m feeling pretty stressed so my updates and all of you guys had to suffer for that!  I wish I could say I feel better now that I’ve updated but Keeping Him Close fans haven’t seen an update since JANUARY!!!!!!! Well hopefully I can crank out that chapter do school work and crank out another PT chapter!  Hope you guys are still enjoying!**


	11. North City

**North City**

 

This Chapter is dedicated to SQUEE-BUNNY!

I thank you for your support that you gave before this story was ever posted and I thank you for asking me to post it once more (after I had deleted the original at least).  Some of the scenes in this are the ones you requested and I hope they turned out like you hoped they would!  Thanks again for the support!

I would like to ask that you guys follow me on tumblr and like me on Facebook!  Both of those sites are on my profile but I’m going to put there here as well.

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Thanks for the support and I hope you enjoy!

 

            For the first time in what feels like years you are able to wake up on your own instead of by the forceful hand of some second party.  The room is warm and the only light coming through is the small amount of sun that managed to sneak around the heavy blinds.  Chiyo is still sleeping on the other side of the room and you try to be as quiet as possible while you get up and go to the bathroom so you don’t wake her.  Your body is unnaturally heavy as you try to maneuver yourself into the bathroom.  You are feeling so relaxed that you are forced to sit while you do your business.  You study the IV line that you managed to drag along with you but you don’t recognize the name of the medication any more than the first eighty times you looked at it.  You know that it’s a type of relaxant but in the two weeks that you had been on it and stuck in the hospital you couldn’t figure out what made it tick.  You drag your heavy feet back to your bed and settle down. 

            You look off to your left and notice that a tray has been left there for you.  With a sigh you lift the lid and, like the first time you saw food while on the relaxant, it looked appealing. Perhaps stress could affect you to the point of harming your body.  You didn’t think that such a thing had been possible but clearly, as you were able to eat everything without feeling nauseous for two weeks, it was entirely possible.  You were feeling content as you laid back down to rest for a few more minutes. Just as you settled down enough to start drifting there was a light knock on the door and it opened.  You opened an annoyed eye as Mustang walked in.

            “What?” You snapped.

            “Feeling a little grumpy are we?” Mustang teased.  You frowned and sat up a little.

            “I was just fine until you barged in here.  What do you want?”

            “To talk,” Mustang said as he sat down next to your bed.  You noticed a slight shift from Chiyo who lifted her head a little.  Your eyes darted over and Mustang must have noticed, “No need to pretend you’re sleeping Chiyo, you can hear this.” She sat up this time.

            “Is Aniki in trouble?”

            “Not at all,” Mustang offered a smile over his shoulder, “Unless he’s done something in the past twelve hours that I should know about?”  Chiyo instantly shook her head.

            “Nope nothing!” she said instantly making you sigh and Mustang suspicious. 

            “We’ll talk later,” he told you before starting what he had originally come in for, “First of all, Chiyo you’ll be released tomorrow and you’re free to stay with my first lieutenant if that makes you comfortable.”

            “Wait,” you interrupted, “I thought you said she could stay with us?”

            “Think about it aniki, he’s a man not a boy but a _man,_ and I’m just a kid and a girl at that.  If I stayed there it would be weird especially if you weren’t there to vouch.  Besides, I don’t mind staying with the first lieutenant!  We have a lot in common and maybe she’ll teach me how to shoot a gun!”  Chiyo completed the speech with the action of shooting an invisible gun.  The more you thought about it the more it made sense; Chiyo staying with Mustang _would_ look weird. 

            “Yeah alright, so you’ll be staying with Hawkeye…what about me?”

            “They want to keep you for another day at the least.”

            “At the least?!  Why? I gained the weight and I’m not having attacks anymore!  I don’t want to stay here!”  You complained.  It was all so unfair!  Why did Chiyo get to go home? Just because she wasn’t jittery anymore and could walk again?  Why couldn’t you go too?

            “Calm down,” Mustang said even though your voice was the only thing that had risen.  The rest of your body was too relaxed, “You’ve been having positive progress because of the medication you’re on Edward.  They just want to make sure that once they take you off of it, you’ll stay on the same track.  So I wanted to ask you what you wanted to have so you could keep your mind off of things.  I figured if you had something to set your mind on then you could relax more and not have the anxiety attacks.”

            “I want to find Al,” you said firmly.  Mustang shook his head looking as if he had expected this from you.  

            “I don’t want to give you anything that will stress you out further.  You trust me don’t you?”

            “That’s not the-,” You started but were cut off.

            “Don’t you?”  It was a tone that demanded a truthful answer.

            “…Yes,” you grumbled knowing Mustang was about two seconds away from winning the argument.

            “Then _trust me_ when I say that I’m searching for Alphonse and I will let you know when I find him.  Leave it to me and you concentrate on gaining strength for the battles to come.”

            “Right,” you sigh. 

            “You could always bring him Alchemy books.  He just shuts out the world when he reads them,” Chiyo shifted on her bed and rested her chin on folded arms.  You glared at her.  Damn her for telling him your weakness!

            “Don’t know why I didn’t think of it in the first place,” Mustang smirked.  You glared.  That bastard, he already _knew_ that you couldn’t pull yourself from a good book.  You were so careful about it too!  You wouldn’t read when the colonel was around or when he was supposed to be meeting with you! 

            “Che,” you sighed with a glare to the side.

            “Don’t tell me, you’re upset about getting books?”  Mustang raised an eyebrow and you glared at him, “Or are you upset about me already knowing your little weakness?”  You bristled, a little upset that Mustang could see through you so easily and you couldn’t read anything other than the fake appearance he put out.  It had even taken you several years to notice that the outward personality of the colonel was just a cover up and it irritated you to no ends that he was able to read you over the _phone_. 

            “Whatever, I’ll take the damn books,” you mumbled.  Mustang laughed and your eyes slid to the side in a glare. 

            “They’ll take you off that medication in a few minutes so that’s one thing to be happy about, no more needles,” Mustang commented.  _That_ brightened your spirits greatly.  You couldn’t stop the large grin that filled your face and made your cheeks puff out from coming. 

            “When?”  You asked eager to be free from the uncomfortable needle.  There was a knock on the door and Mustang shrugged.

            “Now I suppose,” he answered as your normal nurse entered the room.  You automatically held your arm out and she chuckled.

            “Well now, I can’t say I’m surprised that you were told but I am surprised that you haven’t attempted to remove it yourself,” she grinned while expertly removing the line and bandaging up the little pin prick it left on your arm.

            “Yeah well if you were any later it woulda been out as soon as he left!”  You claimed while pointing to Mustang.

            “I wouldn’t let something like that happen ma’am,” Mustang said smoothly winning over her approval.  But she was not as so kind as to leave it at that.

            “I would like to believe you on that but I know for a fact that you’ve given both of these children far too much lenience, Mr. Mustang,” She chided.  Mustang grinned coyly and bowed his head slightly.

            “And for that I apologize.”

            “I wish that you meant it Mr. Mustang,” she countered, “Now, Mr. Elric, you may feel symptoms of withdrawal from this medication from being on it for so long.  Nothing too serious, maybe some hot flashes and irritability but other than that you should be okay.  If anything feels strange let someone know, do you understand?”

            “Yep I got it!”

            “How will we be able to tell the difference in your normally irritability there, Shorty?” Mustang teased his voice heavy with sarcasm. 

            “WHO ARE YOU CALLIN’ SO SHORT THAT HE COULD TRIP OVER AN ANT?” You screamed anger boiling over your limits.  You would punch the bastard out! Mustang started laughing and you crossed your arms in front of your chest.  Damn him for being able to get a rise out of you so easily “Shut up Chiyo!” You snapped at the laughing girl. 

            “You see my dilemma here?” Mustang addressed your nurse, “How will we _ever_ tell?”

            “Well I’m sure if you don’t goad Mr. Elric into a response you should be able to tell just fine,” She said with a sly grin.  You glared at them all.  Screw them. 

\------------------------ ---

            Finally and without further complications you were released from the hospital a day and a half later.  Mustang was taking you back hom-to his house.  There was a box of books in the backseat that had been taken down from Mustang’s own shelves and you were tempted to reach back and grab one.  It really felt like such a _long_ trip.  You nearly cried tears of relief when you saw the familiar streets and houses.  You resisted the incredible, and slightly ridiculous, urge to skip to the front door.  It was nice to be able to breathe out of that damn room and to be somewhere comfortable! 

            “Don’t get too comfortable,” Mustang warned as you rolled onto the floor stopping only when your back hit the couch, “we’re leaving to a meeting after we eat.” 

            “Che, why do _I_ have to go?”  You were hoping to find some sort of information on your father while Mustang was out.

            “You’re part of the team too.”

            “I’ve never had to go before,” you were extremely close to whining.

            “You were never in town before.  Now that we have you, you’re going.” 

            “I could just _leave_ town again,” you suggested.  Mustang gave you a dry glare and you shrugged then accepted your fate to a boring evening.  Mustang was searching for something in the kitchen while you carefully stacked the boxes of books back on the shelves they came from.  You tried to keep your cheeks from turning red when the top two shelves ended up being too high for you to reach but you could tell from the heat that you had failed.  This was usually the point where Al would make up some excuse about you not eating that day and order you to go get food and he would handle the books.  Dejected, you rested your forehead against one of the shelves and clenched your fists.  You _had_ to find him soon; otherwise you weren’t sure you could deal with the consequences. 

            “Dinner’s up, kid,” Mustang called from the kitchen.

            “I’m not a damn kid,” you grumbled.  You shuffled into the kitchen angrily and stabbed your baked potato with excessive force.  After mutilating said potato you added a touch of salt and proceeded to eat it like that.  Mustang shook his head but didn’t say anything as he pushed a glass of juice towards you.  You brightened up at the site of the amber liquid.  You weren’t able to have apple juice in the hospital!  Halfway through the glass you realized it was Mustangs way of apologizing for the quick jabs and the meeting that night.  You wiped your mouth with your sleeve, earning a look of disapproval and a napkin pressed into your hand. 

            “Thanks,” you said while avoiding eye contact, “for everything…” you clarified then took an overly large bite of potato so that you wouldn’t have to say anything more.  Mustang nodded his acceptance and then crossed his left arm across his chest and leaned it on the countertop. 

            “What are you thinking?”  You paused mid-chew.  You tried to ask him to clarify but you ended up spewing potato from your mouth, “Chew and swallow first.”  Mustang rolled his eyes and you glared before swallowing the massive load of starch. 

            “What do you mean?”  You asked then drank more juice. 

            “What exactly are you planning to do after you get Alphonse back?”  Mustang asked with a serious look in his eye.  You paused; it wasn’t exactly something that you had thought about.  You were concentrating so hard on finding your brother that you hadn’t thought about what you would do when you found him.  What would you do?  Probably, maybe…bring him here?  You glanced at Mustang.  It was _his_ house not your official place to crash after everything was worked out.  Perhaps you would go back to Risembool?  After all your goals had been met and that’s all you really wanted, wasn’t it? 

            Then there was the matter of the homunculi, you knew it was going to happen someday but you knew that you had to clean up your mess.  Even if it meant, striking down the image of your own mother.  Then there was Bradley, you didn’t like letting a homunculi of all things run the country you lived in.  They had to be planning something horrendous and you had a sinking feeling that it would get several innocent civilians involved. You felt no comfort in leaving that for Colonel Useless to clean up.

            “I don’t know,” you finally answered your fork lax in your grip, “We’ve got messes to clean up here and…I don’t think we can ever _truly_ feel comfortable back in Risembool for the rest of our lives…well…” you swallowed thickly, “at least, _I_ won’t…” 

            “Why is that?” 

            “We don’t have anywhere that we could call home there.” 

            “I thought you had Winry,” Mustang countered. 

            “Winry is great and all but…that’s _her_ home.  I-she…I grew up with her, we are family but…it’s just weird.  I mean…Al…he…” Your cheeks went red.  It was no secret to you that Al had a crush on Winry since he was eight; it didn’t seem to die down at all.  In fact it seemed to grow stronger each time Al got to see her. 

            “I see,” Mustang nodded his understanding of the situation.  You sighed relieved that you didn’t have to say it and completely betray your brother’s trust, “and what of Chiyo?”

            “…I dunno.  I mean she obviously didn’t return right away when she could.  She’s probably got something she’s not telling me.  It’s not that surprising really but she’s moved on to bigger things.  I think she only returned to help us but that’s only something I can guess at.  I don’t remember when or why she showed up.  I just have a feeling that it was an out of the blue kind of thing.” 

            “Hmmm.”

            “I guess we’ll just tackle everything in front of us and decide when the time comes…”  You mumble. Mustang chuckles and you fail to see what the humor in this situation is.

            “That’s just like you Edward, do you ever make plans?”  You frowned, nearly pouting, and glared.

            “Yes!”  This seemed to make Mustang laugh harder.  Apparently it was something unbelievable, “It’s just easier to act first!” 

            “I’m sure it is!”  Mustang chortled. 

            “Shut up,” you grunted. 

            “Sorry, sorry,” Mustang snickers, “Finish your food and we can go.”  You stab the remains of the potato ruthlessly and chomp hard on it.  You shove your plate at Mustang, who seems to still be laughing at you in his head.  He takes both your plate and his then rinses them in the sink.  

            “I’ll be in the fucking car,” you grumble.

            “Grab a jacket!  It’s supposed to get cold tonight, winters around the corner.” 

            “Yeah, yeah.”  You dismissed.  You grab a black jacket from your room anyway.  You get in the passenger seat in the car and prop your feet up on the dash.  Mustang’s question struck you a deeper than you’d like to admit.  With the way that things were looking it almost seemed as if your life was going to fall apart.  You were uncomfortable in Risembool when you were there for long periods of time.  It had just been too long since you were able to sit in the quiet and relax.  In central even everyday life was loud.  Between the people, cars, and military it just seemed natural to bustle along at a quick pace.  You weren’t sure that staying in Risembool would be something that you would essentially be happy with. 

            Alphonse on the other hand _loved_ Winry that much you knew.  He wouldn’t want to stay in Central once you were out of the military and they were free.  He craved the peace and quiet where as for you it made you itchy and paranoid.  It didn’t look like you would be able to stay together.  You wished that you were only imagining the pain in your heart because it _hurt_.  You pressed your forehead to your raised knees wishing the answers would just pop out in front of your face.

            “Put your feet down,” Mustang commanded as he entered the car, “and put your damn seat belt on.” 

            Of course answers never did appear when you wanted them to.  You sighed and complied with the orders.  You pressed your chin into the palm of your hand and watched the scenery pass out the window.  It was dark but not so much to conceal the landscape.  After watching the fourth mailbox pass you decided to get some information on what exactly you were being subjected to. 

            “What’s this meeting about?” 

            “Team evaluation and miscellaneous.” 

            “What’s Miscellaneous?”

            “Miscellaneous: various types or-,”

            “Don’t be an ass!  You sound like Falman holy crap.  You know what I mean, just answer the damn question.”  You crossed your arms angrily when Mustang smirked. 

            “Anything the team wants to bring up.” 

            “Oh.”  Mustang managed to get to the office in just under 8 minutes and you could have sworn he was wearing a smug grin at the time he had managed to get.  You decided to bring him down a notch.

            “Don’t be too proud of that time, you were driving with almost no one on the road _and_ you nearly ran two stop signs.” 

            “At least I can drive,” Mustang commented.  You glared; it wasn’t your fault that you didn’t have the time to learn. 

            “Whatever,” you growled unable to come up with something witty, “Bastard.” 

            “Shrimp.”

            “I’M NOT SHORT YOU ASSHOLE!” 

            “Whatever you need to tell yourself there Shorty,” Mustang teased.

            “WHO ARE YOU CALLING SO TINY THAT HE WOULD FALL IN THE CRACK OF A SIDEWALK?!”  You screamed anger boiling over into rants.  

            “I don’t recall saying any of that.”  The urge to punch the smirk off his face was overwhelming.  Just before you actually did it, you caught sight of Hawkeye and Black Hayate waiting by the entrance of HQ.  All anger drained away at the sight of her trusty gun clipped on her hip.  You noticed that the smirk on the colonel’s face had also disappeared. 

            “A quick word sir?”  She requested.  You could tell that Mustang was surprised by her abruptness.

            “Wait here Ed.”

            “Yeah okay I’ll just wait here by this rusty gate and security guard that couldn’t give a shit about anything while you two have a grand ol’ time,” you groaned.  The security guard bristled and stood straighter while you received a look from Mustang. 

            “Just wait here.” 

            “Yeah, Yeah.”  You leaned against said rusty gate and watched them slip into the car.  You moved slightly to the side and watched Hawkeye’s lips closely.  Luckily she only thought that you were glaring at them, not reading her lips. 

            _“We may have found Hohenheim and Alphonse.”_   Your stomach tightened as she handed over a folded piece of paper to the colonel.  You tried to keep your face neutral but you knew it was far paler than it should have been. 

            _“We got a call about twenty minutes ago about a man with Hohenheim’s description…he was with a young boy.  They spotted him in North City and it looked like they were getting a place to stay for a while.”_  She paused while Mustang said something to her.

_“I haven’t reported this to anyone other than you just in case we do have a leak.  I don’t want this getting to Bradley if he truly is a Homunculus anymore than you do.”_  Mustang was talking again but with his back to you, you had no idea what he was saying. 

_“Yes, sir…and…what of Edward?”_ Her eyes flickered over to you and you did your best to put on a put out face.  You had no idea what Mustang said but Hawkeye nodded and watched as Mustang burned the piece of paper she had given him.  They exited the car and Mustang barely glanced at you before he showed his pocket watch to the guard and strolled through.  Anger rolled through your body and you quickly flashed your pocket watch before following after him with the first lieutenant showed her ID.  Mustang didn’t plan on saying a damn thing to you and it was _your_ brother damn it! 

            The meeting was slow after that and you hardly paid attention to it, even when you were asked questions you merely crossed your arms and ignored them or gave a neutral grunt.  There were many concerned glances between them but Mustang only looked annoyed.  You knew it was only a matter of time before you both exploded on each other.  Soon enough you were stomping out of the room and angrily making your way to the car.  Mustang didn’t even bring up Al in the meeting!  You didn’t say a word on the way back and you could _feel_ the tension in the air.  It blew as soon as you both were in the house.

            “What the _hell_ was that?” Mustang bit out, “there was no need for that attitude!  One or two jabs at your height shouldn’t put you in that foul of a mood for a whole night!  What the _hell is your problem_?” 

            “Were you even planning on telling me?!”  You yelled, whirling around to yell at the colonel. 

            “Tell you _what_ Ed?”

            “About my _brother_!”  Mustangs suddenly pale face told you everything you needed to know, “I didn’t think so.”  You said coldly.

            “Wait a minute, how did you even know?”

            “I can read lips dipshit!”  Mustang quietly cursed to himself.

            “What the hell does private even mean to you?!”

            “It’s _my_ brother!  I deserve to know!”

            “Did you ever stop and think that maybe I wanted to make some sort of plan before putting more stress on your shoulders?!” 

            “ _I_ should be included in those plans!  He’s NOT your family! _You_ aren’t the one who takes care of him!” 

            “And you are?  You take care of him by dragging him across the country and into Drachma putting both of your lives at danger?  That’s how you take care of your little brother?” 

            “No! I’m going to go get him!  Tonight!  I’m going to North City!”

            “Like _hell_ you are!” You couldn’t take it anymore. You lunged at the colonel.  It seemed the man was at his limits as well because the next thing you knew, you were over his knee and getting the shit beaten out of your rear. 

            “W-What the hell!”  It freaked you out more than anything.  You hadn’t received a spanking since you were living with granny and only then because you had nearly pushed Al into the river due to carelessness. 

            “Stop just diving into things and use. Your. Head.” Mustang was merciless timing his hits with the emphasis he wanted on his words. 

            “Ouch!  Stop!  S-Stop!”  You were humiliated by this unexpected course of action that Mustang took.  The worst part was that it was starting to have an effect.  The fight was driven out of you and the upper half of your body sagged over his knee while you were tugging occasionally at his pant leg.  Stubborn tears leaked out of the corners of your eyes, mostly from anger but you could feel the worry for Al building up.  Your head spun when you were suddenly stood upright and turned to face the colonel.  He looked absolutely terrifying with dark eyes and a grim expression. 

            “I’m not going to apologize and I’m not going to bring it up but I am going to tell you that you need to get a lid on your temper.  You need to start using that brain of yours because, despite your boneheaded actions, I know you have a brain in there somewhere.  I’m not going to take anymore of this in the moment bullshit Edward.  You are under my watch until _I_ say so.  I don’t care if your health has improved or if you think you can take care of yourself.  You are still under my jurisdiction as my _ward_ until I release you.  Do you understand?”  You nodded while stubbornly trying to keep the tears shoved firmly in your eyes.  Mustang sighed and released the grip he had on your shoulders. 

            “I still want to go get him,” you said stubbornly.  Mustang pinched the skin between his eyes.

            “And I figured that you would, which is why I didn’t want to say anything until I had formulated a plan.”

            “You mean that we’ll actually go?”  Mustang landed his piercing stare on your again and you met it. 

            “Eventually yes I intended to go to North City.” 

            “Oh…”  You resisted the urge to squirm as the pain started to fade and the itch began to settle.  Mustang slowly reached a hand over and swiped a coarse thumb over your cheeks, taking the tears with it.  Your cheeks colored, embarrassed that he was seeing you cry.  You turned your head away and scrubbed at your face with your sleeves.  The feeling was rough on your already hot face and it left you feeling a little irritated. 

            “Come on,” Mustang sighed as he stood and pushed a hand between your shoulder blades.

            “Where are we going?”  You asked as Mustang pushed you out of the living room.

            “I don’t trust that you’ll stay here tonight and I have no desire to sit up all night and make sure you stay put.  So you’re changing into your pajamas and we’re both sleeping in my room tonight.” 

            “…Oh…” you replied meekly. 

\-----------------------

            You were having an incredibly hard time getting comfortable due to the burn in your rear.  The bed was large enough that you could be a comfortable enough distance away from the colonel, who was sleeping with his back to you, but small enough that he was able to feel every fidget and movement.  You were also tugging on the blankets occasionally as you were getting colder as the night dragged on.  So naturally the colonel became too annoyed to withstand it.

            “Go to sleep!” He snapped. 

            “I _can’t_ ,” you nearly whined, “It hurts.” You added much more meekly. 

            “Then sleep on your stomach!”  Grumbling, you turned over and laid on your stomach.  The burning itch prickled and began to dissipate and you sighed contently.  The cold was still bothering you but you didn’t dare risk pulling the blankets over your head.  The colonel was already irritated enough by your fidgeting.  You pulled a stray hair out of your face and sunk into your pillow.  When you closed your eyes, unease clouded your mind.

            What if Alphonse was suffering horribly by your father’s hand?  The first lieutenant didn’t say anything about the condition of either of them.  The thought of Alphonse in pain made your stomach sink a little bit.  Unintentionally your thumbs started to twiddle in front of your face.  You should be there to support him while Al was struggling to figure out his body again.  It really had been so long since he had one, no correction, had been in his body.  He had always had it; it was just a little hard to get to.  What if he had a hard time walking?  Or eating or moving around in general.  You felt terrible to know that you weren’t there to help him.

 A sigh escaped your lips and you turned your head to the side.  The urge to leave was there but not strong or persuasive.  You had only said that you were leaving out of pure frustration and anger with the colonel.  Perhaps he was right, you did tend to jump into things without thinking but usually they worked out.  Mostly because you had Alphonse to back you up, but they still worked out.  Sitting around and waiting wasn’t in your forte.  It was foreign and it felt strange to know where to go but to _not_ go.  Your whole life had been you going wherever you thought there was a lead.  You didn’t wait, you didn’t plan you just hopped on the next train with your suitcase and brother.  That had been the method for so many years it seemed natural.  Now you just weren’t sure what to do with anything. 

“Edward, go. To. Sleep.”  The colonel was getting irritated again. 

            “Sorry,” you mumbled shoving your hands under your pillow so they wouldn’t act on their own again.  Silence fell over the room until you turned on your side towards the colonel, “Mustang…”  He must have sensed something hesitant in your tone because he sighed and turned around, facing you.

            “What?”

            “…Do you think that Al’s okay?”  You must have looked as worried as you felt because the colonel did something completely strange.  He scooted closer and wrapped an arm around you bringing you close to his chest.  He smelled like campfire and whiskey. 

            “Yeah.  I think he’s a fighter.  He’s probably the one ordering your dad to go out long enough to be noticed by someone.”

            “…Do you think that means he wants me to find him?” Your words were muffled by Mustang’s shirt but still understood. 

            “I don’t know, but either way, we’ll get to him.” 

            “I hope so…”

            “If I know any part of you at all, I know you’ll tear apart every corner of North city to find him.”  You smirked a little.  It sounded pretty accurate.

            “Yeah…I’m not leaving without him this time.”

            “I know.”  The colonel answered.  The room fell silent again and you hesitantly snuggled closer to the colonel.  He was warm and didn’t deny the contact.  Just for this night, you would indulge and feel like maybe; just maybe you were wanted here by someone. 

**0.o I’m SO SORRY for this uber late update!  I thought I would have more time to write now that it’s summer vacation, and I was right!  What I didn’t expect was the sudden lack of inspiration!  I would literally open this story up and stare at the pages for hours.  I just didn’t know what to write!  Finally it came to me and I know have this chapter up!  I’ll work hard to get the next one up but I’m going to try and update Keeping Him Close first.**

**ALSO you can find out status on stories by checking out my facebook page at facebook (dot) com / Koibitotedare!  Please look for me on tumblr at Koibitotedare (Dot) Tumblr (Dot) com  I hope to get some more follows and likes!  Don’t be afraid to post comments or opinions or thoughts! < 3 you all! **

**Koibito~**


	12. Reunion

# Dedication to SQUEE-BUNNY!

## The second scene you requested is in here as well!

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Without further Ado…Chapter 12

### Reunion

It had been an agonizing three days before Mustang had gotten his shit together and a vehicle to borrow.  Your leg was bouncing to an unknown rhythm as the van was loaded up.  Chiyo sat across from you looking slightly green; she tried to offer a smile for comfort but she looked like she was about to be sick.  Mustang reached up from the ground and hauled himself into the vehicle.  He put a hand on your knee, stilling the limb and causing silence to fall oppressively on your ears.

                “When are we leaving?”  You asked. 

                “Soon,” Mustang answered for the umpteenth time.  You looked at your pocket watch.

                “You said that fourteen minutes and twenty-five seconds ago…”  You protested.  Mustang sighed and you could tell he was resisting the urge to run a hand through his hair, “Why are we in an ice cream truck?  It feels like we’re going to scam some kids.” 

                “We aren’t scamming kids,” Mustang sighed, “I told you we have to make this look civilian and real.  We _are_ going to be selling ice cream.”  You groaned and let your head thunk back onto the side of the truck. 

                “But-,”

               “Don’t complain,” Mustang ordered, “You want to come then you play by my rules.  This is the safest place.  Falman, Breda, and Fuery are driving behind us; everyone else is here so behave, got it?”  

                “Yes, sir,” you grumbled giving a lazy salute.  Mustang sighs again and spares a glance for Chiyo before hopping back down to help with preparations.  You notice that as he talks to Hawkeye he moves in closely to her and whispers in her ear.  There are times when she laughs and times when she blushes.  Not once does she move in to take her weapon.  You turn your head, curious as she places her hand on his hip.  You blinked and for a moment it looked as if Mustang had kissed her cheek, but you could be wrong.

                “Aren’t you nervous?”  Chiyo asked.

                “Why should I be?”  You ask, “I just want to find Al.” 

                “…Right…just finding Al.”  Her face paled.  You stopped yourself from asking her if she was okay when you suddenly remembered,

                “Wait, didn’t you say the gate told you that Hohenheim would bring Al to us?”

                “Did I?” She asked looking nervous.

                “Yes,” you pursued, “You said it when you first woke up…it was just me and Mustang in the room.”

              “I think you’re remembering a bad dream, Aniki,” She avoided eye contact, “it was probably the influence of drugs.”  You glared at her, suspicious.

                “Chiyo…” You dragged her name out in a warning tone.  She glanced nervously at the bustling soldiers before hopping over to sit next to you.

                “It’s like I said, things are complicated and I have to be careful with what I say,” she said quickly, the words flowing nonstop from her mouth, “I was told of two possible futures and I was honestly hoping it was the one where Hohenheim brings niisan home…Things are going to get tough…that’s all I can say Aniki.  Just…be prepared.” 

                “For what?”  You asked, your heart beating quickly.

                “…Everything…” 

                “If you know something is going to happen then can’t you do something to stop it?!” you whispered angrily.  She shook her head.

                “There are too many possible outcomes…”  She avoided eye contact with you, “Just…harden yourself…”  With that she slid to her original spot and brought her knees to her chest.  Your leg started bouncing again.  What could she possibly be talking about?  Was it Al?  Your stomach sank into your legs, what if it _was_ Al? 

                “Edward, sit down.”  When did you stand up?  You looked at Mustang and looked down at the seat you had been previously occupying. 

                “I just, I need to pee,” you said absentmindedly.  Mustang raised an eyebrow and you jolted.

                “You _just_ went,” the man said somewhat suspiciously, “sit down.”  You sank down into the seat, your leg thumping away.  Mustang said something to Havoc and the man nodded and climbed in the truck; he sat next to you.

                “Nervous chief?”  You glanced at him.

                “No,” you answered, holding eye contact with Chiyo, “excited.”  She bit her lip and avoided eye contact with Havoc when the man looked over.

                “Excited?”

                “I get to find my brother and give my no good _father_ a punch in face,” you answered, your fists clenched by your sides.  The man hummed thoughtfully and he shifted before crossing his right ankle over his left knee. 

                “You seem pretty anxious though,” he gave you a side glance; “maybe I should grab you something?” 

                “I don’t need anything, I’m fine,” You ground out through clenched teeth because damn it you _were_ fine!  You weren’t relapsing like people thought you might be.  You crossed your arms and let out a huff of air, “I just want to get _moving_.”  Havoc didn’t look convinced but he didn’t continue trying to ‘get something’ for you.  Finally, things started to get going.  Mustang crawled into the truck and sat on the other side of you, sandwiching you between the two men while Chiyo had plenty of room with only Hawkeye to keep her company.   Thankfully Havoc moved after a moment to close them in and move up to the front part of the truck.  You mentally mapped out the truck again, there was the front cabin where Havoc would be driving, then the center where the ice cream was and then the small compartment in the back where the four of you were hidden.  It was cramped and warm but it was going to get you to your brother.  The truck rattled and rumbled to life and Mustang handed two yellow squishy things.

                “Ear plugs,” he said simply.  You frowned, it was that loud.  Chiyo put hers in without complaint or question.  You nearly pocketed the plugs, until the damn music started.

                “What the hell?”  You questioned.

                “It’s just until we get out of Central,” Mustang answered, “We’ll take back roads after that.”  With a grumble you shoved the things in your ears.  The ride was bumpy and annoying as fuck but you crossed your arms and pretended like it was just another train.  Unfortunately this made you tired, like riding trains normally did, so you tried to ignore it and think of something else.  You huffed when the irritating sleepy feeling wouldn’t disappear from your eyes.  You wiggled in your seat trying to make yourself uncomfortable.  Sleeping wasn’t an option, not until you had Alphonse and were heading back home.  Your leg started to bounce again.

                “Edward,” the warning came from Hawkeye.  You stilled your leg instantly.  Mustang and Hawkeye shared a look and you glared slightly. 

                “The ride is a long one,” Mustang said.  His voice, like Hawkeyes had been, was slightly muffled form the ear plugs but still audible.  It had only been ten minutes; there was no way you were going to give into sleep right away! 

                “…What if we can’t find him?” You ask after a moment of silence.  Mustang looks a little shocked; he had probably expected you to argue. 

                “Then we keep searching,” Mustang said simply.  You looked at the ground, the answer was easy to understand.  Just keep looking, keep going but what you spent the rest of your life looking and still never found him?  Or if you did, what if it had been too late and the homunculi had already gotten them.  The truck stopped and you heard the shouts of kids and laughter.  A sigh left your lips and you slouched in your seat again.  The third time the truck stopped you shifted irritated.  How much time were you wasting by doing this?  You crossed your left ankle over your right knee. 

                “This is ridiculous!” you yelled the fourth time the truck stopped.

                “Shh!” Mustang reprimanded quickly, “We can’t be heard Edward.” 

                “Yeah, whatever,” You grumbled.

                “If you’re going to be this irritable then just go to sleep,” Mustang said in a hushed tone.  He apparently wasn’t giving you a choice because he wrapped a hand around your head and dragged you down so your ear was resting on the seat that Havoc had been occupying.  The truck started up again and after a moment Havoc called back.

                “Keep it down back there next time we stop will ya!  I had to cover for ya!” 

                “Will do,” Hawkeye said as Mustang wrestled you back down, “Keep up the good work.” 

                “Get off!”  You growled.  You swiped your arm out at Mustang who snagged it out of midair and pinned it to your back.  With just a small amount of pressure from the man you were rendered to just squirms and wiggles on the seats.  You released a frustrated noise and kicked at the colonel who caught the limb in his free hand.         

                “…Should we do something?”  You heard Chiyo ask the first lieutenant. 

                “Normally I would,” She said somewhat hesitantly as you tried to twist around to kick with your other foot and failed, “but I think this is just pent up frustration over the past three days and they need to let it out now before we get to North City.”

                “…Oh.”  You thrashed your body trying to throw the colonel off while ignoring the words you just heard.  So what if it was pent up frustration at the colonel?  He had been down right _insufferable_ for the past few days and he deserved some annoyance! 

                “Enough,” Mustang snapped, “this is ridiculous!  Just go to sleep like you always do on trips!” 

                “Why should I?”  You protested.  Your hair fell in your face, sticking to the sweat that had beaded up there. 

                “Look at yourself!”  Mustang’s voice was tight, as if he were having a hard time keeping it under control, “You’re being intolerable!”  You let out a frustrated yell and tried to push away from him with your available foot, and then fell into a panting mess when you got nowhere.  You clenched the fabric of your sleeve with your one free arm, just trying to breathe and cool down.  When Mustangs grip relaxed you bucked once trying to get away but the grip instantly tightened again. 

                “Let go!” You fought the whine in your voice.  The part of you that wanted to give up was starting to take over bits of the fight you had left. 

                “Are you done?”  Mustang’s voice was strong and unwavering.  You gave a small head nod and Mustang hesitantly released your arm and leg.  You scrambled into a sitting position and hugged your legs, bringing your chin down to rest on your knees.  You took a minute to catch your breath and Mustang sighed, “Ed, just go to sleep.”  He sounded exhausted and strangely worried.  You dug your chin in and set your forehead on your knees, ignoring him.  Hawkeye knocked on the side of the truck and it stopped.

 “Are we there?”  You asked irritated when the stupid ice cream music blared to life. 

                “No,” Mustang answered with a sigh. 

                “Come on Chiyo, let’s go help Jean hand out Ice cream,” She said when the back doors opened to reveal a concerned looking Havoc.  Hawkeye shared another look with Mustang and you hugged yourself tighter. 

                “Really?!”  Chiyo asked excitedly.  She patted your head souring your mood further and hopped out with a hand from Havoc.  Hawkeye shushed Havoc before questions could be asked and she shut the doors leaving just you and Mustang in the back compartment.  You bite your lip trying to keep yourself under control.  You were _so close_ to Al.  You could _feel_ it!  You could have been there already!  If it wasn’t for this damn Ice cream truck and having to be under cover you could have brought him home!  You heard Mustang shift:

“Ed,” his voice was soft.  He put a hand on the back of your neck and you realized that you were shaking. 

                “I could have gotten him home by now…”  You mumbled through numb lips.  Mustang sighed.

                “We’re going to get him now,” Mustangs hand didn’t move from your neck, “better late than never.”  It was strangely comforting to have that warmth there. 

                “I _miss_ him,” You whimpered. 

                “I know,” Mustang said softly.  He moved his hand to wrap around your shaking shoulders.

                “I just don’t feel like I’m doing enough.” 

                “You’re doing what you can,” Mustang countered then tugged just a tad so you were leaning against his ribcage. 

                “What if that’s not enough?”

                “We can ask what-ifs for the rest of our lives and they won’t get us anywhere.  The fact is that you _are_ taking action and doing everything in your power to do what you _are capable_ of doing,” Mustang said.

                “I’m _capable_ of doing more!” you protested.

                “Are you?”  you stopped and actually looked at Mustang for the first time.  You _were_ you could be _there_ and alchemitizing anything that stood in the way of you and your brother.  Mustangs look told you to think again.  In all honestly North City was _huge_ and you had no idea _where_ to start looking.  You would probably be running around looking in random places until you passed out or until you found Al.  If you _did_ find Al, you didn’t know what kind of condition he was in, perhaps he needed medical assistance or was like you and couldn’t walk very long or run or even stay awake for long periods of time.  In that case getting him to the train station and _on_ the train would be a hassle.  You supposed that is what the two vehicles were for.  Then of course all three men in the car following the ice cream truck were information experts.  They were probably solidifying their knowledge of what they knew and didn’t know to make assumptions and best guesses at where to _start_.  It was more than you could do with your limited knowledge.  You hadn’t done enough research before leaving.  Mustang seemed to notice the change in your thoughts because his facial expression softened.

                “I feel useless,” you muttered. 

                “Who is going to get Hohenheim to lower his guard long enough for us to even _see_ Alphonse?” Mustang asked, “I’ll tell you it’s not going to be any of us.  He doesn’t trust the people who have been hunting him down for years but he _will trust_ his son.”

                “…I don’t like him,” you said, “and he knows it.  Maybe trust isn’t the right word.”

                “He trusts in your love for Alphonse, Ed,” Mustang said, “Don’t sell yourself short for being useless.”

                “I said I _feel_ useless,” you clarified, “not that I _am_ useless.  There’s a big difference between you and I.”  Mustang snorted but allowed himself to be called useless.

                “The point is,” Mustang raised his voice slightly, “that there isn’t anything we can do until we get to North City, okay?”  You sighed irritated but it was at least something that you could understand now.

                “Yeah, I got it,” you replied.  Mustang pulled down on your shoulders and you allowed him to lay your head in his lap.  He shrugged his jacket off and laid it over your head.  You sighed and as you brought your hands up to hold the material, you began to wonder when Mustang got to know you well enough to know that the very small amount of light filtering in to the small compartment was going to prevent you from falling asleep.  Regardless you were grateful for the jacket and Mustangs patience.  You knew he wouldn’t mind the soft sound of your breathing for the next few hours instead of that _awful_ ice cream music.  You fell asleep quickly to the thought of Mustang being tormented by the high pitched notes.                                                                                                                                                    

                “Edward,” you stirred at the call of your name but didn’t open your eyes.  You were warm, a little too warm, but comfortable. 

                “Hey kiddo, time to get up!”  Havoc’s voice grated on your ears and the scent of cigarettes invaded your nostrils.  You scrunched your eyes together trying to ignore the calls.  Someone shook your shoulder.

                “Come on Ed, my legs are numb.” The jacket was removed from your face and light hit your eyes.  You groaned and brought your hands up to cover your face, “up.”  It was a command and you sighed but obeyed it.  You rolled into a sitting position and rubbed your eyes with a large yawn. 

                “Are we there?” 

                “Almost,” Havoc answered, “we stopped for food.” 

                “Food?”  you perked up and your stomach instantly voiced it’s complaints at being empty for three hours too long.  There were a few chuckles and you blearily looked out at the group of people outside.  There was an old looking table set with take out food that someone, probably the three that took the car, had picked up.  You dragged yourself out of the warm vehicle and sat down at the slightly chilly table.  The meal was quiet and everyone seemed to be focused on the road ahead instead of the current meal.  You ate quickly hoping that you could get moving faster if you were done eating.  Unfortunately you still had to wait for everyone else to finish as well. 

                As you waited you noticed that the colonel and Hawkeye were sitting next to each other.  You blinked when you noticed that the blonde woman had her hand resting on Mustang’s knee and he was sitting so close to her their shoulders knocked together every time they moved.  You looked around and no one else seemed to notice.  You tried to make eye contact with Chiyo but she was too absorbed in trying some of everything that she was oblivious to the strange things the colonel and first lieutenant were doing.  You looked back and they were sharing another look.  Hawkeye looked amused and her eyes seemed to sparkle in a way that you hadn’t seen before.  It was very strange. 

                It was even more strange when Hawkeye excused herself to find a ladies room and after he finished, Mustang left heading for the truck.  You noticed he only continued on until the other soldiers returned their attention to their meal and the light conversation they were having, before he rerouted and went in the direction that Hawkeye had gone in.  Suspicious you gathered trash and offered to dump it, ignoring the exclamations of surprise you followed after them.  There happened to be a dumpster on the way and you dumped the trash before stealthily continuing.  You found them cuddled up and just talking.  You didn’t risk getting close enough to hear what the conversation was about but when they shared a small kiss you blushed and turned tail.  You ended up bypassing the table and heading straight into the truck where you threw Mustangs discarded jacket over your head to hide your blush.

                “Did he fall asleep again?”  you tensed up when you heard Mustang.  How long had you been laying there? 

                “I don’t think so…” Chiyo said hesitantly, “but just in case he did can we sit up front with lieutenant Havoc?!  It was so much fun!”  You heard several people chuckle.

                “Probably not,” Hawkeye said, “we’re too close now.  We need to go with the original plan.” 

                “Boo,” Chiyo groaned but she scrambled into the back of the truck anyway, “Aniki, get up!  We’re going to be heading out and you _hogging all the space_!”  You pulled the jacket away from your face and glared at her. 

                “It’s not my bubble butt that’s taking up half the space in here,” you teased.  She mocked offence. 

                “Such cruel words!” 

                “Okay,” Mustang said while climbing in, “enough let’s get going shall we?”

                “Yes, sir,” the crew responded.  Hawkeye climbed in and Havoc closed the doors.  It took a few moments but the truck finally started up and they went puttering away.  You avoided eye contact with both Mustang and Hawkeye but as the destination that Breda, Falman, and Fuery had decided on got closer, Mustang started to get serious.              

                “Before we get there, Edward,” you jumped at the sudden sound of a voice, “I want to make absolutely clear that you follow orders.” 

                “Orders?”  You were still avoiding eye contact, unable to look at the man after something so intimate that he had shared with the first lieutenant.  You were forced to look into those dark eyes when your chin was gripped and tugged upward. 

                “Yes, orders,” the man said sternly, “we’ll be breaking into teams.  Havoc is going to be with you and as well as Breda.  They are going to help us communicate with the First Lieutenant, Chiyo, Fuery, and Falman.  If one of us finds Alphonse they’ll send a message the other group and join us.  You will follow _my_ orders and you will not deviate from my side.  Do you understand?”  You jerked your chin away and nodded.

                “Yes, sir.” 

                “Good.”  A few minutes later the rumbling of the engine stopped and Havoc opened the doors to the back.  Mustang ushered you out and you gave a good luck wave to Chiyo before following Mustang through the woods that Havoc had parked in.  You didn’t see the car that was supposedly following but it was probable that they followed at a distance and parked elsewhere to avoid suspicion.  Havoc came in behind and sandwiched you between himself and Mustang.  It was irritating how they continually treated you as a child who needed protection.  As you were lead to the first location you instantly felt wrong.  Everything was wrong, there were so many people and the streets were _full_. 

                “Boss,” Havoc started, “they said it might be about three minutes south.” 

                “No.” you said looking at all the tall buildings and feeling that was _wrong_ too.

                “Edward,” Mustang was warning you.

                “Just, just listen,” you started while leaning against a tree to appear casual and to not draw any attention to them, “Hohenheim survived so long from _not_ being noticed.  I think we should turn around and get away from all this bustling bullshit.  There’s no way he would set up in a place as people friendly as this one.” 

                “Alphonse might have needed medical attention,” Breda countered and you wondered when exactly he had joined them, “he wouldn’t have been able to get the proper attention out in the middle of nowhere.” 

                “We did it just fine in Risembool,” you protested, “…we almost rarely called for a doctor, HE was always the one to fix injuries and when He left it was Aunty Pinako who we called.  He’s perfectly capable of taking care of Al without a doctor’s help.”  Breda fell quiet, it was clear to you that they didn’t think about this. 

                “What do you think?” Mustang asked Breda when the man hesitated.

                “It sounds…bogus and outrageous at the same time,” the man said finally.

                “If you think about where my house was in Risembool, it was separated from everything.  It was three miles just to get to Granny’s and she was our closest neighbor.  He would be somewhere separated,” you argued.

                “…Alright,” Mustang nodded, “lead us then.”   You nodded gratefully and turned around heading back through the trees and you followed your nose.  He was going to need water and North City had several natural springs.  Hohenheim would use that water to help tend to any wounds or make food.  Finally you caught onto something, just as Havoc was about to complain.  You held a hand up and listened.  There was plenty of wildlife, perfect for food, but more importantly you could hear _running_ water.  There was a river nearby and with it several areas where it dropped off into mini waterfalls.  He was around here. 

                “This way,” you whispered.  They followed cautiously and you were prepared to perform alchemy at any second.  You saw Mustang’s hand clothed in white and knew he was prepared to do the same.  Finally you saw a small bungalow with a smaller wooden structure built next to it.  A storage shed.  They were here, you felt it in your gut.  There was the sound of a yelp.  A very familiar yelp, that brought tears to your eyes and made your heart leap out of your chest.

                “Stay back,” Mustag said just as a quiet call for your brother escaped your lips. 

                “No, I need to go first,” you said pushing you way between the three men, “You said so yourself.  Hohenheim won’t trust you.”  Mustang looked like he was about to protest but he agreed and you carefully approached the house looking out for any traps.  There were several and you pointed the out as you found them.  You made your way to the door and opened it.  There in the middle of a living room was your little brother trying to keep his balance while one foot was caught by your biological father.  A sob escaped your throat gaining the attention of both. 

                “Al!” 

                “Brother!”  Al looked shocked to see you but he wrestled his foot back and clumsily ran to you.  He tackled you to the ground and you hugged him tightly.  For the first time in years you touched your brother’s hair, his skin, his _arms_ , his _shirt_!  You felt heat from him and when you felt his heart racing against your own chest another sob broke out and tears built in your eyes.

                “Al,” you whined, “I’m so glad you’re okay!” 

                “That’s _my_ line!” Al protested tearfully, “Where did you _go_?!”  You were so confused but you couldn’t ask your questions through your sobbing so you settled for gripping your brother tighter and crying. 

                “Who the hell are you?”  You heard your father speak but you didn’t know who exactly he was talking to until Breda was trying to usher the both of you away.

                “Come on,” he grumbled, “It’s dangerous here.” 

                “Roy Mustang,” Mustang answered his fingers at the ready.

                “No wait,” Al struggled to get out of your grip, “wait!  _Dad_!” 

                “Al wait,” Breda protested as he broke from your grip and wobbled to his feet.

                “Dad this is Colonel Mustang!  He’s the one who took care of me and brother!”  You stood next to Al and wiped at your face, “Colonel, this is my dad!” 

                “I’m aware of who he is,” Mustang answered.  Al glanced back and forth between the two confused.

                “But…”

                “Al,” you said gaining your little brothers attention, “Don’t.”  Your heart nearly broke as Al looked at you with confused eyes.

                “You’re going to stay here aren’t you brother?  With dad and me…?”

                “No Al…we need to go back to central.”

                “Why?!  No!  I want to stay here!  Look brother!  Dad is right here!  We just need to find Chiyo and-and,”

                “Chiyo has been with me,” you answered, “After _he_ abandoned us and took you Mustang found us and took us home.”

                “Abandoned?”  Hohenheim spoke up, “You think I abandoned you?  In _Drachma_?”  The man was angry but your anger was far stronger.  Mustang nearly reached a hand out to stop you from moving forward but he resisted.

                “You abandoned me once!  What would stop you from doing it again?!”  You yelled.

                “Enough!” Hohenheim yelled as Breda whispered to Mustang that he had sent the message to Fuery, “You know why I had to do that!  Stop throwing a fit and accept that things have changed!”

                “He didn’t abandon you brother!” Al protested, “Don’t you remember?!  Dad had to take me back to the safe house first because I was so weak.  He was coming back for you guys!  He waited to leave until Chiyo had the circle going and didn’t need him anymore!  Then he left and…and when he came back…you were gone.” 

                “I didn’t just _walk_ out Al!  Chiyo was in a _coma_ and I couldn’t stay awake longer than 20 seconds, not even if my life depended on it!”  You felt betrayed by your own brother, how could he _want_ to stay with Hohenheim?  Didn’t he realize that there were better people in Central?  People who actually cared and even stayed through thick and thin?  People who took care of you when you were sick?   People like…People like Mustang.

                “…Do you not remember the transmutation, Edward?”  You glared at Hohenheim.

                “…I remember bits and pieces,” you ground out.  Suddenly Hohenheim went pale and he moved quickly gathering things.

                “We need to go now,” his voice signified seriousness, “All of you!  Yes even you military dogs, get going, out the back.  This is bad!  You’ve led them straight to me haven’t you?”  Al paled as well and he grabbed your hand and tried to pull you along.   

                “What are you talking about?” you questioned.

                “Hello, pipsqueak,” a familiar voice spoke up and you whipped around.

                “..Envy…” you whimpered.                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                              

**Oh my goodness, I’m such a bad person!  I’m so sorry I left you all for so long!  I just fell out of writing and then got trampled by school!  I promise though!  I’m going to be making more of an effort to keep writing especially since I’ve only got a few more chapters to put out and I think this fic will be wrapped up!  I really hope this move in plot has made up for the lack of updates!!!!!!**

 


	13. Battle Ground

**Remember that one memory from chapter three where they are actually in the transmutation that gave Ed his arm and leg back?  Yeah that finally gets explained here…**

**ALSO EXTREMELY IMPORTANT! COLLIEQUEST I SAID I WOULD WARN YOU SO HERE IT IS! TRIGGER WARNINGS FOR THE END OF THE CHAPTER! [SPOILERS] FATHERLY CHARACTER DEATH!!!!**

**  
** **I also took some...artistic liberties to mix a bit of Brotherhood and a bit of the orginal anime in here.  So if there is some confusion about homunculi then that's it...**

# Chapter 13

 

##### Battle Grounds

 

It felt as if your heart stopped beating in your chest for the few terrifying moments that it took to turn around and see for your own eyes that Envy was standing there, leaning against the door frame.  Then your heart started back up in overdrive, pounding so hard you were sure that Al could hear it.  Al.  You thrust your arm out, against your brother’s chest, and backed up, shielding your brother with your body.  Then Envy was burning and screaming. 

            “Go, GO!”  Mustang was shouting but it sounded like he was talking through a tube, the blood rushing through your ears was distracting.  Your shoulder was grabbed and you were being dragged backwards and Envy was standing up again then being burned again.  Your middle was grabbed and someone was pulling you off your feet.  You panicked and brought yourself out of the stupor that seeing Envy had put you in.  Hohenheim had an iron grip around your middle and he was carrying you out, Al running by his side. 

            “Let go!” You screamed.  Damn it, you couldn’t let Mustang fight that thing on his own.  He didn’t know how to kill them.  He didn’t know…

            “I won’t leave you behind a second time Edward,” Hohenheim protested, “and if that means that military dogs get sacrificed then so be it.”  Anger fueled you into slamming your fist into his knee.  The man’s grip faltered and you fell from his grasp. 

            “Well _I’m_ one of those _dogs_ ,” you spat. 

            “Now is not the time for this quarrel, Edward,” Hohenheim glanced behind you and faltered.  You glanced back too and your blood ran cold.  Furher Bradley had joined Envy, his eye patch undone and the mark of inhuman beasts glowing on his eye.   Hohenheim grabbed your arm before you could bolt for Mustang.

            “Brother,” Al looked and sounded unsure.   

            “I’m not leaving the colonel alone Al,” You said.  Al’s facial features hardened.

            “Okay,” he said, “Let’s do it.” 

            “Alphonse,” Hohenheim hissed, “remember what I _told_ you-,”

            “-And I told you that I was going to support Brother when the time came,” Al said firmly, “I gave you a fair warning.”  Hohenheim sighed giving into the determination that both of his sons wore but still looking hesitant. 

            “Alphonse,” Hohenheim started.

            “Dad, you can’t run from them forever.”  Al gave his father a hard look and Hohenheim sighed. 

            “I suppose you’re right,” Hohenheim sighed.  He reached into the depths of his cloak and pulled out a small box, “Envy is my burden Edward, but I will trust you with Pride: Bradley’s son.”  He gave you the box and you opened it, confused.  There was dust inside and your stomach crawled.    

            “Is this…” You asked breathlessly and Hohenheim nodded, “You’ve been carrying this around for how long and you haven’t taken care of him?!”  Your anger was boiling over.

            “I have my reasons,” was all Hohenheim said, “I’ve got your back.”  Then he was racing into battle.  You tucked the small box inside your pocket and looked at Al. 

            “Are you ready?”  You asked.  Al gave a firm nod and you steadied your nerves.  You raced to the front yard, where the fight had migrated to.  Other Homunculi had joined the fight and Havoc and Mustang were having a hard time keeping Envy, Wrath, and Pride at bay.  Confusion wrapped itself around your brain, why were the homunculi trying to get Hohenheim anyway?  You weren’t given much time to think because pride was flying at you. 

The little shit had tricked so many people into thinking that he was an innocent boy, the son of the Furher no less.  It pissed you off and you went to transmute your arm before you realized that you no longer and an automail arm.  The slight hesitance was all Pride needed to smack you with a shadow.  You felt the ground before you felt the initial sting on your ribcage.  You vaguely heard Al’s cry of your name before he was being attacked.  Your heart squeezed, Al wasn’t in the armor.  He could get hurt. 

“Al!” You screamed. 

            “I’m fine!” Al grunted as he transmuted a weapon from the earth.  You followed suit attacking Pride from the side while Al got him head on.  Both attacks were deflected and you were flung backwards, having just enough time to grab Al and shield him from the impact of the ground before you both were rolling to your feet and charging again.  It just seemed like child’s play to pride, the way he easily pushed the two of you back.  You growled as you pushed yourself off the dirt for what seemed to be the 15th time. 

            “Aw, are you done already?” Pride asked with a giggle. 

            “No,” you growled.  You glanced at Al to see he was out of breath and hurt as well.  You clenched your hands into fists before clapping and slamming your hands to the ground.  Dirt and moved and headed for Pride, who sidestepped the transmutation and with a great amount of pull and strength you changed the direction the dirt moved forming it larger and larger.  Defined fingers formed and you slammed the wave down on the homunculus. 

            “Edward, what the hell are you still doing here?”  You didn’t bother looking at Mustang.  You were too busy coordinating your next move with Al.  The two of you molded the earth that had crashed on top of Pride and formed a sphere trapping the child inside.  Then slowly you began to flatten the sphere when it suddenly burst open and knocked you and Alphonse backwards.  You rolled to a stop and a kick in the ribs forced your momentum to start up again.  You pried your eyes open to see a seething Pride coming after you again.  You dug your hand into your pocket just as he pulled his chubby leg back again.  You pressed the box to his foot and his body went ridged. 

            “Al,” You called weakly. 

            “Here, brother,” Al sounded like he was in pain.  You took your vision off of Pride for a moment to look at your brother.  He was breathing heavily and bleeding but he seemed to be okay. 

            “Do you remember the circle?” 

            “Yeah,” Al started to draw around them when he was suddenly tackled from behind. 

            “Al!”  Wrath had knocked your brother to the side like he was nothing more than a rag doll.  You were torn between going to your coughing brother and holding Pride in place.  If you moved his remains then he would be able to fight again.  Bradley was coming in and he was reaching down for you when he burst into flames and a bullet lodged its way into his head.  You looked behind you but saw nothing. 

            “Thank you first lieutenant,” Mustang muttered.  You realized that Hawkeye was hiding out in the trees acting as their sniper. 

            “Al!” You called.

            “I’m okay,” Al choked back as he continued to draw the circle. 

            “Mustang, get the hell out of my circle and keep him distracted,” You ordered.

            “What the hell did you do?” Mustang asked when he realized pride couldn’t move.

            “I’m winning now get out of my circle,” you demand as Al starts making the inside equations.  Mustang looks miffed but manages to get Wrath out of the circle before he becomes fully aware and starts fighting again. 

            “Okay brother, it’s ready,” Al said while glancing around frightened.  You tried not to look at the angry homunculi trying to stop the two of you.  Luckily the team was skilled enough to keep them at bay while you worked with Al.  You quickly placed the remains inside the child’s pocket.  He was able to move his foot into your side and control the shadows to be pointed at you.  You barely had enough room to breathe comfortably.  There was no way you were going to be able to get out of the circle without smudging the lines. 

            “Do it Al,” you ordered.

            “Brother!”

            “DO IT!”  You yelled. 

            “No, we can just-,”    

            “Damn it Al, we don’t have time for this,” you growled.  The homunculi were slowly getting the better hand they would be on the two of you any second.  You clapped your hands together before pressing your fingers to the circle.

            “ _Brother!_ ” 

            Pain was the first thing you registered.  It was a sharp pain that stabbed you everywhere.  It took all of your concentration to just bare it and continue the transmutation.  Then you registered screaming, whether it was you, Al, or Pride, you couldn’t tell and you didn’t care because you could see those god awful red rubies spilling over the ground.  Pride wasn’t going to live much longer.  It was all you needed to know to keep the transmutation going.  Finally when you knew there was nothing left for the homunculus to puke up you ended the transmutation.  Your vision wavered terribly but you forced yourself to roll over anyway.  You had to end it.  Pride was standing too; he still had control of the shadows that were frozen around your body.  They inched closer just as you heard a loud bang and then they fell away.  Pride crumbled to the ground a small red dot on his forehead. 

            You sighed and your body relaxed into the ground each limb screaming in pain.  You really had to thank Hawkeye after this.  Then there were hands under your knees and neck.  The spike in pain caused you to cry out and open your eyes, when had you closed them?  You saw lots of gold and red. 

            “Brother?!”  Al was behind you and you tried to turn to him but you were too weak.  Then a very familiar voice filtered through your ears.  It was low, seductive, and feminine. 

            “Pull back Envy, we need to re-group!”  It was an order that was not instantly followed.  You weren’t sure if the silence that followed was due to a lack of fighting or because you had passed out. 

            When you opened your eyes again you saw a warm fire crackling away and your boots were sitting on the floor.  You shifted your body and groaned, the pain was gone but your body was stiff.  You forced movement into each limb causing pain and unnecessary bruising.  You head pounded profusely as you forced your body into a sitting position and your heart pounded fiercely in your chest. 

            “Edward?”  You looked through the black dots clouding your vision to see Hohenheim, “Lay back down.”

            “Al,” you croaked, “Where’s Al?”

            “Resting,” Hohenheim answered.  He hesitated before putting his hands on your shoulders and pushing you back down, “The homunculi have retreated for now.  They lost Pride and Wrath.  The only one left was Envy when Lust showed up and ordered him to fall back to regroup.  We probably have another hour or two before they attack again.  You need to rest.” 

            “Mustang,” You mumbled, the fire made you tired and agreeable, “where’s Mustang?”

            “Resting,” Hohenheim answered, “Like you should be.”  You heard no more and saw no more as the fuzzy blackness of a dreamless sleep consumed you.  Before you went completely under you thought you heard the man whisper, “I love you, my son,” but you didn’t think Hohenheim was even capable of saying those words to a child he left behind at the tender age of 5.       

            Forty minutes later you woke up with a much clearer head.  Your body was still stiff with post-pain but you forced it into action anyway.  Walking took effort but you needed to get ready to fight again.  You walked through the doorway with your boots in hand and your stomach churned before you.  There was lots of blood and if you didn’t look for the rise and fall of all the chests in front of you, you would have thought they were all dead.  Save for the one moving body in the corner of the room.  Fuery was the only one not bloodied but he looked like he was concentrating on sending a message or deciphering one, so you let him be. 

            “Edward.”  You looked up to see Mustang rising.  He had an eye patch over one eye and his military jacket was in tatters.

            “Mustang…what happened to you?” 

            “Oh, just a scrape on my cornea, it’ll heal,” Mustang answered.  His voice was tight and he looked livid, “Never mind that, what the hell were you thinking starting up that transmutation while you were _in the circle._   You’re lucky to be alive right now.” 

            “I just wanted him gone…”  You mumbled feeling very much like Elicia when Hughes scolded her for doing something reckless. 

            “You should have done something else!  You were very close to dying!”

            “I just wanted to protect Al!”

            “Then protect him but don’t forget that you have a life too and you _aren’t invincible_ Edward,” Mustang growled, “There are people here trying to protect you too, and damn it you make everything so difficult!”  You bite your lower lip.  Damn it, you were supposed to be angry with Mustang.  How dare he tell you how you should protect your brother!  What the hell did he mean by other people protecting you?  That was just…unexpected and damn it why did it make your chest tighten and your eyes water?  This wasn’t supposed to be like this!  You were supposed to snap back at him, make some sort of witty comment and brush everything off.  Why couldn’t you think of anything to say? 

            “I-I just…” Damn it your words were catching in your throat now.   You heard a sigh and suddenly arms were wrapped around your chest. 

            “All I’m asking Ed is that you just think things through before you do them.”  You nodded against Mustangs chest because you didn’t think you could speak without sobbing all over him.  Everything was so confusing, why did you feel like a reprimanded child instead of bantering like normal? 

            “Brother?”  You jumped and pushed away from Mustang.  You swiped at your eyes, Al couldn’t see you cry. 

            “Yeah?”  You winced at the rough sound of your own voice. 

            “The colonel’s right…Just…remember that I’m trying to fight with you too.” 

            “Yeah, okay Al.”  You smile weakly and Al sits up the sight making your skin crawl.  It looks as if he is rising from a pile of corpses.  Then you notice there are extra bodies, “When did they get here?”  You ask referring to the second half of the team. 

            “Shortly after your stunt.  They were part of the reason Lust came and ordered Envy to fall back.  They were horribly outnumbered but still managed a good deal of damage on us.  Your father and I have been working on plans and tracking down the things we needed to kill them off for good,” Mustang answered. 

            “You mean to tell me that he’s had their…their remains this whole time and he never once did anything to try and kill them?”  You growled.

            “Brother, dad has his reasons…” Al piped up.

            “Where is he?!” you asked.  He needed a good punch in the face for this one. 

            “He said he was going to take care of a root problem,” Mustang said, “something about a father?”  The words didn’t make sense to you but Al paled. 

            “You let him go alone?”  Al asked meekly.

            “…What is it Al?” You asked a sense of dread in your stomach. 

            “Father…well dad only spoke a little about him…”  Al mumbled, “Something about being the ruler of the homunculi?  Something about how he controlled them and gave them orders?” 

            “Oh god,” Mustang mumbled.  You realized it shortly after.  Hohenheim probably wasn’t coming back.  Your stomach churned when you realized that the words you thought had been fabricated before you slept were real, and truthful, and a horrid goodbye from your birth father.  A sound of distress came from your throat and damn it all again.  You weren’t supposed to care for that traitor!  You were supposed to hate him!  You were supposed to want him gone.  Damn it, why were you crying? 

            “Brother…” Al trailed off as you furiously swiped at your eyes, “I think it’ll be okay.  Dad wouldn’t have gone if he didn’t think he could win.  Besides, he didn’t even say goodbye so I think it’ll be okay.”  Your tears only poured faster from your eyes.  He _did_ say goodbye, he said goodbye in the same way he did when he left you as a child.  You pressed your palms to your eyes, trying to push the tears and memories of your father’s departing words before he left your life for 12 years. 

            _“I love you, my son.”_ They were exactly the same as then.  Damn it.  Damn it. Damn it!  The warm hands were back around your shoulders.  The colonel didn’t say anything this time; he was simply at a loss for words.  You and Al were the same.  You had spent so many years declaring your hate for your father hoping that one day, the ache in your chest would disappear.  If anything it only got bigger. The door creaked open and Mustang had his gloved hand out in an instant.  A moment before he snapped Al called out,

            “Wait!”   You wiped at your face and push away from Mustang prepared to fight.  Hohenheim stood in the doorway, bloody, bruised, and battered. 

            “Envy can shape shift,” you called out surprising yourself at how logical and clear the statement was when your brain was in a state of disarray. 

            “I’d lay my life down for my brother,” Al said with a determined look.

            “I’d hold you back and do it myself.  For both of you,” Hohenheim answered. 

            “It’s him,” Al clarified before rushing to Hohenheim’s side, “we decided on those phrases just in case we got separated.”  That seemed to be enough for Mustang who weaved through the sleeping soldiers and helped Al assist Hohenheim through the room.  It was a miracle the man was even upright.  His left arm was definitely broken and his right arm was incredibly battered.  You hurried through to the bed you were previously occupying and tossed the covers back so Al and Mustang could ease Hohenheim onto the bed. 

            “What face is that Edward?  You look so concerned.”  The man’s voice was small and croaked and you forced a frown onto your face.  

            “You damn fool,” you grumbled, “Why they hell would you go alone?  Just because I don’t _like_ you doesn’t mean I’ll accept you walking to your own death.  That’s not okay…not at all.”  Damn it the tears were back.  All you got was a blank stare of surprise from Hohenheim and one of shock from Al.  Even Mustang looked a little bewildered.  You couldn’t take it anymore.  You turned tail and left the room.  You tripped over Hawkeye in your haste to get out of the room and she awoke with a startled gasp and a pistol in her hand. 

            “Edward?”  She questioned blinking the sleep out of her eyes, “how are you feeling?” 

            “Like shit,” you answered honestly.  Her eyes widened in concern before she brushed her thumb against your cheek.  She pulled it away wet.  Damn it.  You scrubbed your face with your sleeves embarrassed to be seen crying. 

            “What happened?”  She asked.  You were about to spill the whole story when there was a loud noise followed by a second equally loud noise, “everybody up!”  Hawkeye yelled.  There was instant movement from the corpse looking bodies on the ground.  Chiyo scrambled to stand next to you and the gun she held quivered in her hand. 

            “Are you okay?”  You asked while tugging your boots on.  She nodded her lips pursed together.

            “And you?”

            “I could be better,” you answered as Mustang and Al rushed out to you.  As a group you all left the house, leaving Hohenheim to bandage himself at his request from the other room.  You made it outside and gasped when you saw the huge homunculus slowly making its way toward the house. 

            “Oh god,” Havoc muttered. 

            “That one is Sloth,” Al said, “Dad taught me enough to recognize them.”  Mustang dug around in a black cloth bag and pulled out a box marked ‘sloth.’  You felt your irritation rise again.  If this man truly had everything he needed to disperse the homunculi then why didn’t he?  Sloth finally arrived and he glanced at the members with a lazy eye before lying down and looking at the sky with a sigh.  There was a moment of disbelief before Mustang took action and placed the box in the large palm of Sloth’s hand.  The huge homunculus froze up.  His one eye drifted over to Mustang who was suspiciously drawing the necessary circle.  The pure amount of stones that the homunculus threw up was overwhelming but the stench when he died was even more so.  They heard a curse from the woods. 

            “Sloth failed, failed he did.” 

            “Well in all fairness I didn’t tell him to kill everyone.  I only asked him to get here,” the sultry voice of Lust responded to the whiny one of Gluttony. 

            “Well whatever, we can have a little fun now can’t we?”  Envy followed out looking excited.  You breathed in through your nose and out through your mouth trying to keep calm.  There was only three left.  Then the soldiers started pouring in.  Most of them high ranking officers with sneers on their faces. 

            “So these are the traitors that killed the Furher?”  Kimbly stepped out of the woods and you nearly choked on your saliva, “this will be fun.”  Several others stepped into the fray, Armstrong, Ross, and Brosh stepped out as a team.  The feeling of betrayal swept through you as they joined the ranks of higher military men.  Several of them you didn’t recognize but Mustang sure did. 

            “So all of you have been poisoned by the Homunculi?  Will you really set aside your humanity for a few precious stones?”  Mustang asked the crowd.

            “Of course they will,” Envy sneered, “Isn’t that what it means to be _human_?” 

            “No.”  Armstrong said sternly, “It is not.”  You watched as he punched the ground taking out half of their numbers in on amazing display of alchemy.  As the smoke cleared you noticed the man had removed his shirt and he and his team had moved over to stand next to Mustang.  There was an angry growl through the crowd and suddenly everything was going up in explosions.  Kimbly was a big pain after all.  

            “Chiyo!” Mustang barked, “You use time and space Alchemy right?!  Can you move those explosions into a different area of space?” 

            “Do you ever listen?” Chiyo barked as she fired the pistol she was holding at oncoming targets, “I can only use it every _ten years_!  That’s why Hawkeye taught me how to shoot!”

            “Can you use any other alchemy?”

            “Just crystal ice but it’s not very effective for fighting,” she answered, “I can’t read remember!  I don’t even know how I transmute!  It just happens!”  You defended her weak side from a stray bullet that she almost missed. 

            “In any case,” you yelled to her, “use your crystal alchemy to but up barriers around the house and your own blind sides!” 

            “Right!  Got it!” 

            “How’s that for thinking clearly?”  You smirked at Mustang.  He snagged you by the back of your hood and pulled you to the side just as a stray rock pelted past you.

            “You’re getting a bit too cocky here kid,” He said before setting his newest victim on fire.  You moved away from his side to assist Al when Lust dropped down beside you.  You barely managed to dodge her fingernails before hitting the ground and rolling.  Although not fast enough, she managed to stab your shoulder on the rebound and you gasped in pain. 

            “Brother!”  A fantastic display of alchemy from Alphonse had water from the river being pushed out at Lust through an earthen pipe.  The nail ripped from your shoulder and you staggered to your feet.  You stood in front of Al defending him, “the colonel has the bag,” Al said softly in your ear. 

            “Okay, I’ll get it.”  You ran back to Mustang’s side and ducked around a large fist that came your way before you transmuted the ground into his leg.  He was on the ground seconds later.  You pinned him there with another transmutation, “Mustang!  I need Lust’s box!” You whispered. 

            “A little busy Edward,” Mustang growled as he fought off attacks coming from several directions.  You grabbed his standard issued pocket knife from his back pocket and you cut the bag from his waist. 

            “Got it!” You informed him, ignoring the “hey” he had sent your way.  You dodged several attacks while digging in the bag and hurrying back to Al’s side.  You grabbed the box marked with Lust’s name on it, “Catch AL!”  You yelled.  You threw him the box and he fumbled once before getting a good grasp on it.  You dug your feet in the ground when Envy jumped in front of you. 

            “Watchya got there pipsqueak?”  Envy taunted.  You reached in and grabbed Envy’s box before yelling at Armstrong who was nearby.  You threw the bag when he looked over and he caught it.  You were hoping he would catch on because it didn’t seem like he knew what it was. 

            “Nothing,” you answered while shoving the box in your pocket.  Envy wasn’t going to go down easily.  The greenhead frowned but charged after Ed anyway. 

            “I suppose I’ll have to beat it out of you!”  Envy was on you before you could blink, your body was propelled backwards by a powerful kick that had you coughing.  You moved through the pain and pounded your fist into Envy’s back, right over his kidney.  It seemed these organs still hurt homunculi, if Envy’s howl of pain was anything to go by at least.  Your braid was grabbed as you moved past him and you were tugged backwards by it. 

            Envy’s arm shifted into something dangerous and sharp looking.  You clapped your palms together and smashed them into the ground, hopeful that this transmutation was going to work in time.  Envy seemed to think you had lost your touch because he started laughing.

            “Are you losing your touch FullMetal Pipsqueak?”  Envy taunted as the light from the transmutation grew brighter but no visible transmutation happened.  Sweat lined your brow and you hoped that Envy would be too entertained for a few more moments so you could finish without being cut up.  The blade was pressed into your already wounded shoulder and for a moment you almost lost the transmutation.  You had to breathe and focus.  Screaming helped.  Screaming helped a lot.  Less and less did they sound like scream of pain but more of rage.

 You finally pulled the fruits of the transmutation from the ground.  Precious metals which had been hidden deep under the earth now rose and formed a sharp blade that resembled the one you used to use with your automail.  The blade itself was short but sharp and the handle was long enough to place a second hand on it for more power.  You swung the sword at Envy’s side cutting him and knocking him off of you just as a shot rang out and a bullet was put through Envy’s head.  You rolled to your feet taking a moment to breathe.  Soldiers were piling in and you lifted your blade to defend yourself.  They were quickly wiped to the side by Armstrong. 

            “The bag,” you wheezed, “give it to Mustang!” 

            “I will lad,” Armstrong assured.  You turned your attention back to Envy, thanking the stars that he had been shot as well.  Hawkeye was truly a life saver.  You stepped heavily over to him, pulling the box out of your pocket as he regained consciousness.  You were about to press it on his chest when Envy screamed,

            “LUST!”  Then there was suddenly pain behind your shoulders and a sharp pressure at your neck.  A small noise of disbelief escaped your lips as Envy stood looking triumphant.  Then the screaming started.  You managed to look to the side to see Mustang killing Gluttony off.  The rest of the soldiers had been dealt with and were either restrained or dead.  The blaze of his power was so bright you had to close your eyes and concentrate on breathing. 

            Lust moved and so did the nails in your body, a small whimper of pain sounded.  You forced your eyes open and searched for Alphonse.  He looked okay, shaken, but okay.  Armstrong was lending him a supporting arm when they noticed the precarious position you were in. 

            “Brother!”  Then just like that, everyone’s attention was on you. 

            “It’s just us Envy,” Lust drawled, “Do it.”  Envy pulled something out of the pouch on his hip and rubbed the two objects against each other. 

            “Will it still work if father is dead?” 

            “It should,” Lust answered.  A large grin spread across Envy’s face.

            “This will hurt pipsqueak,” Envy sang before pressing the stones on either side of your head.  The pain was instantly so great that you forgot about the nails in your body before you leaned down to puke.  A scream died on your lips before the memories started to organize and sort themselves in your brain.  Before you know it you’re standing in the same room where you and Al were transmuted back to normal.

   _“Alright let’s do it.”  You feel the energy of a transmutation and a wild energy that seems to feed constantly into the circle._

_“I’ll keep it as painless as possible.”  You nod and watch in fascination as your automail starts to disappear at the fingers and real flesh starts to replace it, “Alright we are entering the self sustaining stage.”  The energy changes only slightly and the automail leg starts to disappear as well.  You think the screaming is coming, there’s supposed to be pain.  It doesn’t come.  Instead Chiyo speaks again._

_“Okay Hohenheim is taking Al back,” she said, “He’ll be back for us as soon as he gets Al in bed and the safe house secured.”_

_“Okay,” you answer, “How long will this take?”_

_“Not sure…” Then suddenly the pain starts.  The black monsters are eating your metal arm and it hurts._

_“Chiyo!” You’re panicking, she’s not answering you back, “Damn it! CHIYO!”  The little black monsters are chewing on the metal eating it away unable to touch the flesh that replaced it. Your nerves sung in pain and your limbs started trembling.  You were unable to end the transmutation to help; you would bleed out in a matter of minutes._ This is where someone is supposed to knock Chiyo out, you know it. You’ve had this nightmare so many times.  It doesn’t come either.

_“Who are you?” Chiyo asked, “What’s an Envy?”  you feel the fear in your stomach.  Envy was there!  Then you heard him._

_“Use the stones, Lust.  If the little pipsqueak remembers this then it’ll be bad for us.  He’ll actually know how to transmute us.”  It was then that you realized this type of circle could be used to deconstruct only.  A type of divine construction.  Nothing would be spared._

_“NO! Nii-chan!  Let him go you-,” Chiyo’s voice suddenly cut off and you heard something crumple to the ground then suddenly you couldn’t hear anything. You could feel pain though, lots of pain and confusion.  You knew you were stuck in the realm of the gate until something brought you out._

                You slowly became aware of your surroundings again.  You were slumped against Envy’s leg, every limb trembling and Lust had a nail at your neck.  There was a tug at your hood, you were being dragged backwards.  Used as a hostage so they could get away.  Then Al was there being dragged beside you, talking to you.  Strange how nothing seemed to make sense except for the fact that your hand was touching Al’s cheek and it was warm and it was right.  Al touched your hand and suddenly sound rushed back into your ears. 

                “Brother!”  Al pleaded.

                “Shut up!” Envy snapped, “You come any closer and we’ll kill them!”  He yelled to the soldiers.

                “Envy,” the voice was deep and commanding.  You turned to see Hohenheim walking, surprisingly steady, towards you. 

                “I-I’ll kill him!  You old fool!” 

                “He is your half-brother, is that why?”  Hohenheim asked.

                “Half-brother?” Lust asked sufficiently distracted.  Al grabbed you by the arm and pulled you away from the two homunculi.  There was a scream of rage before Lust was aiming her nails at the two of you.  You flinched waiting for impact but it never came.  You opened your eyes, startled to see Hohenheim on his hands and knees over you and Al, five sharp nails jutted from his body just as hands were pulling at your arms. 

                “Edward,” It was Mustang, “Get up.”  You couldn’t.  Your father had just…just…what? 

                “Mustang,” Hohenheim said quickly.  You looked at the Hohenheim’s chest.  A nail was jutting out where his heart was.  Another through a lung and a third through his abdomen, “I’ve seen the way you and my son interact…I…I pass him off to you.  I hope you can be a better father than I, please take care of him.”  Mustang didn’t miss a beat while you were stuck staring at the _blood_ pouring out of Hohenheim’s body. 

                “I will,” Mustang promised. 

                “Dad?” Al questioned.  His broken voice pulled you out of your stupor. 

                “You idiot!  Who gave you permission to sacrifice yourself?  Who-who said you could leave again?”  You yelled.  Fat tears leaked from your eyes, heavy gasps filled your lungs and it hurt to breathe. 

                “Go,” Hohenheim ordered the light dying from his eyes as he clapped his hands, “I love you boys.” 

                “You can’t say it now!  Say it like you do every night!  When you think we aren’t listening!  Or when you think…when you think we’re sleeping!”  You scream all those nights as a child coming back clearly.  Hohenheim smiled and Mustang grabbed you and Al around the middle and took off in the opposite direction.  Perhaps Mustang had sensed what was coming, perhaps he and Hohenheim had more of a talk than just the ashes of the homunculi but the man booked it like he knew the explosion was coming.  There was a flash of red and several philosopher’s stones flew into the air before disintegrating.  Hohenheim’s blood rained down on them and you saw the fragmented remains of his glasses tumble away before they too disintegrated. 

**Well now that I feel like a horrible person I’m going to ask that you all a let me know what you think and don’t forget to find me on tumblr and facebook!**


	14. Where I Belong

Chapter 14

Where I Belong

 

                **I wanted to thank everyone for reading this far and sticking with the story even though my updating speed is NOT up to par!**

**This marks the END OF THE JOURNEY and I really hope you all enjoyed reading!  I know the previous version had two sequels but I don’t think I’ll be writing them.  I’ve lost a lot of my passion for FMA and I find that regrettable but true.  I still had a great time writing the story and seeing all your fun reviews! SO GIVE ME ONE LAST GOOD ROUND OF FEEBACK AND REVIEW!  I LOVE YOU ALL AND GOODNIGHT!**

 

“Edward, please.”  Hawkeye was trying to calm you down now but how could you?  That bastard up and left you again!  You were not on the verge of hysteria you were in it.  From fat tears, to struggling to breath, to just not being able to _stay still_ you were panicking, and you hated it.  Stressed noises escaped your lips in place of words and you had to stop everyone in a while to try and suck in air, “It’s going to be alright.”  How was it going to be alright?  Hohenheim sacrificed himself, for you, for Al!  How was any of that _alright_?  And Al…Al loved Hohenheim.  You looked over at your little brother.

Al was no better off.  Well he wasn’t in quite the hysterical mess you were worked up in, but the tears were streaming down his face too.  Havoc was whispering something to Al, who nodded and accepted the embrace that Havoc offered.  You released another pained noise and the pacing continued.  You had your hair in such a tight grip you were sure it was being ripped out. 

Suddenly you were stopped, hands on either side of your arms, spinning you around.  Panic was the first thing you did. Flail and scream while sobbing was the second and then as you slowly realized it was Mustang who was holding you and sinking to sit on the floor while stroking your hair, you began to grip his shirt and bury your face in his neck.  Damn it this wasn’t fair.  You weren’t supposed to feel like this.  You were supposed to hate him.  You weren’t supposed to want that traitor back in your life. 

                “Shhh,” Mustang soothed.  Damn it all you were supposed to be the one comforting Alphonse.  He at least _liked_ Hohenheim, “Just breathe, Edward.”    It seemed easy enough, so you tried.  It was painful and hard to keep your breathing long enough to get a proper breath but eventually you started to get the hang of it again. 

                “…Al,” you heard Chiyo’s teary voice behind you.  It was enough to have you clutching Mustangs shirt in a death grip again and for your breath to hitch. Mustang seemed to realize this and he smoothly stood, supporting your weight with his forearms before he walked into a separate bedroom in the house. 

                It was quiet and you liked it, there weren’t any soldiers here being treated.  There weren’t any tears in here, aside from your own, and it gave you the chance to properly gather yourself.  Mustang’s heart was the only noise besides your own breathing and you took comfort in that. 

                “Better?”  Mustang asked softly.  You only nodded against his chest, “Talk to me Ed.” 

                “What’s wrong with me?” you croaked.  You didn’t even cry this hard when your mother had died. 

                “You’re having a panic attack, Ed,” Mustang said his voice still low and quiet, “Just keep breathing, you’re doing fine.” 

                “Why did he…why did I…why _am_ I?” 

                “One at a time, kiddo,” Mustang said his hand still stroking your hair. 

                “Why did he _do that_?”  You gasped choking on your intake of air.

                “You’re his son, Ed.” 

                “H-He never-,”

                “Ed,” Mustang sounded so serious that you had to cut yourself off, “Don’t finish that sentence because Hohenheim _did_ sacrifice for you before this.  His whole life has been sacrifices for you and Al.”

                “How would you even know that?  You weren’t _there_ he didn’t come to _her funeral_!” You yelled pounding your fists on Mustangs chest ignoring the pain that flared up from the injuries you had sustained.

                “He couldn’t come if he wanted you to live.”

                “LIAR!”  You screamed.

                “He’s talked to me Ed.  He told me that the Homunculi have been searching for him for years.  When they started getting too close for comfort, he left Risembool. He left you, Al, and your mother so you wouldn’t be killed.”

                “He…didn’t…he,” your mind was racing, trying to sort this information.  It was too raw too shocking and too unfamiliar.  It didn’t sound like the Hohenheim that you had grown to hate. 

                “Ed, we can talk but I want you to get looked at first,” Mustang was starting to sound far away, “Ed?  Come on you’ve lost a lot of blood and you need to get patched up.” You were still trying to sort file impossible into slot square.  It wasn’t working. How were you supposed to process this information?  How was Al processing this information?  What were you supposed to _do_? 

                There was a thumb peeling back your eyelid, when did you close your eyes?  Mustang seemed concerned but you were still trying to comprehend the fact that your father supposedly _loved_ you.  He did those awful things because he didn’t want you or Al to get hurt?  Why didn’t that make sense?  No, why did you refuse to believe it?   Why did the knowledge of this make your eyes burn and water?  Why did it seem like you were stuck in the repetition of hysteria and normalcy.  Damn it, you weren’t supposed to be pressing your face into Mustangs shoulder and leaking with tears. 

                The warm hand on the back of your head stayed for only a few moments before there were other voices in the room.  You blocked them out, unwilling to face the facts you normally craved.  You left your mind to retreat and become a blank slate while hands moved your arms, head, and body as they pleased.  You felt the pain but it flittered right through the blankness of your mind.  Eventually everything stopped and you were warm, really warm and comfortable enough that everything faded back into the battle grounds. 

                Hohenheim was crouched over your body, blood dripping from his wounds onto your face and hands.  Tears shone in his eyes and you noticed the trembling of his limbs while he looked over your head and spoke.  The sound didn’t reach your ears as it wasn’t meant for your ears to hear, but you could still read his lips.  Why was he asking Mustang to take you in?  What did he mean by all of that?  The way he looked at you?  What was that supposed to mean? 

                Then it was like you were sucked right back into the heat of that moment.  Sound burst into your eardrums and you heard screaming and explosions.  Red stones fell from the sky and dissolved as they touched the ground.  Blood rained down, soaking everything and everyone in its way.  You felt your stomach roll and hot acid forced its way out and onto the blood soaked ground. 

                You shot up into a sitting position trying to wipe the blood from your body, short whimpers and breaths filling the now silent air.  You could _feel_ the slick liquid over your body but it was impossible to see it as the room was dark and your vision weak.  As you slid your hands over your arms you felt pain, lots of pain but it had to be ignored because you also felt blood.  Then you felt warmth and it was hard to move your hands, something was blocking them and you vaguely heard Mustangs voice before you fell back into a void of blankness and Hohenheim.  There was also a lot of embarrassing tears. 

                “Edward?” 

                You felt a gentle pressure on your forehead and groggily you turned your head to where the pressure was at its strongest.  A small noise came from your throat as you forced your eyes to open and when you saw the blurry outline of Mustang, your heart squeezed.  For some reason, he reminded you of Hohenheim.  A strange numbness took over your body as your thoughts filled with Hohenheim; the feeling was too raw, too painful.  It was easier to stuff the feelings away behind a wall of nothing.     

                You blinked, waking up more and realizing that you had been trapped within your own nightmares of Hohenheim’s sacrifice.  Clearly you had been cared for as you were no longer in the cottage Hohenheim and Al had resided in, but in the familiar landscaping of Mustang’s home.  You wondered just how long you had been out and where Al was.  How was Al feeling?  And Chiyo?      

                “Wher’s Al?”  You croaked.  You tried to bring a hand up to your face but a sharp pain in your shoulder had you leaving that one down and bringing your other hand up instead. 

                “In the living room,” Mustangs deep voice rumbled over your ears as he pulled your hand away from your face. 

                “And Chiyo?”  You asked, blinking to clear up the rest of the haze that fatigue brought.

                “Can you sit up?”  Mustang brushed your bangs out of your face. 

                “Yeah,” You struggled upwards and fought the waves of dizziness, Mustangs hand on the back of your neck was grounding and you appreciated it, “Where’s Chiyo?” You asked again.  Mustang hesitated and cleared his throat.

                “She left you a note,” Mustang said cautiously.  Your heart sank into your stomach and while you _knew_ that she wasn’t going to stick around you were hoping she would have at least said goodbye. 

                “…yeah…okay…” You struggled to get the words out.  The pain of losing yet another person was persistent but you shoved that behind the wall of numbness as well.  Mustang helped you to your feet and you hurried to the living room where Al was sitting with a blank stare and a plate of waffles.

                “Al,” Mustang said, “eat.”  Al blinked once, coming out of the trance.  He saw you and shoved a forkful of syrup covered waffles in his mouth.  You settled next to Al and ignored the note on the stand next to the couch. 

                “What did I miss?” You asked as Mustang forced a plate of the food onto you as well.  The man sat down on the armchair across from you and gave you a hard stare.  You understood instantly and cut off a bite of the food.  Mustang waited until you had swallowed and cut off another bite before he started to speak.     

                “Hawkeye and I managed to get things together here with the help of Hughes-,”

                “-He’s okay?” you interrupted with a mouthful of food. 

                “Better,” Mustang said with a pointed glare to chew and swallow, “He was the one who got recording devices on Armstrong and his team.  It’s thanks to that, that things are moving as smoothly as they are.  With all the high ranking officers that were a part of the coup d’état there was little room left for natural hierarchy to rise into missing positions.  We are releasing pieces of the recordings to the people, they’ll decide who rises to become Furher and that person will then decide who needs to be promoted to fill ranks.”

                “The _people_ are accepting of this new technology?” you asked unbelieving. 

                “Some of them struggle and call it witchcraft,” Mustang sighed, “others are more understanding of science and things like recording devices.  Regardless of their level of belief, a new Furher still has to be chosen.”

                “Are there candidates?” Al spoke up.

                “Yes,” Mustang answered, “A few men you two don’t know, Armstrong and myself.” 

                “You’re in the running?” Ed asked shocked.

                “Yes,” Mustang sighed, “and Armstrong accepted the candidacy only as a fall back.  If he is chosen he has informed me that he will accept for the necessary trial period then turn the rank over to me.”

                “That would mean he has to give up his career as a state alchemist,” you realized.

                “…Yes it would.”  Mustang deflated in front of them and ran a hand down his tired face, “it was all his choice.  He only informed me a few hours ago.”

                “How long was I out?” you asked.

                “Maybe a day, maybe a little more,” Mustang said, “things have been happening pretty fast.” 

                “What else?”  You took another bite.

                “You want to know what happened in North City?”

                “Yeah.”

                “Aside from arrests and body clean up, not much,” Mustang said, “Intelligence is going through everything to find _something_ that will convince the skeptical citizens that this is real.” 

                “…So now what?” Al asked.

                “Now we wait.  The team is promoting me, as it looks bad if you try too hard yourself,” Mustang said.  You nodded, in all of the history of votes, not one man who promoted himself had been chosen.  The people of Amestris merely saw it as self-praise and big-headedness.

                “And everyone else is okay?”  You asked.  Mustang nodded and released a breath.

                “What are you two planning?” You blinked and replaced the fork that was halfway to your mouth.  What were you going to do after this?  What were you _supposed_ to do after this?  You looked at Al, surprised to see that he wasn’t looking at you.

                “We could get an apartment together,” you suggested, “I’ll retire, and get a job or something.”  Al shifted uncomfortably and he set his plate down.

                “I’ve been thinking, brother,” Al started, “and I know you aren’t going to like it.”

                “…what do you mean?”  Your heart was pounding in your chest. 

                “I’ll stay here for a while,” Al said, “just until things settle down and order is restored…if that’s okay with you Colonel.” 

                “By all means,” Mustang shrugged, “I have the room.” 

                “And then?” You asked your heart plummeting.  Your head knew exactly what Alphonse wanted and what you were too selfish to take. 

                “Then I’ll move in with Winry in Risembool,” Al said his gaze directed at the ground, “I’ll help with the automail.  I know you don’t want to go back there and I’m willing to go alone.”

               “Al…I…” You couldn’t force the words out; you _didn’t_ want to go back to a quiet life after so many years on the road.  You didn’t want to go back to the place that held painful memories of your mother and your dumb father.  You didn’t want to witness the love between Alphonse and Winry grow and blossom while you were stuck behind twiddling your thumbs away listening to granny lecture. 

                You had just gotten Al back and already he was moving further away from you.  He didn’t _want_ to have the life of adventure and bustling cities that the two of you had and you knew it.  You were the only one that seemed to enjoy being on the move all the time, the thrill of traveling to a new place, the thrill of finding something _new_.  Al was the type of guy who liked comfort, routine, and normalcy.  You understood, you knew it had been coming but it still hurt to think about.

                “I’ll visit,” you said softly.  Al gave a pained smile.

                “I know you will.”  Al placed a hand on your arm and you couldn’t help but stare at it.  Flesh, real, thriving.  You had completed your goal and now all that was left was figuring out what to do next.  You didn’t think it would be so hard.

                “I don’t know what to do,” you said after a minute.  You had always worked towards getting Al his body back, that’s all it had been for years.  Now that he had it, no that you had nothing to work for, you were at a loss.  It was like floating in a void, so many possibilities to go to but you couldn’t see them, you just knew they were there. 

                “May I remind you,” Mustang started, “that you are welcome to stay here?”  You blinked a little shocked.

                “Careful Mustang,” you started, “Some people might say you’ve grown attached to me.”

                “Well they wouldn’t be wrong.”  You blinked in surprise and your jaw opened and closed a few times.  How could Mustang just _admit_ that?  It didn’t make sense.

                “You should take some time to think about it, Brother,” Al said, “I’ve been thinking for a while so I know it would do you some good to look at all the possibilities.” 

                “Yeah I guess that’s what I’ll do,” you said with a forced smile.  The phone started to ring and as Mustang walked away to answer it you put the rest of the waffles down; you had lost your appetite.  You picked up the note from Chiyo with numb hands and unfolded it.

                _Aniki,_

_I’ve already told Niichan but you’ve been asleep for a while so I’m going to have to say goodbye this way.  Equivalent Exchange got me pretty good this time.  The gate is tricky and I didn’t catch on until it was too late.  In exchange for my knowledge on people, homunculi, and seeing the possible futures as well as the alchemy, the gate has taken my freedom to go where I please.  I can’t stay with you or Al anymore.  I have to go and I’m sorry for that.  I really wanted to see you for a longer amount of time.  Just know that I love you and while I don’t think our paths will ever cross again, I’ll still think of both of you._

_-love Chiyo._

                The handwriting was unmistakably Hawkeyes.  As you wiped the tears from the corners of your eyes you could still recognize her stilted style and sharp periods.  It made sense as Chiyo was never taught how to write but her feelings were still conveyed and it made your heart break a little.  Equivalent Exchange really was a pain sometimes.  They had been given an awful lot with Chiyo and you were certain that there was more than she was letting on but it wasn’t like you could as her. 

                “She really wanted to stay with you,” Al said after a moment.

                “Yeah?” You looked at his face while he looked at his waffles.

                “Yeah,” Al said, bringing his eyes up to yours, “she wanted to force you to Risembool so we could all stay together.  I told her I didn’t think it would happen and she laughed.  Said you were too stubborn of a mule to leave the colonel.” 

                “More selfish than anything,” you muttered, “I’m too selfish and maybe I should go to Risembool.”

                “But would you be happy there?” Al asked his eyes boring into yours.

                “…no,” You said after a moment.

                “Exactly,” Al was determined to get his point across, “you need to stay somewhere where you’ll be happy brother.  We are always a train ride away and you can always come to Risembool when you’re stressed and for holidays.  We’ll actually get to celebrate them!  It’ll be good.” 

                “Yeah,” you smiled thinking of all the stew granny would make, “good.”

                “If you want my opinion,” Al started, “I think you should stay with the colonel.” 

                “Why?” You asked confused.  It wasn’t like the two of you loathed each other anymore but Al hadn’t been around for very long and half the time you had been unconscious. 

                “You two balance each other out pretty well.  I think you’ll be good for each other,” Al said, “Besides I heard the First Lieutenant always wanted a kid.”

                “What is _that_ supposed to mean?” You asked shocked.  Al gave an impish grin before shrugging.

                “Oh nothing.” 

                “You little punk,” you growled before tackling Al and ignoring the pain in your shoulder from where Lust had gotten you. 

                Mustang came back to see you put Al in a head lock and he shook his head when you were flipped underneath Al and forced down.  Al’s body might have gotten smaller but his skill in combat was still top notch and as you tried to get out from under him, you realized that you never _had_ and probably never would win in a fight against him.  It was just too hard to put your all into a fight where Al was soft and mushy again. 

                “Voting starts in a week boys,” Mustang said while stepping over the two of you, “and Alphonse I expect your vote to fall with my name.” 

                “Yes sir!” Al chirped as he shoved your face into the flooring. 

*****

                You pulled awkwardly at your uniform hating how it fit and how it forced you to bend to the rules of others.  The people had gathered and with several complaints and questions at the hurried election, you were surprised that there were only a few fights and breakouts.  You had started to break out into a sweat at the beating sun and heavy fiber of the uniform, there was just the counting of the votes left.  That was it.  Then you could go home and, then what?  You weren’t sure. 

                You glanced at Al who was sitting next to other family members of the on duty military members.  You would have to say goodbye to him today and you weren’t sure you were prepared for that.  The previous night had treated you to several nightmares of Hohenheim and Alphonse’s demise.  You wouldn’t ever tell Al, but Mustang had been a pretty good about it when you accidentally woke him.  He understood in a way that made you suspicious about his past but you’d never ask. 

                Even as you stood in uncomfortable boots and clothing the weight of Hohenheim’s sacrifice settled on your shoulders.  You could feel emotions pressing against the wall of numbness that you erected and you could sense an impending breakdown that you didn’t want Al to witness.  You had a few more hours to keep everything together and then you could go home and release it.  It would take time to pull yourself together but you were pretty damn sure that you could keep Mustang away long enough to put a mask on.  You released a breath, the official counters had returned. 

                “After several recounts and ballad checks, we have found a new Furher to correct the mistakes of our previous.  This man has worked for many years and he has achieved great things.  I can think of no better man to accept the position, other than Furher Roy Mustang.”  As the crowd, females you realized, burst into cheers and applause you rolled your eyes.  You were happy that Mustang had been elected but damn you didn’t want to deal with his ego. 

                You tuned out the rest of the ceremony and waited until you could go to Al’s side.  When you did he was quiet and the two of you walked away in synchronized steps.  The silence was oppressive and you wanted to say something but nothing came to mind.  Al’s hand brushed against your arm and you took his hand in a tight grip, a silent declaration of your support, even though you really wanted him to stay you knew this was best for Al.  Just like staying in Central was best for you. 

                “My train leaves soon,” Al said.  The two of you hurried to the station and just before he got on his train you pulled him in for a tight hug.

                “I love you Al,” You said.

                “Love you too brother, promise to visit?”

                “Yeah, you too?”  Al nodded and hopped on the train as the whistle blew.  You stayed long after the train was out of sight and when the station started to crowd again, you left.  You headed straight for Mustangs, the walk was long and it gave you too much time to think.  Hohenheim, Alphonse, Chiyo, and Mustang all crowded in your head and when you got Mustang’s you were already crying as you walked in the door. 

                The house was silent and you were thankful for its emptiness.  You were able to sink down on the rug in the living room and cry.  Too many feelings slammed into your heart and head.  You couldn’t sort them or comprehend them, you could only feel and cry and _grieve_ because you _missed_ Hohenheim.  You hated him for leaving and you hated him for coming back in your life only to sacrifice himself but damn it all you _missed_ him.  

                Alphonse was your entire life, he was your purpose.  Now that he was gone you weren’t sure what to work for, what did you need to do?  Who did you need to live for?  What was your purpose? _Who_ were you _really_?  He was your brother, the last of your blood, and you couldn’t imagine a life without him but here you were, alone. 

                Chiyo was like a little sister, you loved her but it was different.  You didn’t love her like you loved Al or even Winry.  There were still things about Chiyo you didn’t understand or trust.  You wanted her to stay but now you couldn’t help but wonder if that was because you had no one else.  No one that you were comfortable with at least.  Hohenheim was gone, Al was gone, and now the last piece of your childhood was gone.  Like the ashes of your house in the wind. 

                Then there was Mustang, that pompous asshole had wormed and wiggled his way into your life and your heart and damn it all, you _hated_ that.  At the same time you _craved_ his words of comfort, the sturdy support he was at night when you couldn’t hold your shit together and nightmares seemed to become _real_.  You hated that you depended on him and you hated that you actually liked him.  Yet you didn’t want to leave him.  You didn’t want him to leave you.  Then as if you had summoned the asshole himself, you felt warm hands on your shoulders and the deep rumble of Mustangs voice. 

                When you brought your face from your hands you noticed hours had ticked by without your consent and the stars were shining out.  You didn’t intend to stay crumpled on the ground for all those hours.  You meant to cry out your grievances and then move on.  Why couldn’t you get up and move on?  Why were your limbs shaking and why, oh why did your tears continue to fall? 

                “Easy Edward,” Mustang looked exhausted and his body sagged but he still pulled you up and into his arms, “you’re safe here.”  Damn it all you hated him.  You fucking _hated_ him. 

                You buried your face in his chest and clutched at his shirt with gloved fingers, you never did change out of your uniform.  Mustang was strong and steady, his whole body became your support system and the hand in your hair did far more for your nerves than you would have liked to admit.  Grief shook your shoulders and you didn’t think you could handle anymore loss. 

                “Don’t leave,” you pleaded brokenly.  You couldn’t take Mustang leaving too.  You just, couldn’t.  You weren’t sure how long Mustang intended to let you stay but you weren’t sure you ever _wanted_ to leave.  As the man’s fingers undid your ponytail and separated strands of your hair between each digit you knew this is where you belonged.  You wanted to say and you wanted to be with this dumbass grown man who couldn’t get over his own damn reflection. 

                “I’m not going anywhere, Ed.” 

                “Can I stay with you?”  You asked between sobs. 

                “I already told you, you could didn’t I?”

                “No…” You started then broke off.  What if Mustang said no? 

                “No what Ed?”

                “I mean…I just.” You weren’t sure you could say it.  Fear of rejection was too strong and you didn’t want to know that you had to leave.  You didn’t want to remember there was a time limit.  You wanted to stay with him and you wanted to continue your strange relationship that made you feel like a wanted son rather than an unruly subordinate.  Damn it all to hell, Roy Mustang had officially claimed his place in your heart as a surrogate father and the sly bastard had done it _months_ in advance. 

                “Ed,” Mustang started as if realizing what you wanted, “when I offered you my home I didn’t mean for it to be temporary.  You don’t have to stay here; I want you to _live_ here.”

 

                And damn it all you couldn’t stop the yeses from spilling out your mouth.   

 

 

**End**

**I wanted to thank everyone for reading this far and sticking with the story even though my updating speed is NOT up to par!**

**This marks the END OF THE JOURNEY and I really hope you all enjoyed reading!  I know the previous version had two sequels but I don’t think I’ll be writing them.  I’ve lost a lot of my passion for FMA and I find that regrettable but true.  I still had a great time writing the story and seeing all your fun reviews! SO GIVE ME ONE LAST GOOD ROUND OF FEEBACK AND REVIEW!  I LOVE YOU ALL AND GOODNIGHT!**

 


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